Maybe
by SkylarEQuinn
Summary: InkVerse WWII Human AU. Feliciano Vargas was once confident in everything he did, always following the commands of his Lieutenant, Ludwig Beilschmidt. After an accident causes Feliciano to become cowardly and question his position in the military, Ludwig is the only person left to help him through the rest of the war.
1. Chapter 1

_Before I get a lot of reviews telling me that Feliciano is OOC in this, I'm going to state one thing. I am aware. It's part of the story that he's written like this. He will turn to his usual self in time, just please enjoy the story and you'll see why he's written this way at first._

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 _Spring, 1939, A Small Italian Village_

"You did _what_?" Roma Vargas demanded of his auburn-haired grandson. The dark-haired older man looked as if his eyes were going to pop out of his head. "Feliciano, please tell me you're _considering_ it, that you didn't _actually_ do it just yet!"

Feliciano Vargas shook his head, his auburn bangs falling into his face. "Grandpa, isn't it always you who was telling me that I could grow up to do anything I wanted, to _be_ anything I wanted?" he asked. "So why are you suddenly so against what I want to do? It's not like I'm going to be hurting anybody who doesn't deserve it." He shrugged indifferently. "Besides, it's like I'll be doing something good for myself and for you. I'll be keeping everyone safe."

"That's not the point," Roma stated. "Feliciano, do you even understand what it means to join the military?"

"Of course I do," Feliciano grumbled under his breath. "I'll keep you and Lovi safe from all of the bad guys. Everything will be just fine, Grandpa! Don't worry about me! I'll be working for our fantastic country, and everything will be perfect!" He began to hum happily to himself. "I'll be like a hero, you'll see!"

"Feliciano, this is war!" Roma tried to explain to his happy-go-lucky grandson. "It's not like in the books you read! People die! People don't always come home! Don't you understand that?! You could _die_!"

"Isn't that just one small sacrifice for what is right?" Feliciano laughed. "Besides, I'll make it back. I always do!"

"Those are trips to the market! Those are always guaranteed trips home!" Roma barked, beginning to lose his temper.

"Not everything in life is guaranteed, Grandpa," Feliciano said, suddenly becoming serious. "It was Grandma who taught me that."

"Andriana, please talk to the boy," Roma said to his wife, gesturing to their grandson. "He is speaking nonsense. He does not seem to understand what is going on."

Andriana Vargas smiled at her grandson. "Feli," she softly said, smiling at him. "You have grown up so well, my sweet grandson. Why would you want to join the military, huh? And just _how_ did you join the military?"

"The military is in desperate need of men, Grandma," Feliciano said. "I just lied a little about my age and they let me in."

Roma's eyes widened. "Feliciano, you are only fifteen years old!"

"They said I had to be eighteen, but I look old enough. I'm certainly tall enough, right?" Feliciano stretched his arms out. "I'll fill out the suit perfectly. Everything will be just fine."

Andriana began to cry softly as Roma stepped forward. "Look what you've done, Feliciano!" he barked at his now-fearful grandson. "You've made your poor grandmother cry! Is this what you wanted?"

Feliciano quickly shook his head. "N-No, Grandpa! I-"

"Just go to your room and think about what you've done!" Roma commanded.

The young Italian boy scurried up to his room, too scared of his grandfather to do anything else. He hadn't thought of this sort of outcome. All his life, he had been told to be brave and strong, yet now when it came time to prove himself, no one wanted him to. What kind of a world was this?

.

 _Winter, 1939, Berlin, Germany_

Feliciano shivered in his military uniform at his new post. He could hardly believe that he had made it this far in the military, but he guessed that they really needed the able men. His breath was coming out in small puffs of smoke, but he was too excited to care. There was nothing more exciting than feeling like an important person.

A tall man with slicked-back blonde hair and piercing blue eyes stood before Feliciano. " _Guten tag_ ," he said in a gruff voice.

" _Buongiorno_ ," Feliciano greeted back.

"Oh, you're Italian," the German man sighed in English. "Welcome to Berlin."

"Thank you," Feliciano said. He was truly fascinated by the man's features and could barely look away. "I am Major Feliciano Vargas."

"Pleasure to meet you," the man said with a nod. "I am Lieutenant Ludwig Beilschmidt."

Feliciano put his hand up in a salute to him as Ludwig did the same. "It is an honor to meet you, Lieutenant Beilschmidt." For a moment, he could've sworn he saw a smile cross Ludwig's face, but he wasn't completely sure. "I take it you are who I will be taking orders from during my time in Berlin?"

"That is correct," Ludwig stated. "I have been told that I am fair and a great leader. I led one of the battalions in Warsaw, Poland back in September."

Feliciano's eyes widened. "That's impressive! I'm glad to have you for a leader then."

Ludwig nodded. "Just don't let me down, Vargas."

The young Italian gulped. "I won't," he said, struggling to keep his voice from shaking. He was terrified of letting this magnificent man down.

Ever since Feliciano was young, he had known that he found men more desirable than women. His whole family knew that, but no one else did. Since the war started, Feliciano had to be more quiet about his preferences, hearing that people with his preference were taken away to other places. No one knew what happened to those people, but Feliciano never wanted to chance it, so he kept quiet. But he wondered how he could ever keep quiet about a beautiful man like Ludwig. Even at that moment, he was biting his lips to keep silent.

"Is something wrong, Major Vargas?" Ludwig asked him, eyeing him carefully.

"Nothing, sir," Feliciano quickly said, standing at attention. "You have my full attention." _Wasn't that just the truth?_ "Do you have anything you would like me to do, Lieutenant?"

Ludwig eyed him curiously. "Nothing for now," he simply stated. "At ease, Major."

Feliciano relaxed. "Right," he softly said. He needed to relax. It wasn't good to be so tense around this man. There was so much tension already that being tense around his Lieutenant would just make things worse.

The Lieutenant watched the young Major for a moment, unsure of how to react to him. "Uh, why don't you go check in with your troops or something?" he suggested, trying to get him to go away without being too obvious.

"R-Right," Feliciano stammered. "I should probably go and do that!" He quickly took off to follow the command, eager to please his commander.

Ludwig watched as Feliciano ran off, wondering what the hell he had gotten himself into.

.

Feliciano cheerfully hummed to himself as he prepared for bed that night. He finally felt like an important part of the military and wanted to make the best of his time in Berlin. After all, he really wanted to impress that Lieutenant of his. His mind was filled with that beautiful blond-haired, blue-eyed German. Nothing else really seemed to matter to him at that time.

He thought back to how different his life had become in the past eight months. He had gone from living with his grandparents and brother in Italy to ranking up to a Major in the military! Even Feliciano was impressed with himself. Not too many people could make that much progress in such a short amount of time, but somehow he had done it, though he never quite understood how he had. Feliciano always lived a free sort of life, never really noticing militaristic things until the day that he joined the military to fight in the war.

His older brother Lovino had no interest in ever joining the military or helping out his country in a war, so he didn't understand Feliciano's drive and motivation to try to bring the world back to its old peaceful state. Even if he did understand, it wasn't like Lovino would ever do anything important like that. As much as Feliciano loved his brother, he knew that Lovino was extremely selfish. He never wanted to do anything unless it would benefit him.

Feliciano took a deep breath before going to the bathroom to brush his teeth. He was nervous about possibly running into Ludwig in the bathroom. After all, it was a public bathroom. He took a deep breath and left the bunks to go to the bathroom.

Ludwig was brushing his teeth when Feliciano walked in there. That caused Feliciano's heart to speed up. He suddenly felt nervous and insecure. No man had ever made him feel this way! It was madness to him. What did he do to deserve the torture of an attractive military leader? It just wasn't right in his book. Not by any means.

" _Ciao_ , commander," he greeted as he walked to the sink next to Ludwig's. He got out his hygiene supplies and put toothpaste on his toothbrush. "How was your day?"

"Lieutenant," Ludwig corrected, staring down Feliciano, toothbrush in hand. "I am a lieutenant, Major Vargas."

Feliciano looked down at his toothbrush. "Right," he mumbled. "Sorry about that, Lieutenant." He secretly wondered if all Germans were this touchy. He sighed. "What is on the agenda tomorrow?" he asked, looking back over at Ludwig, who had gone back to staring into the mirror as he brushed his teeth. "Are we going to train again?"

Ludwig let out a sigh. "We train daily, Major Vargas," he stated, a hint of annoyance in his tone. "Don't you know anything about how the military works? How the hell did you manage to become a Major in the first place?"

"I worked hard for it," Feliciano quietly answered. He began to scrub the toothbrush against his teeth, frustrated. What gave Ludwig the right to be so cruel? Yet why did he enjoy talking to him like this? Why was Ludwig's cruelty making him even more attractive in Feliciano's eyes. This wasn't right at all.

"I see," Ludwig mumbled. He spit in the sink and rinsed off his toothbrush. "Then I guess the Italian military is more relaxed than ours."

Feliciano felt offended, but didn't say a word back. Why was Ludwig being like this? Had he misjudged his character? "Tell me, Lieutenant, what joy do you find in talking down to others?" That was all he wanted to know. Where did this man find joy in belittling everyone? It seemed pretty sadistic to Feliciano.

The entire bathroom went quiet. None of the other soldiers had ever heard anyone speak to their Lieutenant like that, especially not a foreigner. No one knew what to do or say, especially when they saw how angry Ludwig looked.

"What was that, Major Vargas?" he growled at him.

It was at that moment Feliciano knew he had messed up. "I-I just don't understand why you're being mean to me when I did nothing to you," he answered, trying not to let his voice shake. It was too late for that, though. He could feel his knees shaking. Feliciano knew he had gone too far.

"Major Vargas, go out and run laps around the building until I tell you to stop," Ludwig told him, fixing him with a hard glare. "It will teach you not to disrespect me."

"But I never once-"

"Go!" Ludwig shouted at him, pointing to the door of the bathroom.

Feliciano, frightened by the man's outburst, quickly left the bathroom to do as told.

.

Feliciano felt as if his lungs were going to burst before the endorphins kicked in. He didn't understand why he would have to run so much just for asking a simple question. Then again, he didn't understand these German men at all. Was this like a game to them or something? All of those Germans were sadists, he was sure of it. His reasoning behind that was because all of Ludwig's troops were watching Feliciano run, whether it was through a window or actually standing outside and watching. Feliciano had never felt more humiliated in his life, but he kept running, determined not to give up. He had worked too hard for his and wasn't about to let it all waste away just because of one man. One very handsome man.

"Major Vargas!" Ludwig called out to him. "That is enough! You may come back inside and sleep!"

Feliciano slowed to a stop to catch his breath. He felt sick, but knew that if he vomited it would just mean that Ludwig won. He would not admit defeat so easily. Let Ludwig try to break his spirit. It wasn't going to work. Deep down, Feliciano was a fighter and only wanted what was right for himself and his country. And there was no way he would ever let anyone change that.

Ludwig gave him an impressed look once he walked back to the building. "Major Vargas, you run terribly slow, but you never stopped running," he said. "Well done. You deserve some rest. But just so we're clear, if you speak that way to me again, the consequences will be much worse. Do you understand?"

Feliciano nodded, clutching his stomach. He managed to stand up straight and look the other man in the eyes. "Understood, Lieutenant," he responded before going back to the barracks.

As he laid in his bunk, eyes shut, all he could think about was how Ludwig's blue eyes had been on him all night. Sure, he didn't like being in trouble with him, but being in trouble had gotten the man's attention, and that was enough for him at that moment.

Before he drifted off to sleep, his last thought of the night was how he wished he could get Ludwig's attention like that without being in trouble.

.

Feliciano's legs were killing him the next morning. He didn't know if he would even be able to get out of bed. The pain in his legs was so bad that he could barely move them. Why did he have to question Ludwig the night before? Now he was certain he wouldn't be able to walk today.

He struggled to rise to his feet. His knees shook and trembled under his weight, which wasn't even that much. He was a rather small man, but he honestly didn't know how much he weighed until standing up that morning. He knew he would never again question anything regarding Ludwig.

He managed to get out on the field in time for morning training, though he had no idea how. It must've been a God-given miracle. All he was hoping was that Ludwig wouldn't make him run again. That would be the worst!

"I assume you're not feeling well today?" Ludwig asked him, blue eyes inspecting his every step. "Your legs hurt, Major Vargas?"

Feliciano knew Ludwig was taunting him, but he wouldn't let the German man win. He stayed silent and faced forward to command his own troops.

"Major Vargas, I asked you a question," Ludwig reminded, standing in front of Feliciano.

"I am aware," Feliciano told him, nodding to him. "But I am choosing not to answer."

Ludwig narrowed his eyes. "Well played, Major Vargas."

Feliciano honestly felt extremely terrified as he stood there next to Ludwig. He knew that if Ludwig found anything wrong with anything he did, it would be back to running, or maybe even something worse. He began to sweat nervously. If he didn't follow direction perfectly, things could end badly. After all, he had a strong feeling that Ludwig didn't like him at all. He had those suspicions because of the eerie silence that hung between the two of them. It was almost tangible and extremely uncomfortable for Feliciano.

"I am impressed," Ludwig suddenly commented. "You are still managing to walk after last night."

Feliciano looked Ludwig in the eye. "I guess I'm just tougher than I seem," he simply stated. It took every ounce of courage inside of him to say that one sentence. He felt he would probably die before saying anything more.

"You are the only subordinate of mine who will look me in the eye," Ludwig commented. "Why is that, Major Vargas?"

"Eye contact is the key to conversation, Lieutenant," Feliciano told him, maintaining eye contact. He knew there was no way he could avert his eyes after that, no matter how badly he truly wanted to. The most he could do was keep himself from trembling. "That is what my grandfather taught me."

Ludwig's eyes narrowed. "Your grandfather is a smart man."

"He is," Feliciano agreed with a nod. He really hoped he didn't have to hold eye contact much longer. No matter how dazzling Ludwig's eyes were to him, this was too much pressure. He felt as if he would crack and crumble to tiny pieces if Ludwig were to look him in the eye any longer.

The German man looked away and toward their troops. "Listen up!" he shouted out. "Major Vargas will be leading the marches today!"

Feliciano wanted to die. Just what he needed, more walking. How could Ludwig be so cruel?

.

After doing drills for the day, Feliciano finally sat in the mess hall. His legs felt heavy as lead, but he had managed to lead the marches properly and bite the bullet through the pain. Oh, how he wanted to slug Ludwig for making him do that, but he knew he would have to refrain if he wanted his legs to feel better.

He glanced around at all of the unfamiliar faces in the cafeteria. So many people he didn't know. So many people he would probably never know. It almost made him sad to think of how many of these men would die in this war. He tried not to think about that as he focused back on his food.

His eyes then glanced back up as Ludwig sat down at the table next to his. He hoped Ludwig wouldn't say a word to him. After all, he was in enough pain without having to feel the tension of talking to Ludwig. If things were to get tense, Feliciano knew that he wouldn't be able to eat a single bite, and to him, that was the worst thing that could possibly happen.

Feliciano's heart began to pound when he saw that Ludwig noticed him. He took a deep breath as the Lieutenant got up and carried his tray over to sit across from him. His lungs felt as if they would collapse in on themselves as the perfect German seated himself across from Feliciano. He felt a knot forming in his stomach.

"Good afternoon, Major Vargas," Ludwig greeted, locking eyes with Feliciano.

The young Italian major knew he couldn't look away. "Afternoon, Lieutenant Beilschmidt," he said back, trying to keep his voice from shaking. He really hoped that Ludwig didn't want to hold too long of a conversation. All he truly wanted was to enjoy his food, and he definitely couldn't do that with Ludwig making firm eye contact with him.

"I just wanted to say that you did a nice job leading marches today," he said. "I understand that your legs are sore from running last night, but you still did it anyway. You have gained some of my personal respect today. I thought you should know that."

Feliciano didn't know what to think. "Thank you, Lieutenant," he said quietly.

"Major Vargas, call me Ludwig when it's us speaking as friends," Ludwig told him.

"Only if you call me Feliciano," he responded.

"You have yourself a deal."


	2. Chapter 2

_A/N: Hey guys! Sorry that this chapter is so late! I've been very sick lately and was unable to work on it! I hope you enjoy this chapter!_

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 _Early March, 1942, Berlin, Germany_

"Goddammit!" Ludwig shouted, pounding his fist on his desk. His pounding caused everyone in the room to jump, especially Feliciano, who didn't like loud noises. "I should have known!"

Feliciano slowly approached Ludwig's desk. "Is something wrong, Lieutenant?" he softly asked. He tried to hide the fact that his knees were shaking. There was no way he would acknowledge that he was even slightly afraid of an angry Ludwig.

Ludwig's face was burning red with rage. "That lying bastard!" he raged. His gaze then went to Feliciano. He was so filled with rage that the Italian's hair looked even more red than normal. "We're going to be leaving for Warsaw this evening. We have some unfinished business to take care of there."

"Unfinished business?" Feliciano asked, confused. "I don't understand what you mean." He studied Ludwig's expression for a moment. What could the man have to be so angry about?

"We overlooked a situation in Poland a couple years back," Ludwig stated through clenched teeth. "No I must go and correct my error."

"But I have to go, too?" Feliciano asked. He didn't see why he would have to go to Poland with Ludwig, if the Lieutenant was perfectly capable of handling it himself.

"You are one of my Majors, and I will need you for backup," Ludwig stiffly stated. "We have no idea of what this man is truly capable of if he can lie to a military official with no problems."

"Wait, someone lied to you? _That's_ what this is about?" Feliciano asked.

"You weren't there," Ludwig snarled at him. "You wouldn't understand." He stood up from his desk and briskly walked to the door. "Come with me for briefing, Major Vargas."

Feliciano internally groaned but followed after his superior.

.

As the military vehicle plummeted along the rough terrain, Feliciano sighed. The car rocked back and forth constantly, almost making him feel as if he were at sea. He wanted the ride to just be over already, but he also knew that there was still a long way to go. Might as well just grin and bear it, even if he was nauseous.

"So tell me more about this Laurinaitis guy," Feliciano said to Ludwig. Though he had been told the story more than once, he couldn't understand what was so bad about the man being Jewish. Yes, the man had lied to the government, but that wasn't a good reason to take him away, right?

"He is the filthiest scum in the land," Ludwig growled out, as if the words left a bitter taste in his mouth. His facial expression was made of pure and absolute disgust. "Not only did he lie to a military official, but he is also a Jew being harbored by a filthy crossdresser!"

Feliciano didn't understand Ludwig's outrage, but he decided not to press any further, seeing how upset his superior officer was getting. "I see," he muttered. Personally, nothing was wrong with that statement, but that was just according to him. He had no problem with the way others lived their lives unless if it was harmful to others. All he wanted was for everyone to live in peace. That was the only reason he had joined the military.

Ludwig began softly grumbling to himself about the man they were going to apprehend, but Feliciano decided not to pay any attention. It was better to just let Ludwig grumble to himself than get involved. The German didn't want anyone to agree or disagree with him. He just wanted to rant, and Feliciano respected that.

The young Italian just let his thoughts on the matter wander inside of his head. He tried to contemplate how someone could be so terrible due to their religion or race or even what type of clothes they wore. It didn't make anyone any less of a person, so why did it matter what they did in their personal time? He just couldn't understand what supposedly made these people so bad. Yes, they lied, but so what? As far as Feliciano could see, they only lied so they could avoid a terrible fate. It didn't make sense to me why they would get such a terrible fate anyway.

His mind then began to think of other things. Was this Laurinaitis man in a relationship with the crossdresser? Feliciano hoped that wasn't the situation. He had heard rumors of homosexual men being taken away, but he wondered where they were taken to. Though his curiosity usually got the best of him in these kinds of situations, he wouldn't dare ask Ludwig what happened to those men.

Feliciano's mind then wandered to a dark place. If any of his fellow soldiers were to find out that he was a homosexual, what would happen to him? Would he be taken away as well? The thought of it sent shivers down his spine. A cold chill ran through his body.

"Are you cold, Major Vargas?" Ludwig asked, peering over at him.

"Not at all," Feliciano answered, folding his hands in his lap tightly.

"You're shivering," Ludwig flatly told him.

Feliciano stopped his trembling. "No I'm not."

Ludwig sighed deeply and just left it at that. He found no point in arguing with Feliciano over something so trivial. After all, he had much bigger things to worry about, like how to capture the three people he was after. If any of them were to escape, the mission would be a failure. He tried not to think about failing the mission.

While Ludwig thought about the mission, Feliciano was trapped inside his head with his own thoughts. He pondered what happened to the homosexual men who were taken away. If he were taken away like them, what would become of him? Would he live to tell the tale? His heart began to hammer in his chest as he struggled to calm down. He couldn't be thinking like that while on a mission. If he was even the slightest bit distracted, the people would surely escape, and that wouldn't look good on any of their parts. Why did war have to be so complicated?

.

The next morning, they pulled up outside of a decent-looking house in Warsaw, Poland. Feliciano couldn't believe that the people they were after would be living in such a nice place. He had personally expected a rundown apartment building or something like that, considering the way Ludwig had referred to these people as "scum" many times.

Feliciano's legs shook a little as he stepped out of the car. They hadn't stopped to stretch their legs, considering the matter was of utmost importance. He personally found that ridiculous as he stumbled a little, trying to get used to being on his feet again. At least his nausea was gone. Of that, he was thankful for.

"Alright, men," Ludwig said, addressing the two soldiers they had brought with them. "There are three men in this apartment upstairs, and we need to take them all. Not one of them can escape. Do you understand?"

"Sir!" the two men confirmed, saluting Ludwig.

"Now, follow after Major Vargas and myself," Ludwig stated. "And follow only the commands I give you, understood?"

"Yes, sir!" the men stated.

Ludwig turned to Feliciano. "Are you ready to go, Major Vargas?"

Feliciano jumped when addressed, but then he nodded. "Yes, Lieutenant Beilschmidt."

Ludwig began to ascend the staircase to the apartment, gesturing for Feliciano and the others to follow. When he reached the top, he knocked firmly on the door as Feliciano stood behind him with the other men coming up the stairs.

When the door opened up, Feliciano saw a woman standing there. She had long, blonde hair and the greenest eyes he had ever seen. She was honestly quite lovely.

"Good morning, gentlemen," she said, smiling at them. "What can I do for you?"

"You can cut the act, Łukasiewicz," Ludwig snarled at her. "Or should I say 'Feliks'?"

Feliciano's eyes widened as he saw the woman's face fall. His mind couldn't comprehend the fact that she was really a man. She looked so feminine! He prayed in his head that everyone would come quietly. He couldn't bear hurting someone.

"I don't understand what you mean," the blonde said, voice pitched high to sound like a woman's. "My name is Sara."

"Your _mother_ was Sara, but you are Feliks," Ludwig corrected, narrowing his eyes at the blonde, who was beginning to shake with fear. "Now, where are the Jews you're harboring?"

"This isn't good!" he shouted out to the others in the house, his voice low like a man's. "They figured all of us out! They know!"

Ludwig grabbed Feliks and dragged him further into the apartment with him. Feliciano was finding it hard to keep up with them, as well as the other soldiers. Ludwig stopped when they reached the kitchen, where two young men sat at a table, terrified.

Feliciano's gaze fell upon the smaller one, who was trembling like a leaf in a windstorm. He instantly felt bad for him. He didn't look much older than thirteen. As for the other boy, he looked about Feliciano's age, which made the Italian feel a bit nauseous. He didn't want to hurt these boys. That was not his job!

"Don't think the three of you will escape," Ludwig snarled at the older boy. His tone of voice brought a cold shiver down Feliciano's spine. "We figured all of you out, you disgusting Jew." His attention suddenly snapped to Feliks. "And you. You're the worst of them, pretending to be a woman for two years…"

Feliks's voice suddenly broke out into the room, loud and pleading. "The back door, Toris! Run! Take Raivis and go! Go!" He began to struggle against the two soldiers who had suddenly grabbed his arms and began twisting them backwards in ways that couldn't be comfortable. "Toris, run! Take Raivis and run! Don't worry about me!" He cried out in pain as there was a loud snapping noise. "Run, Toris!" he shouted while being dragged toward the front door.

Feliciano felt sick. Was this what the military did? What had Feliks done wrong? He fought back a wave of nausea as Ludwig's commanding voice told him to go after the younger one. His mind focused once more on the task he was given and he took off with Ludwig after the two Jewish boys, though in his heart he felt it wasn't right.

.

"How the fucking hell did they get away?!" Ludwig shouted. " _Scheisse!_ " He took his gloves off and threw them on the ground in a huff as Feliciano struggled to catch his breath beside him. Ludwig then regained his composure and picked up his gloves. "Come on, Feliciano. We need to get back to the others."

Feliciano was so surprised by hearing his first name come out of Ludwig's mouth that he stumbled a little. It had been so long since he had called him that. The name almost sounded odd when coming from Ludwig's mouth.

"You ran well today," Ludwig simply told him. "Even if we didn't catch the two Jews, you did well. I do not have one single negative thing to say about your performance today." He cast Feliciano a warm smile. "Thank you for your work today."

"Not a problem, Ludwig," Feliciano answered, nodding to him. "It's my duty, right?"

" _Ja_ ," Ludwig answered. "But still, _danke_."

Feliciano felt his chest swell with pride. He smiled a little to himself when he was sure Ludwig wasn't looking. Getting a compliment like that from Ludwig at such a stressful time felt really good to him. His smile grew larger and larger until it could barely fit on his face.

"Why are you smiling like that?" Ludwig asked.

"I don't really know," Feliciano answered. "I guess I'm glad that I still got praise after what happened."

"Yeah?" Ludwig asked. "Well don't expect praise from the higher-ups. They're going to be so angry when they find out that the Jews got away…"

"We will deal with that when the time comes," Feliciano stated. "I just want to say that you did well today too, Ludwig. No matter what our superior officers may say, you did your best, and that's what matters, right?"

Ludwig sighed. "If only that were the case. They're going to let us have it when we get back, so enjoy your sense of hearing while you can." He groaned. "It's times like this when I wish I didn't have to go back. I failed the mission, therefore, I failed my country."

"Don't think that," Feliciano said. "You didn't let anyone down."

"The superiors were counting on me, Feliciano!" Ludwig snapped, turning to him. He stopped walking. "I let _them_ down!"

Feliciano stopped as well. "I forgot the part where the superiors were your entire country," he shot back. "Those Jews who escaped were only two people! They'll get over it! It wasn't our fault that they got away, okay? You sound ridiculous when you say that you let the whole fucking country down just by letting two harmless people get away!"

Ludwig looked like he wanted to say something else. It was obvious that he was fuming with anger. He kept his mouth shut, though. He knew Feliciano wouldn't understand what he was going through in his mind. They obviously weren't raised the same. He couldn't expect Feliciano to understand.

"We're leaving," Ludwig simply stated as he began walking back once more.

The Italian joined him in silence. He didn't understand why Ludwig was so tense. Who cared if it was a failed mission? At least they got one of them. All he could do now was hope that they wouldn't kill Feliks.

.

So they wouldn't argue and the tension would go away, Feliciano was assigned to the prisoner carriage by Ludwig. It was only Feliciano and Feliks in the carriage. Feliciano was lost in thought as Feliks slept against the wall.

As Feliciano looked closer at Feliks, all he could see was the bandage holding his arm in place. It made him nauseous to even remember when it got broken. Feliciano couldn't look at Feliks longer than three seconds without feeling sick.

Feliks began to stir and blinked his eyes open. He gasped out in pain when he moved his arm a little. His green eyes blinked tiredly. When he saw Feliciano, he gasped and cowered as best as he could without moving his arm.

"You don't need to be afraid of me," Feliciano stated in English. "I'm not going to hurt you."

"Liar!" the blond spat at him, barring his teeth. "Look what the lot of you did to me!"

"Correction," Feliciano stated, "the soldiers did that to you. I had nothing to do with that."

Feliks's eyes widened in disbelief and horror. "I don't believe you. You're one of them." His eyes began to fill with tears. "Why should I believe you?"

"You've got me there," Feliciano sighed. "Look, you don't have to believe me if you don't want to, but I'm not lying to you. Honestly, I don't think you did anything wrong." His eyes widened when he realized how casual he was being with the prisoner and cleared his throat. "But you didn't hear that from me."

"What? You have a reputation to keep up or something?" Feliks scoffed, rolling his eyes. "Guess no one hears anything useful from you, huh?"

Feliciano clenched his fists but then remembered this man had every right to be upset with him. "Look, Feliks, I don't make the rules, I just have to enforce them."

"You don't _have_ to do anything. You're just another military puppet who can't think for himself." Feliks groaned. "You military men are all the same." He frowned. "You ruin everything that is good and wonderful and turn it into a living hell for everyone but yourselves."

"That's not true," Feliciano argued. "We do it for the good of the world."

"Oh really?" Feliks shot back. "Then answer this question for me. Why are you killing off innocent people who did nothing wrong? Why are you killing the Jews, who just want to live in peace? Why are you killing the homosexual people just because they love someone their own sex?"

Feliciano felt a knot in his stomach. So when the people were sent to the camps, they were being killed there? He felt extremely uneasy at that revelation. "I'm not the one doing that," he simply told Feliks. "I'm not killing anyone."

"That's right," Feliks sarcastically responded. "You're just being a good little boy and leading the sheep to the slaughter."

Those words pierced into Feliciano's heart. Was that really what he was technically doing? The carriage started spinning around him. "That's not true," he tried to argue.

"Oh, but it is," Feliks snarled. "Or are you just blissfully unaware of what happens to your prisoners after you hand them over? You army men are all the same. You don't care what happens to anyone as long as you get to be seen as heroes in the end. Just know this, those of us who survive the camps will never see you as heroes. You'll all remain the shittiest people we've ever come across."

"I think that's enough talking," Feliciano stated.

"Or what?" Feliks asked. "You'll kill me? I'm already half there! Why don't you just finish the fucking job?!"

Feliciano clenched his fist. "Stop it!" he suddenly yelled. "Just stop it! I don't want to kill anyone!"

"Oh really?" Feliks asked. "Then why are you working for them?"

The Italian took a moment to calm down. Why was he working for them? "I just want peace once more," he finally answered.

"Well you're not going to get peace this way," Feliks scoffed. "The army will turn you into a killing machine before any of that happens."

Feliciano shook his head in disbelief. "That's not true. It's all lies. You can't be serious. I would never kill another person."

"But you're killing me by sending me over to the camp," Feliks replied.

"No, that's not true," Feliciano said. "I'm just following orders."

"Following hateful orders," Feliks snarled. "You may not realize that, but all you military people do is stir up hate until there's nothing left but that. You will never be a hero."

Feliciano sat and pondered Feliks's words. _You will never be a hero._ But wasn't that why he joined the military, to be a hero and to do what's right? A knot weighed heavily in his stomach. Was any of this right?


	3. Chapter 3

As Feliciano watched the other soldiers unload Feliks, he couldn't help but feel bad for the terrified Polish man. He wanted to help him in any way he could. He wanted to prove that he really wasn't a bad person, but he didn't know how to.

"What are they going to do with him, Ludwig?" Feliciano asked when he was alone with his Lieutenant. "They're not going to kill him, are they?"

"Why does it matter?" Ludwig asked him. "He's a prisoner, and he's getting what's been coming to him."

"What's his crime?" Feliciano demanded, eyes serious and expression stern. "What did that man do wrong?"

"Did you see the way he was dressed?" Ludwig demanded, gesturing in the direction that Feliks was taken. "Did you not notice how he looked at Toris Laurinaitis as if he were in love with him?"

"And you think those two things should be punishable by death?!" Feliciano angrily demanded. "People can't help things like that!" He quickly lowered his voice. "Ludwig, don't you understand how wrong and sick this is?"

"I don't understand what has you so upset," Ludwig firmly answered. "And if you're going to stay this upset about it, you can return to the barracks and not come next time."

Feliciano gave him a look as if he wanted to set him ablaze. "You are just the worst," he snarled at his superior. "Why can't you see that this is wrong? This is all wrong! We're not the heroes!"

"I think you listened to him a little more than you should have," Ludwig answered. "Because isn't that what the bad guy would want you to think?" He smirked at Feliciano and simply walked away.

The young Italian just stood there and frowned. "It's not right," he muttered to himself. "What is being done to Feliks just isn't right…" He then stalked off after Ludwig, giving the German the satisfaction of winning, if only for the time being.

.

Feliciano felt as if he were going to go insane as he sat in on the meeting where they were discussing what to do with Feliks. Their attitude toward the prisoner was making him sick, and he wanted to just get up and shout at all of his superiors. It was just awful, the inhumane things they were discussing doing to that poor man.

"He deserves proper medical treatment," Feliciano suddenly piped up.

"Feliciano!" Ludwig scoldingly whispered in an attempt to make his quiet down, nudging him in the ribs with his elbow.

"What was that?" General Roeder asked from the front of the meeting room.

"I said that he needs proper medical treatment," Feliciano repeated. "His arm was broken while we were capturing him."

"I don't give a damn what happened to his arm!" Roeder bark at Feliciano.

Feliciano jumped to his feet, unable to stand it anymore. "We're the ones who broke it! We need to fix it!" he countered. "I thought this was about keeping people safe!"

"Keeping the _Axis_ safe!" Roeder said. "Stand down, Major Vargas!"

Just as Feliciano was about to say something else, Ludwig grabbed him by the back of his uniform and ripped him back down into his chair. "Have you lost your fucking mind?!" he hissed into Feliciano's ear. "That man broke the law, and now you expect to get him pampered?!"

"That man did nothing wrong," Feliciano grumbled.

"Leave this meeting, Major," Roeder commanded. "That is an order." He pointed toward the door. "Until you learn to respect your superiors and this military, you can wait in the hallway."

Feliciano left the room calmly. He didn't make the gigantic ruckus that he had wanted to. His mind immediately went to Feliks. He wondered how their prisoner was doing. Was he scared? What was going on with him? He was so worried that he felt sick. There was nothing more that he wanted than to go and search for him, but he knew that would be suspicious and that he would get into a lot of trouble for it. But he couldn't help but feel so damn useless.

He sat against the wall until the meeting let out and he felt Ludwig kick him in the leg with his steel-toed boot. Feliciano didn't have to look up at the look on Ludwig's face to know that he had gotten his Lieutenant in trouble with what had happened in the meeting. In fact, Feliciano didn't want to look up at Ludwig, or even talk to him for that matter. He just wanted to be left alone with his thoughts of uselessness.

"Get up, Vargas," Ludwig said, digging the toe of his boot into Feliciano's leg once more. "We have things to discuss."

"Not here. Not now," Feliciano simply said, staring at his own feet. He didn't want to talk with Ludwig because he knew that his superior would never understand. It wasn't that Ludwig wasn't capable of understanding, it was that Ludwig followed orders, not ideas.

"Your attitude today will not go unnoticed," Ludwig stated, standing before Feliciano. "Now get up. That is an order, Major Vargas."

With a groan, Feliciano rose to his feet. "Let me guess, I'm running again?" he asked.

"We are going to go and talk," Ludwig answered. "I want to know what the fuck made you think it would be okay to say things like that. Now follow me."

Feliciano knew he wouldn't be able to argue against Ludwig, so he obediently followed after him. His heart was racing. He had never been in this much trouble with Ludwig before. Everything he had learned since joining this squadron told him that he was going to be hurting the next morning. Ludwig was going to make him pay for what he had said in the stupid meeting; yet for some reason, Feliciano didn't care at all. Something in his mind told him that if he was persistent enough with his words, Ludwig might possibly understand at least a little bit.

They soon found themselves walking around a field outside of the base. The sunlight shone down on them, making both of them feel so hot that they unbuttoned their jackets a little. Feliciano kicked at the rocks at his feet as they walked.

Ludwig broke the silence after awhile. "What made you think it would be okay to suggest that we give our prisoner medical care as if he were one of our own?"

"Doesn't everyone deserve medical care when in that bad of health?" Feliciano asked, determined not to look up at the handsome man looking down at him. He knew that if he gave in and looked up, he wouldn't be able to resist falling for Ludwig's charm and agreeing with him. At that moment, he needed to stick to his guns, for Feliks's sake. " _You'll never be a hero,"_ was the only thing keeping his head down at that time.

"Not when you're a prisoner," Ludwig answered.

"What was his crime again?" Feliciano asked. "Loving someone the same gender as himself? Dressing differently from others? What was so bad, Ludwig? I just can't bring myself to understand why people would do something so hateful to someone who never did any harm to another person."

Ludwig was quiet for a moment, trying to think of a proper response to that. "What he did was against the law. The law exists for a reason."

"The law is fucking bullshit," Feliciano spat, glaring at his boots as he walked. "This is so stupid. Feliks did nothing wrong. You realize we're not the heroes here, right?"

"What do you mean?" Ludwig asked, voice unsure.

"We're not the heroes. No one sees us as that," Feliciano repeated. "Feliks told me that when we were in the prisoner car on the way back to Berlin. We are the villains when we do hateful things like that!"

"We are _not_ villains, Feliciano," Ludwig argued. "You and I are doing what is right for our countries."

"Right in whose eyes?" Feliciano asked him, finally daring to look up at him.

Ludwig was silent as he thought. "What is your problem with the laws all of a sudden, Feliciano?"

"They're not fair to the people who are different, Ludwig," he simply answered. "It's not fair that people have to suffer because they're not the same as and don't prefer the same as everyone else. It's just not fair."

"Nothing about life is fair." Ludwig's voice was stern yet monotonous, as if he were repeating something that had been recited to him before. "And why do you suddenly care about the preferences of other people?"

Feliciano kept his mouth shut. There was no way he could be open about his personal preferences.

"I asked you a question," Ludwig insisted. "It is an order that you answer."

"Have you ever met a man who prefered men?" Feliciano suddenly asked him. "As in a man who fell in love with men instead of women. And what I mean by met is, have you ever been close to one who does?"

Ludwig thought pretty hard about it. "I might have," he finally answered. "I no longer have contact with him, though. We lost contact years ago when he decided to live his life in that way. It was dangerous for us to keep contact because I knew I would have to capture him eventually."

Feliciano felt his heart ache for Ludwig. From the tone of his superior's voice, he could tell that Ludwig cared deeply for the person. "Who was he?"

" _Mein Bruder_ ," Ludwig answered, frowning. "I don't even know what happened to him. Our parents were always so proud of me, but they were never proud of Gilbert. And then when they caught Gilbert kissing another man about five years ago, I thought they were going to kill him. That was when he left."

"And you haven't seen or heard from him since?" Feliciano asked.

Ludwig shook his head. "It's better that way. At least he's not in danger if they can't find him." He frowned. "Is it wrong of me to miss him, even though his way of life is against all I stand for?"

"It's not," Feliciano assured him. "Someone I know and love is like that as well." He frowned. "I would never give out where he is or any information like that. All I want is for him to be safe so I can still be friends with him after the war."

Ludwig let out a small, noncommittal hum. "I guess so."

"I have a question for you?" Feliciano stated.

"What is it?"

"Would you want to deny that man medical treatment still if he were your brother and not a prisoner from Poland?" Feliciano asked. He was almost nervous for overstepping his boundaries, but he needed to know.

The German was quiet for a very long time. "No," he finally answered. "But that's different."

"How?" Feliciano asked. "Feliks loves men as well. Feliks didn't hurt anyone. All he did was just be different from the rest of the people around him."

"It's different because…" Ludwig's voice trailed off as he tried to think of a good reason. Not having been able to come up with one, he sighed. "You got me, Feliciano. It's not different. I just wanted to believe that it was."

Feliciano nodded. "We all like to look away when matters don't concern us," he assured. "But there are people out there who care about Feliks the way you care about your brother and the way I care about my friend. What can we say or do for them?"

Ludwig was quiet. "The only ones who cared for Feliks were those disgusting Jews."

"So you hate them for not believing the same thing you do?" Feliciano asked. He thought for a moment. "Let's save that prejudice for another day, actually." He sighed. "Ludwig, my point is, Feliks is just another man, like you and me. He did nothing wrong. So why does he have to suffer?"

"Because that's the way the world is," Ludwig answered.

"Then I wish it wasn't."

.

That night, Feliciano laid awake in his bunk for a long time. He thought about Feliks and Ludwig's brother. He then thought of himself. What was he going to do? He couldn't hide his homosexuality forever. But what could he do about it? There was no way he could ever tell Ludwig.

Then again, his conversation with Ludwig had brought them even closer than they were before it. Ludwig had even forgotten to punish Feliciano for acting up during the meeting! That had to count for something, because Ludwig never forgot things like that.

The more Feliciano thought about Ludwig, though, the more in love he fell. He couldn't help himself. Ludwig was just so perfect. He was tall, muscular, beautiful, everything that Feliciano wasn't. His blond hair was always in place and those beautiful, blue eyes always had a softness about them when looking at Feliciano. What was there to say? Feliciano was hopelessly in love, and there was no way to ever change that. He knew that he would never fall out of it.

.

The next morning, Ludwig sat down across the table from Feliciano as they ate. "About yesterday," he began.

"What about it?" Feliciano asked. He glanced up at Ludwig, hoping that he wasn't going to get a punishment now.

"Thank you for helping me realize a few things I otherwise wouldn't have known," Ludwig said after a moment. "I never would have realized how big of a deal a lot of that stuff was if it wasn't for you."

"No problem, sir," Feliciano said.

"No need to be formal right now," Ludwig said with a crooked smile. "It's just us here right now."

"That's right," Feliciano said, pretending to remind himself of the fact. "Silly me."

Ludwig chuckled to himself. "I wonder about you sometimes, Feliciano."

Feliciano looked up at him and smiled. "No need to wonder. I'm a mystery no one has ever figured out. Don't waste your time on it."

That caused Ludwig to actually laugh. "Maybe if I get some spare time, I might," he joked. "But in the meantime, keep being my right-hand man."

"Roger that," Feliciano told him, smiling. He mock saluted Ludwig.

Ludwig smiled back and mock saluted him in return. "How are you feeling today, Feliciano?"

"As good as can be expected," Feliciano said. Truth be told, it was the best he had felt since they had captured Feliks. He had finally gotten a good night's rest and was ready to face things. "When do we get our next assignment?"

"Who knows?" Ludwig asked with a shrug. "Our last one didn't turn out as expected, so I have no idea when they'll count on us again for something important."

"True," Feliciano sighed, pushing his food around his plate with his fork. He no longer felt hungry at the mention of that mission. "So what do we do while we wait?"

Ludwig sighed. "I have no idea." He shrugged. "Just sit around and clean or something?"

"That sounds so boring," Feliciano grumbled. He then heard someone playing music on the radio by the window. "Hear that Ludwig?" he asked. "There's music playing."

" _Maybe the one who is waiting for you,_ " the voice on the radio sang,

" _Will prove untrue, then what will you do?_

 _Maybe you'll sit and sigh,_

 _Wishing that I were near._

 _Then maybe you'll ask me to come back again,_

 _And maybe I will say maybe._ "

Feliciano's mood instantly perked up. "My _nonno_ used to sing this song when I was younger!" he exclaimed. "I used to love it so much!" He began to hum along with the radio.

"I have never heard it," Ludwig admitted.

"But it's so good!" Feliciano insisted.

"Really now?"

Feliciano nodded and began to sing along. " _Maybe you'll think of me_

 _When you are all alone._

 _Maybe the one who is waiting for you_

 _Will prove untrue, then what will you do?_ "

Ludwig looked around at the people staring at Feliciano. "Stop it, people are staring."

Feliciano grinned widely. "It's just a song, Ludwig. Why not sing and be merry for once? All we need is a bottle of wine and it would be like a party!"

"A party?" Ludwig asked. "You Italians sure are strange."

"Well you Germans just don't know how to have fun," Feliciano countered, suddenly regaining his appetite. He continued humming as he ate the rest of his breakfast.

Ludwig couldn't keep his smile from his face as he finished his breakfast as well. He could already tell that the day promised to be entertaining, even if they were stuck at the base until further notice.

.

Feliciano hummed and danced and sang all afternoon, but it was just that same song the whole time. It was as if he were a broken record that only knew one song. And even though Ludwig complained about it, he enjoyed it. It was a side of Feliciano that he didn't know existed.

Though Feliciano loved being the way he was acting, he didn't realize how much trouble he would get into for it. He forgot that it showed his true age.


	4. Chapter 4

_A/N: I'm starting to feel a bit discouraged with my writing, so I have one request to make. If you enjoy my stories, could you please leave a review or shoot me a message to let me know? I just want to know that people actually like my work._

 _._

 _Mid-March, 1942, Berlin, Germany_

"Major Feliciano Vargas, report to General Roeder's office immediately," an official-sounding voice resounded over the intercom. That announcement caused all eyes in the room to fall on Feliciano, who put his head down and scurried out.

"Major Vargas," General Roeder greeted when he saw the auburn-haired boy walk into his office. "Have a seat. We need to talk."

"What is there to discuss, General?" Feliciano asked, sitting in a chair across the desk from him. "Is something wrong?"

"Yes," Roeder said. "There is something wrong." He leaned toward Feliciano a little. "How old are you, Major?"

Feliciano thought for a moment. He had lied and said he was three years older than what he really was when he joined the military. "I just turned twenty-one," he answered after what he hoped was a brief moment.

"Why did it take you so long to calculate your age?" Roeder suspiciously asked him.

The Italian gulped. "Well, my age isn't too important, is it?"

"You realize that if you lied about your age, you would be in trouble with the government, right?" Roeder questioned. "I hope you are aware of what lying can do to you here in the military."

"What can it do?" Feliciano cautiously asked. He wanted to know the answer, but at the same time he really didn't. "I swear I didn't lie." He felt that at any moment, he would be struck dead by a lightning bolt. All he had to do was wait. His lies would all catch up to him.

"For starters, depending on how big the lie was, you could get kicked out of the military. You could also get demoted. Now, Major, please tell me why you think I called you here." Roeder folded his hands under his chin and smiled daringly at the young Italian. It was a smile of ambush and mock. Feliciano didn't like it.

"To talk to me about lying to the military?" Feliciano croaked. His throat was suddenly dry and scratchy. He was parched and in desperate need of a glass of water. None of this was good. How was he going to get out of it?

"That's part of it," Roeder said with a nod. "Another part is that I believe you lied to the military about something."

"What is it that you believe I lied about?" Feliciano dared to ask. He held Roeder's gaze evenly, even though he was dying to look away. His heart was beating so fast that he could hear the blood pulsating in his ears. More than anything, he just wanted to go home to _Nonno_ and Lovino. They could always make him feel better when he was in this state. But to go home now would be to admit defeat, and Feliciano just couldn't bring himself to do that.

"I believe that you lied about your age, Major Vargas," Roeder stated. "You see, at first, you acted mature and responsible, yet now you're dancing around the base and singing like a child. What does that tell you about any suspicions I may have?"

"So you're saying you think I lied about my age to join the military?" Feliciano asked him, jawline hardening.

"That's exactly what I'm saying, Major Vargas." Roeder narrowed his eyes at Feliciano. "So you had best tell me the truth. Did you, or did you not, lie about your age to join this military?"

Feliciano was quiet for a moment. What was going to happen to him if he told the truth? He couldn't bear to think about being sent home and not being with Ludwig anymore. That was something that just couldn't happen. "Sir, with all due respect, I am twenty-one years old," he calmly stated. "I do not know where you get the idea that I am younger than what I say I am. Just because I enjoy life does not mean that I am a child. Please understand that."

Roeder was silent for a moment. "And you're sure about that?" he asked Feliciano after thinking over what he has said.

The Italian nodded. "Yes, sir," he answered. "I just try to enjoy life to its fullest. I believe that everyone should."

"I will never understand Italians," Roeder sighed. "You are dismissed."

Feliciano saluted his General and left the office. Once outside, he leaned heavily against a wall, trying to catch his breath and calm his racing heart. That was way too close! If Roeder would've found out that he was only eighteen, there would have been hell to pay. Of that, Feliciano was sure.

"Feliciano?" a familiar voice questioned. "What are you doing?"

The young Italian looked up to see Ludwig towering over him. "Oh, hi!" he cheerfully said, hoping that Ludwig wouldn't notice how pale or panicked he looked. "I just met with General Roeder. How are you?"

Ludwig eyed him suspiciously. "I am well. What happened with the General? Is everything okay? You look so pale."

"You know how nervous I get when talking to a higher ranked officer," Feliciano quickly said. "He just questioned me on some things and I gave him straight answers." He could feel the coloring returning to his face. "How about we go and have lunch?" he suggested. "I'm suddenly famished."

Ludwig chuckled to himself. "Okay, Feliciano. Let's go and eat."

Feliciano smiled widely. "Talking to Generals makes me so hungry." He then thought about what he had just said. "I mean, it makes me hungry because I'm so nervous that I probably burn a lot of fat through sweating or-"

"Let's go get lunch," Ludwig said, cutting him off. "I think you'll make more sense once we do."

The Italian smiled widely. Ludwig always knew just what to say to calm him down or shut him up whenever he was anxious about anything. For that, he was grateful. He hoped that he could stay by Ludwig's side forever.

The tall German led the way to the cafeteria while Feliciano followed after. Whenever they walked together, the walk there always seemed shorter to Feliciano. He couldn't quite understand why, though. Was it because he enjoyed his company that much? Maybe when he had more time to think about it, he would. But at that moment, all he wanted to do was just have lunch with Ludwig.

.

Later that day, Feliciano found himself doing yet another thing he wasn't supposed to be doing. He was sneaking around the part of the base where the prisoners were kept. He knew that Feliks hadn't been sent off yet, and he wanted to have one last conversation with the Polish man before that was to happen. Though he didn't know why he wanted to have that talk, he knew that it was needed to keep sane.

He crept down the narrow corridor to Feliks's cell and looked through the bars. His heart softened at the sight of the bruised and battered blond resting on his cot. One thing he did notice was that Feliks did not get the medical attention that he had insisted upon. That got his blood boiling for a moment before he realized that Feliks's eyes were opened and looking at him.

"What do you want?" Feliks weakly asked. "Come to break me even more? Well you're too late. I'm already as broken as I can get," he spat at him. "Try to take something more from me, I dare you."

Feliciano was honestly surprised at bold Feliks was being. Then he realized that Feliks really didn't have anything left to lose. He had lost his home, his love, his friends, everything. What really was left for this man to lose? His dignity had abandoned him when he was taken in by them. Was there really anything to lose after all of that?

"I didn't come to do any of that," Feliciano answered, peering in through the bars to get a better look at him.

Feliks peered back for a moment before saying, "Oh, it's the guy who wishes he could be a hero." He laughed bitterly. "Are you happy with what you see? You and your men did this to me."

Feliciano winced but tried not to let the words bother him. "Feliks, please understand that I have nothing to do with what they do to you here."

"You're still one of them," Feliks spat at him. "Please understand that you're shit, just like the rest of them. There is no way anyone will ever consider you a good man after what has been done here. You're the lowest of the low, the worst people to ever live."

"You can't just group a bunch of people together like that," Feliciano countered. "That's like saying you're just like every criminal who has ever been caught."

At that, Feliks's eyes nearly lit up with a hateful fire that Feliciano had never seen in anyone before. " _I'm not a fucking criminal!_ " he snarled at Feliciano. "The sooner you get that through your head, the sooner you can become a slightly better person!" He got up from the bed and walked over to the bars. "I did _nothing_ wrong! If loving someone more than myself is such a crime, then I'd rather die than live in this world anyway!" Feliks fell to his knees. "If you want to prove that you are a good thing, please just tell me one thing."

"And what would you like me to tell you?" Feliciano asked him, kneeling to reach his level. Everything in his inner being ached for this man, the man who had lost everything.

"Please tell me…" Feliks's voice trailed off as he became choked up with sobs. "Tell me that Toris and Raivis got away!" he blurted out, looking up with Feliciano with such a pleading expression that the Italian couldn't even find words to say for a moment. "I need to know that they got away! I need to know that my sacrifice wasn't in vain! Please tell me they got away! I'm begging you!"

Feliciano was silent for a few moments before saying, "They did. The two got away."

Feliks burst into uncontrollable sobs upon hearing that news. "They got away!" he kept muttering. "I'm so happy!" He then looked at the Major before him. "I can die happily now," he told him. "Just knowing that my love got away is enough for me to die a happy man."

The Italian found himself holding back tears. "You won't die," he told him. "I will make sure of that. I won't let them kill you. You will see Toris Laurinaitis again."

The Polish man's green eyes gazed at Feliciano with admiration and respect. "How do you know that for sure?"

"Because you did nothing wrong," Feliciano told him. "I'm like you. Not all men like us are bad people."

"Like me?" Feliks asked, confused. "How are you like me?"

Feliciano nodded, sucking in his breath. "We are both in love with a man, are we not?" He felt oddly satisfied when he saw Feliks's eyes widen in realization. "And if that will be their reason for killing you, I will not let it happen. But if you were to happen to break my trust in you and tell anyone about this conversation, I will not hesitate to kill you myself."

"Why would you do something so kind for a stranger?" Feliks asked. "Why do you want to save someone like me?"

"You said it yourself," Feliciano told him. "You did nothing wrong."

Tears flowed down Feliks's face. "Thank you." He looked up at him. "I don't even know your name…"

"I'm Major Feliciano Vargas," he told him. "And remember, if anyone hears about this conversation…."

"I know, I know," Feliks sighed. "I'm a dead man. But then again, you would be as well." He smirked evilly. "So if you let them hurt me too badly, I will tell them what your preference is as well."

Feliciano grimaced. "That's correct." He sighed. "I will not let them kill you, Feliks. Please believe me on that. And I will tell you one thing about your lover. He escaped with the American military, toward Russia."

Feliks's eyes widened. "So Toris is safe?" he asked.

"As far as I know, yes," Feliciano told him. "That should be some consolation."

"It is," Feliks sighed. "Thank you, Major Vargas. I appreciate you telling me." He frowned as he gazed down at the dirty floor of his cell. "They will be sending me away later today, from what I've heard. If you can assure that they won't immediately kill me, I will follow command."

"I will do my best," Feliciano told him. "Please just hang in there, Feliks. You'll see Toris again one day."

Feliks smiled confidently. "I will," he said. "And on that day, I'll make sure to tell him of the Major who helped me and made sure I was safe."

Feliciano's chest swelled with happiness when he heard him say that. "Thank you, Feliks." Now all he had to do was hold up his end of the bargain. If he didn't, he knew that he was a dead man as well.

.

The walk to the barracks was longer than the walk to the prisoner cells, Feliciano noted. He didn't know exactly what to suggest to Ludwig to say to General Roeder, who was in charge of what would happen to Feliks. He supposed he could lie, but what was there to say?

"Feliciano, is something on your mind?" Ludwig asked, moments before Feliciano ran into him. "You're not watching where you're going." He put his hands on Feliciano's shoulders to steady him.

"That rat!" Feliciano snarled. He looked up at Ludwig with narrowed eyes. "You'll never guess what that prisoner from Poland did! I went there to offer him the easy way out, death, and he called me a dog of the military!" He clenched his jaw to add effect. "Isn't there any way we can make it so he doesn't die but has to suffer instead? I want to make him wish he was dead!"

Ludwig's eyes widened. "I never figured you would have such vengeful thoughts, Feliciano," he said after a moment. "Why are you so offended by what a prisoner would say?"

"He pushes buttons, Ludwig," Feliciano darkly commented. "That man crosses lines that should never be crossed. I want him to suffer, not die."

The German man chuckled a little. "I'll see what I can do. Let me go talk to the General about that. We can't have prisoners insulting our officers and getting away with it." He thought for a moment. "You know, I'd like to see him suffer, too. It wouldn't be as fun if he died." Ludwig laughed to himself. "I just never thought you'd want that for anyone, Feliciano."

The truth was, he didn't. But that was the only thing Feliciano could think of to keep Feliks alive. He needed to hold up his end of the bargain after all. Sure, Feliks would have to suffer, but at least he wouldn't be killed. And that was what Feliciano had said he would do, not let his fellow soldiers kill Feliks.

"Well he pissed me off," Feliciano grumbled. His heart wasn't all that into this performance. He couldn't help but wonder how much Feliks would have to suffer for the lies he was telling. _No, Feli,_ he thought to himself. _You have to do this. It's the only way to save this man._ He clenched his fists. "He just really got my blood boiling."

"I've never seen you so angry before," Ludwig laughed. "Maybe you should get like this more often. I like the motivation it gives you."

Feliciano suddenly felt sick to his stomach at that comment, but he knew he needed to hold it all together until Ludwig went to talk to Roeder. "Motivation?" he bitterly asked. "I'm just pissed off. That's all."

Ludwig laughed more. "Well, I'll go talk to the General to see what we can do about that. After all, the fate of that prisoner is decided today." He continued chuckling to himself as he walked down the corridor.

All Feliciano could wonder at that moment was how someone could be as oblivious to the hatefulness of their actions as Ludwig was. It unnerved him. What was wrong with everyone in Germany? Why were they all so hateful? Was it how they were raised? Who in their right mind would raise their child with so much hate in their heart?

As Feliciano pondered everything, he somehow found his way to his bunk and sat on it. He really hoped that Roeder would listen to Ludwig and spare Feliks. Yet at the same time, he almost wanted Feliks to die because he knew how ruthless the German military could be to their prisoners.

He wondered where they would send Feliks. They obviously couldn't keep him at the base. He wondered if Feliks would end up at a camp. Would that be the best place for him? Considering the fact that Feliciano knew nothing about the camps, he didn't know if that would be a good environment for Feliks. Then again, Feliks wasn't supposed to be in a good environment; he was a prisoner. A prisoner who never did anything wrong.

The thought of that made Feliciano feel even more nauseous. Why would they capture and torture an innocent man just because he loved another man? It didn't make sense to him. What would happen to him if anyone were to find out he was like Feliks in that aspect? Would he be threatened with a camp or torture or even death?

"Stop thinking," Feliciano whispered to himself. "You'll never get anything accomplished if you think in such a way, Feli."

His mind then went to the older brother Ludwig had told him about. He wondered if Ludwig had a soft spot in his heart for that brother of his, even if his brother loved men. Then he wondered if Ludwig would ever love him back if he knew that he loved men.

The thought of what would happen if Ludwig would find out Feliciano's preference scared him back into reality. He clenched his blanket on his bed with both hands to focus himself on reality. There was no way he could ever tell Ludwig about it, especially after seeing Ludwig's disgust over the relationship between Feliks and Toris.

But what else could Feliciano do? His mind was jumbled with thoughts that he hadn't even thought of before. Everything was flooding into his head, and he didn't like it one bit. How would he ever sort any of it out? It wasn't like he had anyone to talk to about it. His grandfather and brother were back in Italy, and they were the only people he truly trusted with that information.

Sure, Feliciano had told Feliks, but that was to gain Feliks's trust in him. That was the only way he could get that man to trust him. But at what a cost if the trust was betrayed in any way. They would both surely be killed for it. After all, Feliciano already had a strike against him with Roeder. If anything else were to come up, especially regarding Feliks, Feliciano knew that he was dead where he stood.

Yet something about having a kindred spirit in this hateful and confusing war made Feliciano happy. All he wanted was someone who understood, someone who got it. Was it so bad to want someone who understood? Sure, Feliciano hadn't pretended to be a girl for an extended period of time, but he still knew that he and Feliks had a lot in common. And if Feliks was going to have to die for that, he couldn't just sit around and wait for everyone to figure out he was like him.

It was at that moment that Feliciano made the decision. He needed to tell Ludwig that he was like Feliks, and he would still have to face the consequences of that. But if Ludwig was as wonderful of a man as Feliciano saw him as, he wouldn't care about that little detail about his "right-hand man". In fact, Ludwig would still love and accept him for who he is, and that was all Felicano wanted.

Maybe there was still a way to put love back into Ludwig's heart.


	5. Chapter 5

_Mid-June, 1942, An Abandoned Italian Village_

Feliciano had a sinking feeling in his chest at being back in Italy after three years. He wasn't too far from his home village, either. It made his heart ache for his brother and grandfather. All he wanted to do was run home to them and never return to Germany, but that would mean leaving Ludwig, and he just couldn't do that.

"Major Vargas, aren't you from around here?" Ludwig asked him in front of the troops in the truck.

He smiled weakly. " _Si_ ," he answered. "Just past those hills way off in the distance there's a small village. That's where I'm from." His heart hurt. "Lieutenant Beilschmidt, what exactly are we doing again?"

"We're picking up some crates," Ludwig answered.

Feliciano dumbly nodded. "I see," he answered. "Why do we need so many men?"

"You never know who you will run into, Major Vargas."

.

Feliciano had separated from his group to patrol the unstable upper floor since he weighed less than the big, buff Germans. He had actually been chosen to since he was so petite. Not that he really minded that being the reason. All he wanted was a quick patrol, but something told him there was someone up there.

He walked around the rooms in the upstairs, hoping not to find anyone or anything. All he wanted was for Ludwig and the rest of the team to load up the crates while he patrolled the upstairs. Was it that hard to do?

His eyes spotted a boot sticking out from behind a pallet, and he raised his gun in a shooting stance. _Don't panic_ , he thought to himself. _The person is probably just as terrified as you are._ He inhaled deeply and circled the pallet to face the person.

"What have we here?" he mockingly asked, rounding the pallet. He froze when he saw the two men hiding behind it. Not only did he freeze, but he felt his heart shatter in his chest. His whole body went numb.

One of the two men behind the pallet sat there with his head down. He was trembling up a storm, shaking like a leaf. Feliciano instantly knew who he was by the trademark curl in his hair. It was his older brother, Lovino. But who was the man Lovino was with?

The other man looked up at Feliciano was eyes so green that Feliciano couldn't think of a proper shade for them. He froze, jaw dropping in disbelief as he looked from one brother to the other to compare them. His hand gently slapped at Lovino until he looked up.

When the brothers locked eyes, nothing more needed to be said. Feliciano knew it already. Lovino had lost all trust in him. That much was clear. There was so much betrayal and hurt in his brother's eyes. But how could Feliciano blame him? He knew it was wrong.

"F-Feli?" Lovino asked, shakily rising to his feet. Feliciano could hear the disbelief in his brother's voice, almost as if Lovino was trying to force himself to believe that they weren't on opposing sides. "W-What are you doing here?"

"L-Lovi, I'm here because…" Feliciano then thought about it for a moment. What was Lovino even doing there? This was official government business! Lovino had no business being in this warehouse with them! "Wait a minute. What are you doing here? I thought you were running the shop with _Nonno_."

His older brother shook his head. "I can't believe that you're here."

Feliciano sensed the tension and unsureness in his brother's voice. He knew that Lovino would become angry within moments, and that wasn't going to be good with Ludwig in the same warehouse. He used the same tone he addressed his troops with as he said, "You didn't answer my question, Lovino. I need to know why you're here, of all places."

"I can't tell you that," Lovino answered, staring Feliciano was obvious that there was no more trust from the older brother anymore, and that nearly broke Feliciano on the inside, but he understood why that was.

"You need to leave," Feliciano warned. "This is a military site, and you do not have permission to be here. If we were to have this encounter elsewhere, then things would be different. Since it is here, I need you to leave." He felt horrible saying that to his brother, but he knew he couldn't allow Lovino to be there and risk him being found by Ludwig or any other soldiers. They would kill him!

"What's this?" the older brother angrily demanded. "My little brother thinks he can order me around? I thought we were family."

"Family or not, you are not permitted to be here," Feliciano quickly countered. "Now please leave, Lovi." His eyes pleaded with his older brother. He didn't want any bad consequences to happen. He knew that Ludwig and the other soldiers wouldn't show mercy, even if they knew they were brothers. "If anyone else would've found you, they would've shot you on sight. Please, Lovi, just go."

Lovino crossed his arms. "Why do you insist on me leaving?" he asked Feliciano. He was just as stubborn as Feliciano remembered, which was starting to make everything even more difficult than before.

"Because you are my _fratello_ , and bad things will happen to you if you remain here any longer," Feliciano told him, pained. He knew he didn't have much more time to plead before Ludwig would come and start asking questions. "I don't want anything to happen to you. Please leave, now!"

"Major Vargas!" Ludwig called up to him. Though Feliciano once found Ludwig's voice endearing and wonderful, with Lovino around it just terrified him.

His brother opened his mouth to say something, but Feliciano quickly put his hand over it. "Yes, Lieutenant?" he called back.

"Have you come across anything?" Ludwig called, sending chills through Feliciano, yet the young Italian refused to shiver in front of his brother and the other man.

Feliciano shot Lovino a panicked look. "Nothing!" he called back, terrified that Ludwig would be able to tell he was lying through his tone.

"Keep your guard up!" the German called back, believing the lie.

"Yes, sir!" Feliciano called. He then turned back to his brother. "Please leave, _fratello_!" he begged. "I don't want you to get hurt if I know I can do something to save you. If you love me, you'll leave." That was the card he really didn't want to play, but there was no other way to make Lovino leave other than that.

Lovino smacked Feliciano's hand away from his mouth with such a strong amount of force that Feliciano knew he was over the brim with anger. "How dare you," he snarled at his little brother. "If _Nonno_ knew what you were doing, that I ran into you here, he would spend the rest of his life wondering where he went wrong with you."

Feliciano was devastated, even though deep down, he knew Lovino was right. "Please don't say that, Lovi," he softly said. "I am only serving my country. I'm just following orders."

"Do you even know what you're doing here?" Lovino asked him, gesturing to the room around them. "You're here to take the artwork that our country prides itself in. You should be pretty fucking ashamed of yourself, Feli. We were raised better than that."

"B-But Ludwig said we're just patrolling," Feliciano stammered. He couldn't believe he was lying to Lovino. He knew they were taking the crates, but he didn't know it was Italian artwork in them. Feliciano felt instantly sick to his stomach.

"You always were naive," Lovino commented. He glared at his little brother. "Let me guess, you're following this German's commands because you're in love with him?"

"Lovino, stop," Feliciano pleaded. He wished that Lovino didn't know him that well. Was it that obvious that he loved Ludwig? "You don't know what you're talking about." Though he knew that his brother knew exactly what he was talking about...

"Like hell I do," Lovino snarled at his brother. He looked down at the man with him. "Get up, Antonio," he said. "We're fucking leaving." In his anger, he pointed an accusing finger in his brother's face. "But if you even _think_ I will ever forgive you for this, then you're terribly mistaken."

Feliciano suddenly embraced his older brother and kissed both of his cheeks in relief. " _Grazie, fratello_ ," he said, breathing a sigh of relief. "Now go, hurry!" He tried to rush Lovino away.

Lovino shoved Feliciano away. "Get off of me," he groaned and pushed past his brother. "We're leaving, Antonio."

"But, Lovino, we can't-" the man began, speaking up for the first time throughout the whole thing. He had an accent, which Feliciano recognized as Spanish.

" _We're leaving_ ," Lovino snarled at the Spaniard.

"Let me walk with you," Feliciano said. "I can get you out undetected." He wanted to spend more time with his brother, even if Lovino hated him.

Lovino groaned. "Whatever…"

When the three men came upon the rickety bridge that Feliciano had crossed earlier, Lovino looked down and whistled low. It was quite the drop if that narrow, old bridge were to break at all. Feliciano, though he wasn't too scared, held his breath as they all began to cross it, Lovino first.

As they neared the end of the bridge, there was a loud creak. Lovino stepped off of the bridge, followed by Antonio, but when he turned around, Feliciano was standing still on the bridge. The creaking began to grow louder.

"Feli, what are you doing?" Lovino asked. "Get off the bridge! It's going to break!"

Feliciano looked up at Lovino with frightened eyes. He had never felt more terrified in his life. And for the first time that day, he couldn't keep his voice down any longer. "I can't! It'll break if I take one more step!"

"But it'll also break if you don't move," Lovino insisted. He stood on the edge of the bridge and reached his hands out toward his little brother. "Here, grab my hands. I'll help you."

The younger Italian reached out toward his brother as the bridge gave way beneath him. His hands clung to the part of the bridge that wasn't broken as he kicked his feet in panic. "Lovi!" he cried out. "Lovi, help me!"

Feliciano's heart raced in his chest. He knew it right then and there. He was going to fall. There was no way Lovino was going to get to him in time, especially with the looks the Spaniard was suddenly giving him.

Lovino made a move to get to his brother, but the Spaniard suddenly grabbed him and held him back. "What are you doing?!" Lovino shouted at the Spaniard. "Let go of me! That's my little brother! I have to help him! Let go! He's going to fall if I don't help him! Let go of me!" He struggled against his grasp, but the Spaniard was much stronger than him. "Let go! I have to help Feli!"

"It's too dangerous," the other man insisted. "You'll fall, too! My main priority is keeping you safe, Lovino!"

"Let go of me!" Lovino shouted, voice echoing off the walls. Within moments, Ludwig and the other troops would come running, but no one seemed to care. All that was on Lovino's mind was rescuing his little brother.

The Spaniard began to drag Lovino from the bridge. "We need to go," he stated. "And we need to go now, Lovino."

"I can't leave him!" Lovino cried out as he noticed Feliciano's fingers slipping. "Please, Antonio! Let me help my _fratello_!" He fought against him, but the other man was too strong.

Feliciano felt his hands slip. He began to fall, losing all track of time and space around him. Everything blurred before him and he began to see his life flash before his eyes: afternoons with _Nonno_ and Lovi when he was a child, joining the military, those secret conversations when he and Ludwig used their first names to address each other. Was this really going to be the last thing he was ever going to have happen to him?

He didn't even feel himself land. Everything just went black instead.

.

" _Mein gott!_ " Ludwig cried out when they found Feliciano's crumpled body on the floor in a pool of blood. "Someone get the medics _now_!"

Soldiers ran off in many different directions; some after Lovino and the Spaniard and some running for a medic for the fallen Major. That left Ludwig alone with Feliciano, wonder what had happened and who had done this to him. Whoever did it was going to pay.

"Feliciano," he softly said to the unconscious Major, "I swear I will find the man who did this to you, and I will make him pay. Perhaps even with his own life." He stared down at his friend, his mangled legs, wishing there was something he could do for him. Never in his life had he felt more useless. "I swear to you that I'll do it."

The young Major began to cough and wheeze, startling Ludwig. His eyes looked up into Ludwig's face, but it wasn't his Lieutenant he saw in his fevered delusion. It was Lovino.

"You came back for me," he softly said, smiling weakly up at him. "That makes me so happy."

"Came back?" Ludwig asked, confused.

"I thought the Spaniard took you away, but you _really_ came back for me, Lovi!" Feliciano weakly enthused. He closed his eyes, still smiling, as he lost consciousness once more.

"Lovi?" Ludwig asked himself. "Who the hell is Lovi?" He looked back down at the bloody Major. "Feliciano, why are you so strange?" His brow furrowed in worry. And what did he mean by coming back? Was it this 'Lovi' who did this to him?

.

Two days later, Feliciano woke up in the infirmary of the base. He felt so hot, burning with fever. His body was drenched in sweat, which he felt _must_ be a good thing. Maybe his fever was breaking. He looked around him at the white walls and felt as if he were going mad. The color white was too plain and made him crave color.

"You're awake!" he heard someone gasp next to his bed.

Feliciano looked over to see Ludwig sitting next to him. His eyes flew open wide. "Lieutenant Beilschmidt!" he exclaimed in surprise. "What are you doing here? What day is it? Did everything go as planned?"

He couldn't remember anything about the mission, really. His memory was so fuzzy. The only thing he really seemed to remember was that Lovino was there, but that couldn't be a real memory. That was probably just part of the delusion that he had been living in his state of unconsciousness.

"No," Ludwig answered, shaking his head. "Feliciano, you…" His voice trailed off. He didn't know where to go from there. "Something went terribly wrong."

"What happened?" he asked. "We didn't screw up like we did in Poland again, did we?" He groaned and then his eyes somehow managed to get even wider. "It wasn't my fault again, was it?"

Ludwig kept his mouth shut tight in a thin line for a moment. "You got into a terrible accident, Feliciano," he finally said after a deafening silence that seemed to last forever.

"That's ridiculous," Feliciano said, patting his legs. He then noticed something weird. He heard his handfalls, but he just couldn't feel them. "Ludwig…" he softly said. "Why can't I feel my legs?" His gaze only held fear as he looked over at the German man. "No, this can't be real! Please tell me why I can't feel my legs!"

The Lieutenant looked away. "The doctor said you might never walk again."

Feliciano's eyes widened in terror. He could feel the tears pricking in the corners, but he couldn't let himself cry in front of Ludwig. "No…" He let the word hang there between them like the elephant in the room.

"I have to walk again," he said after what seemed like forever. "I have to, Ludwig."

"And what if you don't?" the Lieutenant asked him.

Feliciano shook his head. "I can't accept failure like that."

Ludwig felt himself half-smile. "That's right, Feliciano. You can't."

And for the first time in awhile, Feliciano started to feel hopeful.

.

That evening when Ludwig brought Feliciano's evening meal in, he sat next to the bed instead of leaving like he did at lunch. Feliciano was confused. Ludwig obviously had a reason to sit there, but he couldn't figure out what the Lieutenant wanted.

"Is something bothering you, Ludwig?" Feliciano asked him.

"Who is Lovi?" Ludwig suddenly blurted out.

Feliciano froze while reaching for his fork. All time seemed to stop for a moment. How did he know about Lovi? Had he mentioned him during his delirious moments? This wasn't good. Why was he even asking about his brother? This was getting too personal.

"Why?" Feliciano asked him, caution in his voice.

"You mention him in your delirium," Ludwig answered. "We have reason to believe that he is the one who did this to you."

"That's not true!" Feliciano suddenly shouted. "Lovi didn't do anything to me!" He grabbed the fork and clenched it tightly in his fist, facing Ludwig.

"Put the fork down," Ludwig slowly said. "Feliciano, there is no need to get so defensive. Please calm down. I just need to know who Lovi is."

"Why are you talking about Lovi?" Feliciano asked him. "You don't know him. You have no right to talk about him." He frowned and turned back to the tray in front of him. "I'm not hungry anymore."

"Feliciano, you need to eat something," Ludwig answered. "Please, just a little bit."

"No," the Italian told him. "I don't want to eat anything you give me."

"We won't talk about him if you eat."

Feliciano looked over at Ludwig. "We won't talk about him ever again," he snarled at Ludwig. "My brother's name will never again emerge from your lips."

Ludwig's eyes widened in realization that Lovi was Feliciano's brother, but he still nodded. " _Ja_ ," he agreed. "Now eat."

With that, Feliciano picked up the fork and began to slowly eat, glaring daggers at Ludwig between bites.


	6. Chapter 6

_A/N: As always, please read and review! I appreciate hearing what people like about my stories!_

.

Feliciano didn't feel motivated by the end of his fourth day in bed. He wanted to get up and walk around, but he wasn't strong enough. Luckily, he had regained feeling in his legs. He had found out that the doctors had just been numbing them so he couldn't feel the pain of having both of them broken before putting the plaster casts on them to heal them.

The young Italian had cried out in agony as the German surgeons had worked on his legs and finally set them to heal. It had hurt so badly, but he knew that if he had followed the doctor's orders, he would be able to walk again. That was too big of a chance to take, so he knew he would be bed-ridden for awhile unless if someone were to push him around in a wheelchair.

Feliciano sighed, frowning. He knew he had chased off Ludwig the night he had gotten mad at him for talking about Lovino. His eyes would always be expecting Ludwig whenever the door opened, and he would always be disappointed to find that the dashing Lieutenant wasn't there. He wondered if he had chased away his only friend in that military.

"Way to go, Feli," he softly told himself one night. "You're never going to see him again…" He sighed deeply, feeling sad, alone, and scared. But why was he scared? "Why did you have to be so hateful to him? Now you don't have any more friends. Why can't you just be nice to people?" He punched at the mattress. "You can't do anything right!"

The door opened and a familiar voice softly asked, "Feliciano?"

Feliciano quickly stopped what he was doing and looked up at Ludwig. "Ludwig?" he asked in disbelief. "What are you doing here? I thought you were mad at me."

"No," Ludwig answered, shaking his head. He stepped into the room and closed the door after him. His feet carried him over to Feliciano's bed as he sat on the edge. "I requested to keep you on my squadron," he told the Italian.

"But why?" Feliciano asked. "I'm completely useless. What if I never walk again?"

"I'm sure there will be other things you can be useful for," Ludwig stated with a shrug.

"Ludwig…" Feliciano bit his lip. He thought about what Lovino had said to him. "Are we heroes?"

Ludwig was quiet for a moment, a look of pure confusion on his face. "Of course we are, Feliciano. Why would you ask something like that?"

"Then why is everyone so disappointed in me?" Feliciano asked him, daring to look into his sky-blue eyes. "Why is everyone telling me that I'm not?"

"Who is telling you that?" the German angrily demanded, hands clenching into fists. "Just because you were injured in the line of duty does not make you any less of a hero than anyone else."

"That's not what I mean," the Italian timidly answered. He looked down. "Feliks told me I'll never be a hero for the things I've done…"

"Don't listen to a word any prisoner says," Ludwig commanded. "Do you hear me, Feliciano? Don't listen to a thing any prisoner will ever tell you. You are a hero to everyone who was there that day."

"Not everyone," Feliciano softly said.

"What do you mean?"

"Do you think my grandfather would be proud of me?" Feliciano couldn't hold Ludwig's gaze any longer and stared down into his lap. "Lovi said he wouldn't be."

"When did Lovi say this?" Ludwig asked him.

Feliciano, forgetting that he had requested not to speak of his brother, answered, "At the warehouse." Tears fell from his eyes. "He told me that _Nonno_ would be wondering where he went wrong with me if he knew that I was there and what I was there for. Lovi and I are now enemies, and I wish it didn't have to be that way."

"I understand," was all Ludwig could respond with. " _Mein_ brother and I are enemies as well. It is hard to be on opposing sides, isn't it?"

"It's so hard," Feliciano softly answered. He looked back up at Ludwig with a tearful and sorrowful expression. "Do you think my family will ever forgive me for the things I did wrong?"

"You did nothing wrong," Ludwig told him, lips pulling into a kind smile.

"But I did," Feliciano said. "Ludwig, what we're doing, some of it is wrong." He looked down at his blanket as his hands fiddled with the ends of it. "I can't explain it, but it is. Like what we did to Feliks. That was wrong. He never did anything wrong to anyone."

"He lied," Ludwig stated.

"But what would his crime have been if he hadn't lied to save himself?" Feliciano suddenly demanded, looking up at his friend. "The fact that he loved someone who was like him, another man?" He sighed. "That's not a crime, Ludwig. Loving someone is not a crime."

"Why does it even matter so much to you, Feliciano?" Ludwig asked him, clenching his jaw. "The prisoner was rude to you anyway."

"Because he didn't deserve any sort of punishment for doing nothing wrong," Feliciano answered. "It's fucked what happened to him, okay? It's fucked." He frowned and looked up at Ludwig's puzzled expression. "I just….I can't live with myself, knowing that I did something like that."

"Knowing that you did what?" Ludwig asked.

 _Knowing that I'm the reason that a homosexual man like me is suffering while I still get to live a nice life._ Feliciano shook his head. "It's nothing. Thank you for coming to visit me, Ludwig. I was fearing that you wouldn't after my hostility the last time…"

Ludwig shook his head. "It would take a lot more than that to make me not come see a friend," he answered. "But I'm afraid I won't be able to stay too much longer. I only came to check on how you're doing. I will come back tomorrow when I have more time, though."

"Please do." The Italian stared blankly before him. "I would enjoy some company."

"I figure you would. I'm sorry I haven't come by these past few days. I've been looking around for some things, and I might have found what I'm looking for." He smiled a mischievous smile to the young Major. "Who knows?" Ludwig stood. "I will see you tomorrow, Feliciano. Please get some rest and try not to think too far into what's going on right now. Just try to focus on healing."

"Thank you," Feliciano muttered to him. "I'll try." He watched Ludwig walk out the door and couldn't help but wonder just how brainwashed that German man really was.

.

Ludwig stopped outside of the infirmary and leaned heavily against the wall. What did Feliciano mean by not being a hero. Of course they were being heroic. They were doing what they were supposed to be doing. Everything was going the way it was supposed to be going. What wasn't heroic about that?

He then thought about that prisoner, Feliks. What did happen to him, he wondered. Surely nothing too harsh. After all, it was true that he didn't really do anything wrong. Surely he wouldn't get that bad of a punishment.

It was true that he had gone to his superiors and questioned what had happened to Feliks just days before. They had answered that it was classified information but that he was now just serving his time in a more reasonable place. Ludwig had forced himself to believe that it was a good thing, but now after his and Feliciano's conversation he began to wonder if it really was a good thing. Was Feliks actually dead? Did they kill him?

What if Feliciano was right? What if they really weren't the heroes that everyone made them out to be? What if they were just lapdogs of the military like Feliks had said? Was Felikis right?

He shuddered, no longer wanting to think about it. There was no way he couldn't consider himself a bad guy. He was a hero, dammit. That's what he had to be. He had done too much not to be. If anything, he was noble, and wasn't that what a hero was? Noble?

"Dammit!" he hissed, pounding his fist against the cement wall of the base. "Dammit, Feliciano! Why did you have to run into your brother there?" He squeezed his eyes shut. "If he hadn't been there, none of this would have happened!" His frustration got the best of him as he pounded the wall once more. "Dammit!"

Ludwig sank against the wall, holding his head in his hands. What was going on? Why did he care so much about what Feliciano thought anyway? Why did his opinion matter so much? It wasn't like Feliciano was that important anyway. He was only one person.

He raised his head as he thought about it. Why was Feliciano so important? The more he thought about it, the more confused he became. Why did he go and visit Feliciano? Why did he care that Feliciano was lonely? Why did he demand to have Feliciano on his squadron, even after the many times Feliciano had messed up? Even if Feliciano was crippled, Ludwig still wanted him. But why?

"Get over yourself, Ludwig," the German hissed to himself. "You need to stay calm." He rose to his feet and headed to the barracks of the base. Maybe one day things would start making sense.

.

 _Mid-August, 1942, Berlin, Germany_

There was a wild commotion during Feliciano's physical therapy one afternoon. A batallion had just returned from a mission, and from the sound of it, they had just gained a new prisoner. Feliciano grimaced, hating the fact that they had a new POW, but he pretended it had to do with his leg.

"Now, Major Vargas, drop your cane and take two laps around the room," the instructor told him. "After that, you're free to go."

Feliciano groaned, but he did as told. His right leg had healed right up. He had no troubles with it at all. His left leg was another story... Something had gone wrong in the healing process, and he was almost certain he'd have a limp for the rest of his life. But at least he had proven himself. He was still walking.

On his way out of the physical therapy room, Feliciano saw the soldiers dragging their new prisoner by. The man looked oddly familiar, though he was beaten up and battered. He had curly, dark hair and green eyes. Feliciano only wished that he could remember where he had seen that man before.

He frowned and looked away, unable to look at the man any longer until a soldier called out, "Major Vargas, come with us! We're going to put him in his cell!"

The prisoner's head instantly snapped up when they had called out to Feliciano. His eyes were wide as Feliciano saw him mouth, "Vargas."

When the two locked eyes, everything came back to Feliciano. He remembered the man. He was the Spaniard who was with Lovino! He was there when Feliciano had fallen and broken his legs! This was the man who wouldn't let Lovino help him!

Feliciano felt a spark of instant rage at the memory of the man holding back his brother from helping him. He spat at the Spaniard's feet. "I refuse," he told the other soldiers. "But _danke_ for the offer." His bronze eyes held the Spaniard's gaze with a hard glare as the Spaniard's eyes just held a look of horror and distress.

He wanted to feel bad for the man, but he just couldn't bring himself to, even as he watched the soldiers drag him down the hallway. Normally, Feliciano didn't hold grudges, but this was one he couldn't help but hold. If that man hadn't been there, Feliciano would never have fallen. He never would have broken his legs. And Lovino never would have said those nasty things to him.

.

That night, Feliciano managed to sneak out of the barracks and to the prison cells. He wanted to have a word with the new prisoner, one-on-one. He wanted to know why the Spaniard had held Lovino back. But most importantly, he wanted to know about his family.

He walked along the prison cells until he came across the Spaniard's. It was labeled "Antonio Fernandez Carriedo". What a mouthful of a name. Feliciano cringed when he saw that Antonio was awake and staring at him through the bars.

"So you come at night and pretend to be a good guy? Is that it?" Antonio bitterly asked him. "You are nothing like what they think you are."

"Who do you speak of?" Feliciano asked, standing in front of the bars. He had a pretty good idea, but he wanted to hear it from the Spaniard himself.

"Your family," the prisoner bitterly replied. "Lovi and Roma speak so highly of you, and yet you spit on your prisoners. What has the military done to you. I've heard stories about you, you know."

"And what have you heard?" Feliciano asked, trying not to let his voice waver. It hurt that Antonio was now closer with his own family than he was, but he didn't want to let on how betrayed he felt.

"I heard stories of how kind and cheerful you _used to be_ ," Antonio bitterly answered. "If only Roma could see you now."

Feliciano put his hands to his ears. "Stop saying that," he snarled at him. "That's all I hear is Lovi saying that, echoing in my head. I don't need to hear you say it too."

"Well it's true," the Spaniard snarled back. "This isn't the Feliciano your family knows, and you know that. What are you going to do when the war is over? You can't return to them like this. They'll wonder what happened to their sweet, little Feli." He locked eyes with the Italian, glaring. "Don't worry, it's not like Lovi or I even have the heart to tell Roma what you have become."

"And what have I become?" the younger man demanded. "What am I?"

"A monster," Antonio answered. "A cold-hearted German monster. You're just like those men who throw the Jews into the prison camps."

"Prison camps?" Feliciano asked.

"Don't tell me you don't know about those," he sighed. "You're so naive, Feli."

"What do they do at the camps?" the Italian demanded, remembering that Feliks was sent to one.

"They kill them," Antonio answered. "Either they put them in a chamber, or they work them in hard labor until they die or kill themselves."

Feliciano's face fell. How had he not known about that? "How do I know what you even say is true? We're on opposing sides."

"Your grandfather told me all about it. He's got all the information on it," Antonio stated. "You know he's joining the Resistance, right?"

"No," Feliciano softly said. "He can't! If he does, he could get killed. He could get captured and end up here."

"And what a fucking wonderful family reunion that would turn out being, huh?" Antonio sarcastically asked. "They almost got Lovi today, you know."

Feliciano felt his stomach drop. If they had gotten Lovino, everyone would have known they were brothers. He felt sick and nearly vomited on spot. "Please don't tell me things like that."

"He misses you, you know," Antonio told him, guessing that he had gone too far. "Every day, he reads over the last letter you sent him and Roma. You're always on his mind. He still holds onto the fact that when you were children, you chose him as your favorite person. Lovino treasures everything about you."

"He does?" Feliciano asked in awe. "Even though he hates me?"

"Lovino hating you?" Antonio asked. "I doubt he could ever hate you, Feli. Now Lovi hating me, that happens on an almost hourly basis."

Feliciano felt himself chuckling at the Spaniard's words. That was so much like Lovi. He didn't feel the need to ask about why Antonio didn't let Lovino help him anymore. Instead, he wanted to talk more about his brother with someone else who understood, and that was exactly what he did for the next hour.

"Antonio, I have a question," Feliciano finally asked after an hour of talking about Lovino.

"What's that?" Antonio asked, a smile upon his face.

"Do you love my brother?" Feliciano inspected his expression as the Spaniard's face seemed to get a dreamy look to it.

"I love him far more than words can ever say," Antonio finally said after a long pause. "At first, I wasn't so sure about him. He is quite temperamental. But when I found out that I was the one he adored, it made me happy. It feels good to be liked by someone who seems to hate everyone."

Feliciano nodded in agreement. "It does," he agreed. "My brother really does hate everyone, but I'm glad that he loves you."

"You know, so do I," Antonio said. He smiled. "I think I'm going to try to get some rest. You should probably do so as well. I enjoyed talking to you, Feliciano. Let's do it again sometime if you're ever able."

"I will do my best," Feliciano told him. "Goodnight, Antonio."

" _Buenas noches_ , Feliciano."

.

That night, Feliciano dreamed of his brother. He dreamed that he and Lovino were walking through a meadow just outside of their village. Ludwig and Antonio were there as well. Ludwig was walking by Feliciano's side, and Antonio by Lovino's. Feliciano didn't even have to use his cane, but his limp was still evident.

"It's such a nice day!" Feliciano cheered happily. "Look, Lovi! Those clouds up there are forming a cat!"

"Feli, why are you such a child at times?" Lovino sighed to his brother. He couldn't help but glance up at the clouds and notice that they indeed resembled a cat. The corners of his lips tugged into a smile.

"Lovi's smiling!" Antonio exclaimed, laughing.

"Shut up," Lovino scoffed, elbowing Antonio in the ribs. "It's not funny."

Feliciano noticed that Lovino didn't call Antonio a bastard, which was what he usually called everyone. It seemed a little off to him. Maybe it was real. Maybe Lovino really did love Antonio back.

Ludwig cleared his throat uncomfortably. "Those clouds form a dog," he said, pointing to another cloud formation, trying to fit in with the others. He knew he was the odd one out, but at least he was trying for Feliciano.

"But cats are better," Feliciano answered, hooking his arm into the crook of Ludwig's. He smiled up at the blond. "I see the dog, though. It looks cute."

"Cute," Ludwig scoffed, but his mouth formed into a smile.

As Feliciano slept on, he knew that was the way things should be. There should be no war, and everyone should be able to love who they wanted. They should be friends with whomever they wanted, and be able to do whatever they wanted.

He frowned when he woke up, disappointed that it was only a dream.


	7. Chapter 7

_A/N: So many old people were looking over my shoulder at the end of this chapter while I was writing it! It was sooooo awkward! They were like, "What are you writing there, sonny boy?" Please enjoy and review if you can!_

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Feliciano walked around the base the next day as if he were someone important, but really, he felt more homesick than anything after talking to Antonio. If anything, all he wanted was to get that Spaniard away from him so he wouldn't be tempted to talk about his family any longer and just get back to what was now his normal life in the military. Though he hated that that was how he now viewed the hateful thing he did every day, what else was there to call it?

There was nothing Feliciano could do to change the actions of the things that he did to those people before he saw the light of what his military was doing, and there was no way he could escape the military now. They could easily hunt him down and do to him what they did to everyone they had imprisoned so far. It wasn't fair, but it was what life was at that point in time for Feliciano.

The young Major sighed and continued walking toward the cafeteria. Things seemed different those days. He wasn't really as brave as he used to be. It was as if his mind did a complete 180 degree flip. Feliciano was finding it harder and harder to stand up to Ludwig and his suggestions and even harder to look people like General Roeder in the eye. He found himself becoming more and more timid, and he didn't like it. What was going on?

Feliciano shook those thoughts from his head. He couldn't afford to be thinking that way. There were so many more important matters, like how he was going to fix that limp of his. If he couldn't fix that limp, he might not be able to go on missions anymore, which meant that he wouldn't be able to spend as much time with Ludwig. Just the thought of that broke Feliciano's heart and built up a raging fire inside of him to get better.

Ludwig was waiting for him at their usual table. " _Guten morgen_ , Feliciano," he greeted with a nod.

The young Italian knew enough German to know what that meant. "And a good morning to you as well, Ludwig," he greeted back. He sat down across from the Lieutenant, feeling his heart pounding madly in his chest. Why did he always get this way around Ludwig? Couldn't his emotions just give him at least a tiny break around his handsome superior officer?

"How are you feeling today?" Ludwig asked. "You seem to be recovering well from what I can tell."

"I do?" Feliciano asked, blinking his eyes in surprise. Had Ludwig really been noting his recovery? Did that mean Ludwig was noticing little things about him. "I mean, I feel as if I'm recovering well, but you've noticed, too?"

"Of course I have noticed," Ludwig answered. "Our whole squadron has noticed. We all want you to get better so you can come back and join us. They miss you on mission, Feliciano."

He blinked in surprise once more. "They do?"

"I wouldn't lie to you," the German told him. His mouth twisted into a small smirk, which was the closest to a smile that Feliciano had ever seen on Ludwig's mouth other than in his dreams. "You are a strong leader, Feliciano. We need you back."

Feliciano bowed his head in shame. He didn't feel so strong anymore, and he felt that if Ludwig knew how he felt, he would consider the young Italian useless and kick him from the squadron. There was no way he could acknowledge his true feelings on his strength. He needed to stay with Ludwig at all costs, no matter how much it terrified him.

"Then I will come back stronger than ever," Feliciano answered. He looked up and saw the proud smile of triumph on Ludwig's face, and in that moment, he knew that he couldn't back down from his words.

.

That night, Feliciano crept back to the cells where the prisoners were kept, desperate to speak to Antonio once more. He knew that he had to get the Spaniard out of there, but he needed a plan and maybe Antonio could help him with one. After all, Lovino was the mastermind when Feliciano was growing up. Feliciano just followed his brother's orders.

"Hey, Antonio, are you awake?" he asked, grabbing the bars of his cell. He prayed deep down that Antonio would be awake so they could talk. All he wanted was to get Antonio out of there so his life would go back to the way it was without someone to report it to his family. His stomach churned as he thought of Antonio reporting everything so far to Lovino and Roma. It was something that he couldn't take, making his legs shake.

" _Si_ ," Antonio yawned from inside the cell. "I'm awake. It's you, isn't it, Feliciano?" He walked over to the bars and peered through them at the young Italian with his blazing, green eyes. "What can I do for you? Or did you come to talk more about Lovino?"

"Do you think we look alike?" Feliciano asked him. "Lovi and me, I mean. We were told all our lives that we look nearly identical. Do you think that as well?"

Antonio seemed to be thinking for a moment before answering. "You two look similar, but you give off completely different auras. Lovino gives off the aura that makes you want to stay away, but you give off a more positive and cheerful aura. It's a little complicated to explain."

"So which do you like more?" Feliciano asked Antonio, making eyes at him through the bars. "Me or Lovi?" He knew he had to do this to test Antonio's loyalty to Lovino. If Antonio wasn't loyal to Lovino, it wasn't even going to be worth busting him out.

"Feliciano, why are you doing this?" Antonio calmly asked him, a hint of annoyance in his voice. "This isn't fair to your brother, and you know it. There is no way I would answer with you. My heart belongs to Lovino, and you know that. Why test it? Why do you have to test my love for Lovino? Are you trying to prove my worth or something? Go ahead then. I'm not going to fall in love with you, Feli. It's not going to happen. My heart belongs to another, and you're never going to change that."

The young Italian smiled and leaned back, holding onto the bars for support like a child. "Ah, that's exactly what I wanted to hear, Antonio," he chuckled. "I wanted to know that you love Lovino and that I couldn't change that. Not even if I seduce you?" he asked for good measure.

"Not even if you were naked before me and begging me to fuck you," Antonio confirmed with a nod. "I just wouldn't be able to do it."

Feliciano was glad that Antonio couldn't see how red his face was at what he had just said. "That's good to know," he answered quietly. "I'm glad to hear that." He looked down at the lock on the cell. "Hey, you're not a bad guy, are you?"

"I'm not," Antonio answered. "I just happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time."

"That's what I thought," the Italian sighed. "How about I do something for you?"

"Like what?" Antonio asked.

"Tomorrow night, I'll let you go," Feliciano quietly said, speaking slowly as he decided it. "I will sneak you out of here as best as I can. But please, don't ever tell anyone that it was me, not even my family. This is treason, but you did nothing wrong." He thought back to Feliks, and how he should have done it for the poor Polish man, but everyone would have known it was him. Considering no one knew he spoke to Antonio, this would be simpler. "Return to my family since I can't."

"I don't want you putting yourself at risk for me," Antonio argued.

"My mind is already made up," Feliciano told him. "Just let me do it." His stomach was in knots. He knew there was no way he would be able to eat tomorrow, knowing that he would be betraying the military, betraying _Ludwig_ , tomorrow night. "You need to go back to them. You need to get out of here before they get you."

"Before who gets me?" The Spaniard's eyes widened.

" _Them_ ," the Italian emphasized. "The SS!"

Antonio's eyes widened at the sudden severity of the situation. "They're coming here?"

"They think you're with the resistance," Feliciano quickly explained. "And they will do anything to get the information that they want from you." He looked down at his feet. "Don't tell them anything, especially about my family. If you do, I will never forgive you." His eyes held a dark aura about them as he glared at the Spaniard. "Do I make myself clear?"

Antonio nodded. "Perfectly." He was silent for a moment, and Feliciano could tell he was obviously terrified. "When do you think they'll come?"

"Unfortunately, I have no idea," the Italian admitted. "They may come tomorrow or another day. I'm hoping the latter." He bit his lip, not wanting to see Antonio after being tortured by the SS.

"Yeah," Antonio softly answered. "So am I." It was obvious that the Spaniard was terrified of the fact that the SS was coming at some point, but even more terrified that no one knew when. It was one of those feelings that chilled you deep into your core, making your bones feel like ice. "The SS are a terrifying force."

"You've got that right," Feliciano sighed. Personally, he didn't like them either. They gave off a weird aura about them that made him antsy and uncomfortable. He avoided them whenever possible. In fact, he didn't really know many people who felt comfortable around them, other than superior officers like Ludwig and Roeder.

"So tomorrow night then?" Antonio asked.

Feliciano nodded. "Tomorrow night," he stated, and then he left without another word. Although he was dying to talk about his family, he still needed to formulate a strategy. And who knew? If all went well tomorrow night, Feliciano may have a chance to speak with Antonio again on better terms, and possibly even with his family present.

.

That night, Feliciano walked the halls and found every exit he could, monitoring how many people walked past him and the like, noting who was up at what times and where they were. He was studying everything around him to make sure that he could guarantee a safe escape for Antonio. It was the least he could do for the Spaniard, who seemed to be the only person who had ever truly loved Lovino so much.

All Feliciano could think was that this was going to be a more difficult process than he thought it was going to be. How the hell was he supposed to sneak a grown man out of this dungeon? His mind began to spin in circles as he sighed, sitting against a wall. There were so many possibilities of what to do tomorrow night. He needed to make sure that he wouldn't get caught at all while taking Antonio through there. Mostly, he just needed Antonio to cooperate with him. That way, everything would go smoothly.

"Feliciano, what are you doing out here?" Ludwig asked. He sat against the wall next to the young Italian. "Do you even know how late it is?" Ludwig chuckled to himself and smiled over at his Italian friend. "What brings you to this hallway? It's so far from the bunks."

The Italian shrugged. "There is so much going on in my head tonight," he answered indifferently. "I just needed some time to think, so I started to wander. My mind can be a difficult place to be at times." Feliciano sighed and leaned over heavily onto his friend. "Save me, Ludwig. There are too many things going on at once."

Ludwig half-smiled down at Feliciano. "What kinds of things are going on in your head?" he kindly asked. "Let me into that strange, little head of yours for once."

"You really want into my head?" Feliciano asked him. "How badly?"

He heart began to race from being so close to Ludwig. Maybe this moment would be a perfect time to test the waters with the man he loved. His hand slowly found its way to Ludwig's knee, knowing that no one was going to walk into this hallway and find them.

"How badly?" Ludwig echoed back. He thought for a moment. "Why not let me in? Maybe if you told me some of the things going on in your head, I could help you."

"Oh, you think so?" Feliciano asked, grinning up at Ludwig. A light blush dusted his cheeks. He wanted to feel those soft-looking, pink lips on his and wondered what he would have to do in order to experience it. His eyes wouldn't tear away from Ludwig's lips, no matter what he tried to think of other than those thoughts.

"What makes you think I couldn't?" Ludwig asked. He switched positions to make himself more comfortable, slipping an arm around his Italian friend, thinking nothing of it. All he hoped was that Feliciano would open up to him, knowing that the young Major didn't open up to anyone else.

Feliciano thought for a moment. "You make a valid point," he finally stated. "Okay, so I'm thinking about that prisoner, Feliks, once again."

"You tend to think about him a lot," the German mused. "Why do you do that?" He couldn't understand why Feliciano thought about Feliks so much. What made him think of Feliks anyway? What was so special about that weird, Polish man anyway? The man dressed like a woman! "It's not like he was anyone special."

"But he was," Feliciano answered, voice quiet. "You see, Feliks taught me a lot about life in just the short amount of time that I knew him." He fell silent for a moment. "Ludwig?"

" _Ja?_ "

"What happened to him?" the Italian dared to ask. He feared the answer, expecting only the worst. Feliks was dead, he just knew it.

"He's just doing some heavy labor," Ludwig answered with a sigh. "Do not worry, Feliciano. He isn't dead as far as I know."

Feliciano's eyes widened. "Really?" he asked, struggling to keep the hope from his voice. "Why didn't anyone tell me?"

"I think it's because of how passionate you got about him getting medical treatment during that one meeting where I was forced to cover for you, in case you forgot about it," Ludwig sighed. He glanced over at Feliciano. "But yes, as far as I know, he is still alive and doing rather well. I do, in fact, check on him every now and then for your sake."

The Italian squeezed his knee without realizing it. "You really do?" he asked, bronze eyes shining. "That's amazing! No one has ever done something so kind for me!"

"Though I will never understand why he means so much to you, I have taken it upon myself to make sure nothing too bad will happen to him," Ludwig sighed. He then looked back down at the Major. "Oh, please. Don't look at me like that, Feliciano. It's making me feel strange."

"What kind of strange?" Feliciano cautiously asked him.

"I don't know," the German answered after a moment. His voice came out slowly. "It's making me feel some kind of floating feeling in my abdomen. It's hard to explain." He was quiet for a moment. "Do you understand that feeling? Have you ever had it?"

All Feliciano could do was nod up at his superior officer. "Do you know what you need to do to get rid of it?" he asked the Lieutenant, never breaking eye contact. He made sure to keep his tone perfectly clear and serious as well.

"What do I need to do?" Ludwig asked him, eyebrows rising in concern.

"You need to experiment with it," Feliciano answered. "Do you like the strange feeling?"

"I guess so," the other man answered with a shrug. "I don't know. I've never had it before." His heart began to pound as Feliciano's hand slipped from his knee and began to slowly drift up his leg. "Major Vargas, what are you doing?"

Feliciano put a finger to his Lieutenant's lips. "Ludwig, don't ask questions. Just tell me to stop when it starts to bother you." He smiled when Ludwig nodded and traced his hand further up the superior officer's leg.

The young Italian's hand wandered to Ludwig's upper thigh before resting firmly just next to his crotch, which was surprisingly more bulged than normal. It caused Feliciano to smirk to himself, knowing that he had aroused Ludwig on his own. He then looked up into those beautiful, clear blue eyes of Ludwig's.

Ludwig felt his heart pounding as his insides felt as if they were on fire. What was going on? Feliciano was a man! He needed to tell him to stop! Why wasn't he telling him to stop? Why did this feel so good? Why was Feliciano doing this stuff in the first place? His chest felt as if it were about to burst. What was going to happen next?

His head moved closer to Feliciano's and moments later, their lips connected in a soft, yet passionate way. Though he had never kissed anyone before, he never imagined that his first kiss would ever be with a man, especially one like Major Vargas! That was something that just seemed ridiculous to him, yet here they were, kissing in an abandoned hallway in the middle of the night.

Feliciano felt his heart pick up at a rapid speed when Ludwig's lips touched his. He didn't want just a soft, gentle kiss from the man he had been lusting after for so long. There was no way he would let that opportunity pass. Keeping his one hand on Ludwig's leg, he used the other to grab the Lieutenant's collar and position himself so he was straddling Ludwig's hips, facing him. He then pulled his superior officer closer for a deeper kiss.

Ludwig's eyes flew when Feliciano moved, but he didn't stop what he was doing. Instead, his heart picked up even more in speed. It was as if the two were playing a dangerous game where they couldn't be caught. He was pretty sure this was okay, since he was certain Feliciano wasn't a homosexual anyway. His hands gripped at the young Italian's hips as they kissed, drawing him closer.

When Feliciano felt Ludwig's hands on his hips, he nearly moaned but bit it back. He couldn't just do that. That would be too embarrassing. But what if Ludwig was trying to make him moan? Well, then he would have to try harder.

Feliciano opened his eyes to find Ludwig gazing into them. He kind of liked the intensity in them, so he kept his eyes open as well as his hand wandered over to Ludwig's groin. The German was definitely highly aroused by that point. That much was for certain. The young Italian smiled to himself. This would make his job so much easier.

The German man gasped out against Feliciano's lips when his member was brushed against. Even if it there was a cloth between Feliciano's hand and his length, he was still sensitive to the touch. All he could do was hope that what was coming would be just as wonderful as what was going on so far.

"May I?" Feliciano huskily asked Ludwig, gesturing to the buttons on the Lieutenant's pants.

Ludwig's eyes widened. "You mean…?" His eyes got even bigger when the Major nodded. "Well, of course you may, if you really want to," he slowly said. He bit back a moan as Feliciano's hands attacked the buttons of his pants. Everything he was experiencing at the moment was just so wonderful. Everything about it was just so breathtaking that Ludwig's breath hitched and began to come out in pants as he felt Feliciano's warm breath and then mouth around his member.

But everything went by too fast, and before he knew it, Ludwig was exhausted and sitting in the hallways with Feliciano in his lap, grinning. There was no more kissing, no more sexual antics, just Feliciano sitting in his lap. Something felt oddly right about that moment. There was no awkwardness or tension or anything, just perfection.

Feliciano looked up at Ludwig. "You never told me to stop," was all he could think of to say.

"I didn't, did I?" Ludwig finally asked him. He shrugged his shoulders lamely. "Oh well. Maybe another time."

The young Italian's eyes widened. "Another time?" he asked. "You would want to do something like this again?" He couldn't believe his ears. Ludwig actually enjoyed what they did enough to want to do it again?!

"Perhaps," the Lieutenant answered. "It's almost like a game where we can't be caught. That's what makes it so fun."

Feliciano's heart slightly fell at that, but he kept his smile going. Was that really what Ludwig thought of their relationship? "I agree," he laughed. "Let's do this again sometime."

At least Feliciano had somewhat moved to the next level in his relationship with Ludwig, even if his superior officer was a little blind as to what the next level really was.


	8. Chapter 8

_A/N: And we have reached another chapter of this story! As always, please read and review if you have the time!_

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Feliciano woke the next morning, feeling refreshed. He wondered if what he had done with Ludwig had been a dream. It had sure seemed like it. He stretched and yawned before sitting up and looking around the barracks.

The sun hadn't even risen yet, but then again, Feliciano had always been an early riser, even if he had gone to bed late. He wondered how many hours of sleep he had gotten. The sky was just starting to turn that light blue just before the sunrise. That was his favorite time of the morning. There was nothing he loved more than a beautiful sunrise, whether it was in Italy or Germany. If only he had Ludwig to watch it with.

He slipped on a jacket and a pair of shoes before making his way out of the barracks and out of the base in general. There was a nice hill in the back of the base where he could see everything just right. That was where he wanted to go.

When he had first gotten to this base, he had spent nearly every morning watching the sunrise there, wondering if somewhere in Italy his _nonno_ was watching it as well. He sighed and sat in the dew-covered grass, not caring if the seat of his pajama pants got wet. It wasn't like he was going to be wearing them much longer after the sunrise anyway. All he really wanted at that moment was one calm, beautiful moment in his crazy life.

Feliciano felt a sense of peace come over him as he watched the sun turn a light pink color, followed by orange and then a flaming red and yellow as the sun began to rise. He felt a smile cross his face as he just watched the beauty of nature take over the once-star-covered sky. Everything about that moment was breathtaking, and he found himself longing for Ludwig's company, just so the Lieutenant could see this beautiful sight with him.

Though the young Major wasn't sure if Ludwig cared about simple things like sunsets or anything, it was still a nice thought to think about watching one with him. He sighed as he watched the sun rise up over the horizon, yet thinking about Ludwig not enjoying it had made the sunrise lose some of its magic that morning, which upset the Italian a little.

He sighed as the sun rose higher into the sky. The sunrise was over and he needed to head back to the base before anyone noticed he was gone. His eyes looked up to the sky one last time to see how the colors could blend from orange to blue so beautifully before turning on his heel and heading back to the base. It would always be a wonder to him.

Just like Ludwig Beilschmidt.

.

Ludwig found himself looking around for even a glimpse of Feliciano that morning. He wanted to see him for some reason that he couldn't understand. Ever since the night before, he had a desire to see Feliciano at all times. It was a desire that he couldn't understand.

He found himself even asking other troops if they had seen Major Vargas anywhere, and none of them had given him a straight answer, which was starting to frustrate him. Then again, it was only just after sunrise. How could he expect Feliciano to be awake so early? Ludwig sat against the wall at the front entrance of the base to calm his mind down. It was obvious that Feliciano was still sleeping, and he couldn't just barge in there and wake him up for now reason.

As he thought more and more about it, why did he want Feliciano awake anyway? What was so important about the young Italian? It wasn't like he did much that was useful half of the time. Ludwig thought more and more. Was if because of what they had done the night before that he wanted him awake so badly? Was that why he wanted Feliciano around him so badly, so that maybe it would happen again?

Ludwig shook his head vigorously. That was just preposterous! He wasn't a homosexual! And neither was Feliciano! But then why had that happened the night before? Why had Feliciano so willingly done something like that for him? Maybe he had known that Ludwig had been under a lot of stress lately and wanted to help him out. That had to be it. There was no way that Feliciano was a homosexual, and no way that Ludwig was one either.

He nearly jumped when the door opened next to him and Feliciano walked through. Instead of yelping with surprise, Ludwig looked up at the young Major in a questioning way. "Where were you?" he asked him.

Feliciano shrugged. "Ever seen a sunrise before?" he simply asked as he kept walking.

Ludwig jumped to his feet and followed after Feliciano. "That is no answer, Feliciano! Do not answer my question with another question!"

"I was watching a sunrise," the Italian answered, glancing back at Ludwig. "It's how I like to start my days." He shrugged indifferently. "I didn't think I was doing anything wrong."

"It's not like you were, but maybe you should tell someone so you don't wscare people when you go missing," Ludwig answered.

Feliciano stopped walking and turned to Ludwig. "I scared you?" he asked.

Ludwig looked away. "That's not what I meant." He looked back up at the Italian's smiling face. "Stop smiling like that. It's annoying." The smile didn't leave Feliciano's face. "You scared me when you came in the door, okay?"

The young Major laughed. "I thought so." He grinned coyly. "Are you sure that's all? You're sure that I won't hear about you asking other soldiers if they've seen me?"

"Do you want to run laps?" Ludwig threatened. "I can make you run like I did when we first met."

Feliciano smirked at Ludwig. "You wouldn't do something like that. All I hear is an empty threat. Let's face it, Ludwig. You've gone soft on me." He leaned in closer to the Lieutenant. "I'm good stress relief, aren't I?" With that, he winked and walked away.

Ludwig stood there for a moment, dumbfounded. What was that supposed to mean? Was he really like putty in the Italian's hands. "Major Vargas, you owe me five laps around the base!" he called to him.

"Not happening, Lieutenant," Feliciano stated as he continued walking.

The Lieutenant felt his cheeks burning, but he knew it wasn't from anger. What was it from then? He decided that he didn't want to know after all as he hurried off toward the cafeteria for breakfast. Honestly, he was still trying to wrap his head around the fact that Feliciano had blown him off.

.

Feliciano's heart pounded as he walked away from Ludwig. Did he really just blow off his Lieutenant? Was there going to be consequences for that? Oh, God, he hoped not! He wouldn't be able to deal with himself if there was! Either way, he had to work on stopping his heart from racing in his chest before he got to the table where he usually sat with Ludwig.

As he changed into his uniform, he tried some deep breathing exercises. He hoped that it would calm his heart rate, but it only made him more nervous for some reason. His mind kept going back to what he and Ludwig had done the night before, making his heart pick up in speed.

How could he have been so bold with his Lieutenant? How could he have done something like that so easily? And why didn't Ludwig stop him? Unless somewhere, deep down inside of the German man, he loved Feliciano back as well. There was only one way to find out. That was to keep doing things like that until it finally came out in some way or another. Though Feliciano wondered how long it would take.

Feliciano walked into the cafeteria and got his food before sitting down across from a thoughtful-looking Ludwig. He couldn't help but wonder if Ludwig was thinking about the same kinds of things he himself was thinking about. The Italian cleared his throat a little, startling the German out of his thoughts.

"You were out of line this morning," Ludwig stated, going straight into Lieutenant mode. He looked up at Feliciano with his beautiful, blue eyes. "Are you aware of that?"

"Yes." Feliciano sighed. "But you also understand that I can't run like I used to, right?" he countered. He gestured to his legs underneath the table. "My legs aren't what they used to be, Ludwig. They were both broken in that fall of mine." The young Major frowned, thinking about how far he had fallen. He shook his head vigorously, trying to rid himself of the memory. "I don't think I can run unless if I absolutely need to."

Ludwig let out a thoughtful hum. "Then I shall have to think of a different punishment for you," he decided.

Feliciano gulped, not liking where it was going. "With all due respect, I don't understand what I'm being punished for, Ludwig. All I was doing was watching the sunrise. I don't think that warrants a punishment by any means."

The German sighed. He hated when he agreed with Feliciano on things like that. For some reason, he wanted to punish Feliciano for making him worry, but that wasn't reason enough. "Fine," he grumbled. "Then you're off the hook." He then cleared his throat. "You are aware that we have a new assignment coming up next week, right?"

The Italian nearly choked on his toast. "We what?" he asked. He hoped his eyes weren't nearly bugging out of his head as he spoke. "I'm still in your squadron?"

"Of course," Ludwig stiffly answered. "I won't let just one unfortunate situation ruin your chances of staying in the military." He took a bite of toast, chewed, and swallowed. "That would just be ridiculous."

Feliciano nodded, trying to look like he felt the same. "I understand." His stomach was doing flips inside of him. He was so scared of going on another mission. What if he broke his legs again? What would he do then? He was so scared that he could almost feel the tears coming toward his eyes, but he couldn't cry in front of Ludwig. He couldn't let himself show weakness in such a way. But was it really weakness?

"I'm glad that you do," Ludwig stated. "I was worried that you would try to back out of the military after breaking your legs." He took a drink of water. "I'm glad that you are deciding to stay."

 _Not like I really have a choice,_ Feliciano thought to himself. "Of course I'm staying," he told his Lieutenant. "There is no way I would back out when I'm this invested."

At that moment in time, all Feliciano could wonder was when he had become such a great liar.

.

 _Early Spring, 1937, Small Italian Village_

Feliciano laughed as he ran through a meadow with his older brother. The two had just gotten out of school and were racing each other to see who could get home first. They were always competing over one thing or another, so it came to neither of them as a surprise when they both shot out of the school at almost lightning speed toward the shortcut to their grandfather's house.

Lovino's face was in a permanent scowl as he ran, trying to best his brother at _something_. He was running as fast as his legs could carry him. There was no way he would let himself lose when his goal was so close in sight. His bronze eyes that matched his brother's could see their home just beyond the edge of the meadow. If only he could find a way to pick up speed and beat Feliciano there.

The younger Italian flashed a carefree smile over at his brother. "Running is so fun, Lovi!" he cheered. "We should race more often!"

"Stupid bastard!" Lovino struggled to say between pants. "You're just cheating!" He put all of his energy into beating his brother, trying to will his legs to move him faster. Maybe if he could just shut up, he would actually beat him to the house. His legs were aching from the abnormal amount of exercise. He knew he was going to tire out before he got there, but he didn't care. Maybe the adrenaline could keep him going.

Feliciano gleefully pranced forward and laughed back at Lovino. "Catch me if you can!" he called back to him.

"Are you trying to piss me off?!" his brother roared at him. His anger at his brother gave him an extra boost as he sped past him, smirking with delight. "Look who's ahead now, asshole!"

The younger brother laughed loudly. "Oh, Lovi, you're so competitive!" he giggled. "Lighten up a little!" His laughter caught up to his brother as they both slowed their pace. "Let's just walk together, okay? It'll be fun! And we'll get back to _Nonno_ and _Nonna's_ before you know it!"

Feeling manipulated by his brother's words, Lovino slowed down to a walk as he heard his brother coming up behind him. He grunted as Feliciano jumped onto his back. "Hey!" he indignantly shouted. "What do you think you're doing?!"

Feliciano laughed loudly and hugged Lovino, wrapping his legs around his brother's waist. "My legs are tired from all the running, _fratello_ ," he answered, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. "You should know how tiring it is to run."

"And what makes you think I'd carry you when my own legs are tired?" Lovino barked at him. Even so, he didn't argue or refuse. Instead, he hooked his arms under his brother's legs and supported him as he walked. "Dammit, you are so heavy!"

"I can't help that I love pasta so much!" Feliciano whined at him. "You're so mean, Lovi!"

"Just stating facts that should already be known," Lovino flatly stated. He shrugged indifferently and rolled his eyes. "So what are your plans for the future anyway? Now that you're going to graduate in a few years, you need to start thinking about that."

"Shouldn't you be thinking about it more than me?" the younger of the two questioned, cocking his head to the side. He grinned at his brother, though he knew Lovino couldn't see it. "Lovi, you'll be graduating sooner than I will be."

"I want to help _Nonno_ in the shop," Lovino told him. "What do you want to do?"

"I think I want to join the military," Feliciano answered, a dreamy look in his eyes. "Military men are so handsome, don't you think? Wouldn't I be handsome like them? What if I met someone in the military while I was in it? Wouldn't that be wonderful, Lovi?"

"Get the stars out of your eyes, Feli," Lovino grumbled. "That will never happen. You're too weak to join the military."

"Says you," Feliciano sassed. He stuck his tongue out at his brother in defiance. "One of these days I'll work my way up to Major in the military, and you'll lick my boots."

Lovino scoffed. "Yeah, sure. I'll lick your boots if you ever become Major Vargas."

The younger brother flashed his older brother a sinister grin. "Is that a promise, _fratello_?" he teasingly asked.

"Yeah, whatever," Lovino sighed. "Just get off of me, we're almost home."

.

 _Mid-August, 1942, Berlin, Germany_

Feliciano came out of his afternoon daydream to find himself staring up at the cloudy, blue sky. He blinked his eyes for a moment when he saw Ludwig looking down at him. A broad grin broke out on his face.

"Hello there, Lieutenant Beilschmidt!" he greeted. He put his hands on the ground and pushed himself up into a sitting position. "How are you doing today?" His smile was wide and carefree, almost as if he didn't realize that he had been daydreaming during training.

"You are to be paying attention to your training!" Ludwig barked at him, reminding him of his brother. "Do you want me to make you do pull-ups until your arms fall off?!"

Feliciano cringed. "I'd honestly rather not do that…" he admitted. He stretched and yawned. "What did I miss, Lieutenant? Surely not too much, right?"

"Only the whole training," Ludwig growled, pinching the bridge of his nose. "What made you even think that kind of behavior would be acceptable, Major Vargas?"

"I barely slept last night," the Italian admitted.

The German man sat next to him after dismissing the other troops, who gladly left, not wanting to see Feliciano get yelled at. "You either?" he asked, voice much kinder now that everyone was gone. "Were you thinking about what had been done between us as well?"

"Well, yeah," Feliciano admitted, hugging his legs to his chest. "You're not mad at me, are you?" He rested his chin on his knees and peered over at Ludwig. His heart picked up in speed when Ludwig looked over at him with those beautiful blue eyes.

"Why would I be mad at you?" Ludwig asked. "You did nothing wrong."

Feliciano struggled to keep his eyes from widening in surprise. So Ludwig didn't see what they did as wrong. That was good. That was actually very good. Though he had personally thought he had gone too far that night, Ludwig hadn't, and that was good. "I was thinking a lot about what we did," he admitted. "It's not bad, is it?"

"Of course not," Ludwig answered. "It's not like you actually meant it, you know?" He shrugged indifferently. "Honestly, it felt really nice." His cheeks were dusted with a light blush.

The Italian felt his heart drop down into his gut a little. So it didn't mean the same to Ludwig as it had to him. That was like a punch to the stomach for him. He didn't know what to think. He straightened up. "Yeah," he struggled to agree. "It really did feel nice."

The blush in Ludwig's cheeks grew darker. " _Ja_?" A prideful smile appeared on his face. "I'm glad you felt the same about it."

Feliciano felt his face growing red as well. " _Si_ , of course," he softly said. "Would you be interested in doing something like that again?"

"I thought we already established that," Ludwig told him, blinking in confusion. "We should do it more often. I feel more relaxed today, thanks to you."

The Italian smiled. "That's good. I'm glad that I could help." He just wished that Ludwig would realize that it was out of affection that he was doing that for him, not just to be helpful. Sometimes that blasted German was so damn aggravating. "I've got a proposition for you."

"And what's that?" Ludwig asked, raising an eyebrow to Feliciano.

"How about as long as I help you out with that stuff, you keep it between us, and I don't get punished for stupid things anymore?" Feliciano suggested. That sounded fair to him. He was always glad to get out of punishments anytime, and that seemed fair to him. That way, he could fool around with Ludwig and never get punished again. "In a way, I'd be helping you out instead of getting punished."

Ludwig thought it through for a moment. "Sure, why not?" He shrugged. "But if we do that, you must hold up your end of the bargain as well."

Feliciano almost laughed at how excited he was to be able to do that, but he knew he couldn't due to Ludwig thinking that he wasn't attracted to him. "I can do that, " he pretended to decide. "It should be simple enough."

"Then you have yourself a deal," Ludwig told him, sticking out his hand to shake.

The young Italian shook it and smiled. "Deal." He smiled widely, hoping to look highly convincing that he had nothing evil planned up his sleeve. After all, that night was the night he was going to bust out a prisoner, after all.


	9. Chapter 9

_A/N: Please enjoy this chapter! Review if you have the time and enjoyed it!_

 _._

Feliciano wandered around the area of the prison cells. He hadn't bothered to check in on Antonio's situation that day, certain that they hadn't called in the SS yet. There was no need to check on the Spaniard at all, so he waited until around midnight to sneak into the prison cell area to break Antonio out.

No one was around when he made his way down the long, empty hallway toward Antonio's cell. He hoped that no one would show up either. What he was doing was wrong, and he knew it. He could be taken prisoner for letting one go, but he couldn't just sit back and watch another person be sent away to a camp again, especially one so dear to Lovi…No, his mind was made up. He was going to be a real hero this time.

Once he got to Antonio's cell, he knew something was wrong. It reeked of blood and a bunch of other things. Was he absolutely sure he had gotten to the right cell? Or did he need to go down a couple more to get to Antonio's? Surely this couldn't be the cell of the smiling Spaniard he had just seen only the night before! If it was, why did it smell so terrible?

His eyes widened. The SS! Did they get to him?! Feliciano felt his heart begin to race as he rattled at the bars, seeing Antonio lying in a crumpled heap on the bunk.

"Antonio?" he weakly asked. He saw the heap move slightly, which meant that the Spaniard was still alive. But how alive was he? His stomach dropped into his gut. Feliciano wasn't sure he could handle this. He didn't know how alive Antonio was. Would he even make it out of the base?

"F-Feli?" he heard the Spaniard weakly ask. "P-Please tell me it's you…" Antonio's voice was barely above a whisper, and it was so pained, as if it was taking everything in him to speak.

"It's me, Antonio," Feliciano confirmed with a nod. "Please don't say another word. I'm going to save you, okay? Just hang in there."

"It's...too late...for me…" Antonio heaved. "D-Don't….waste time…."

"It won't be a waste of time, Antonio," the Italian insisted. "My brother loves you, and he needs you to come home to him. I'm doing this for Lovino, don't you get that?"

At the mention of Lovino, Antonio's head shot up. It were almost as if he were suddenly energized by the thought of returning back to Lovino. As if Lovino were a perfect reason to keep pushing through the hell his life had become that day.

"Feli…" he weakly said. "You….You have to….help me…."

"I will," Feliciano told him. "Just stay quiet, Antonio. I'm going to get you out of there, and I'm going to get you back to my home." He pulled a pin out of the breast pocket of his uniform and began to mess with the lock on the door. "Now hold on while I pick the lock on here."

As Feliciano fiddled with the lock, he listened closely for any signs of life coming their way. He knew that he had to get Antonio out as fast as he could, but he didn't know how fast he was going to be able to. Antonio seemed pretty bad off, and Feliciano could tell that he wouldn't be able to move too quickly. That was going to be the only real problem.

After all, Antonio was larger than Feliciano, being much older than the young Italian. There was no way Feliciano would be able to carry him or anything of that sort. Sure, he could help support him while they walked, but that was it.

The lock suddenly clicked and opened. Feliciano quickly removed it from the door and opened it, walking into the cell. The stench was even worse inside there. His nose wrinkled up in disgust as he tried his best not to breathe unless necessary.

"Let's go, Antonio," he quickly said, reaching his hand out toward the Spaniard. His eyes widened in horror when Antonio's hand reached for his. It was missing fingers! He felt as if he were going to vomit at any moment! "What happened?" he shakily asked.

"Them…" Antonio darkly answered, face clouding over in the pale moonlight. "They think I'm a resistance member…"

Feliciano felt disgusted with the military and even with himself for being a part of it. "I'm so sorry, Toni. I'm going to get you out of here right now. I swear it!" He turned around to see a tall figure standing in the doorway, though he couldn't see their face due to the shadows covering it. His heart skipped a beat as he stood there. "Th-This isn't…."

"What are you doing, Feliciano?" Ludwig asked, stepping out of the shadows and into the cell. "Are you really breaking a prisoner out? Do you know what will happen to you? You know that I need to report this, right?"

The Italian sat Antonio back on the bed and ran to Ludwig, tears in his eyes. "You can't!" he pleaded. "Ludwig, please! Please, you can't do this to me! To him!"

"And just why is he so important?" Ludwig asked him. "What makes him so special that we have to save him?"

Feliciano tried not to notice the fact that Ludwig used the word "we" instead of "you". He focused instead on the fact that Ludwig was asking for a reason to save Antonio. His mind needed to think quickly if he wanted to save the life of the Spaniard. What was something he could say that he knew would get through to Ludwig on how important it would be for him to save Antonio? And then it came to him.

"You don't understand!" Feliciano pleaded to his superior officer. "Ludwig, please! Just hear me out! This man right here, Antonio Fernandez Carriedo, is my cousin! He wasn't supposed to end up here! You have to help me, Ludwig! Or at least don't tell them it was me!"

The Lieutenant stood there for a moment in silence. "Family, you say?" he asked. "And just how are you related to a Spaniard if you are pure Italian?"

"Okay, so maybe he's not related by blood, but he was raised in our family!" Feliciano pleaded. "You have to understand, I've known him since I was just a boy!" His eyes pleaded with Ludwig. "Please let me save him! My family will never forgive me if I let him die like this!"

Antonio lifted his head at the word "die", a panicked expression on his face. He began praying to himself in Spanish, hoping that by the grace of some sort of deity he would make it out of there that night. All he wanted was to make it back to Lovino.

As if to prove himself, Antonio suddenly stated in a strained voice, "He has an older brother named Lovino who looks like him. His grandfather, Roma Vargas, owns a small shop that they lived above when he was growing up in a small Italian village. His grandmother, Andriana Vargas, passed away almost a year ago. His parents passed away when he was an infant." His green eyes locked with Ludwig's blue ones. "Anything else?"

Ludwig stood there for a moment. His eyes looked as if they were sizing Antonio up. He didn't move a single muscle until he finally turned to face Feliciano. "We don't have much time. Feliciano, I'll go on ahead and out of the base. We will meet up down the road to the east, and I will take him the rest of the way from there."

"The rest of the way?" Feliciano asked him. It suddenly dawned on him. "We're saving my Toni?"

" _Ja_ ," Ludwig slowly answered. "But never again shall we do this. And you will owe me for this."

Feliciano nodded eagerly before hugging the Lieutenant. "Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!" he quietly cheered. "You have no idea how much this means to me!"

The Lieutenant sighed. "I'm pretty sure I do, but that's beside the point. I need to go and make sure that no one will see you. I'll be the distraction. Just keep your eyes on me, or try to."

The young Italian nodded. "Got it," he answered. He looked to the Spaniard. "Are you ready to go, Toni?" he asked.

Antonio weakly nodded his head in agreement as Feliciano slipped an arm around his waist to help support him. "I will make sure to tell Lovi of this," he weakly panted. "He... will know."

Feliciano looked to the Spaniard. "Don't talk, Toni. We can't afford to have you give us away, you know." He then turned to Ludwig. "Let's get going."

.

It all happened so fast that Feliciano found himself outside before he knew it. Though there were times that he thought he was done for when he and Ludwig would round a corner and find a random soldier, but Ludwig would go out and distract them while Feliciano would wait for the soldier to leave, heart pounding in panic the whole time.

Antonio was starting to get heavy as his strength was leaving him. He was starting to lose consciousness as well. That wasn't good. He had to stay awake through these injuries, or else he may never wake again. And if he never woke again, that would mean heartbreak for Lovino, and Feliciano just couldn't handle that.

"Stay awake, Toni," Feliciano muttered to him. "You need to stay awake."

"I am," Antonio grumbled at him. "I just need to rest my eyes."

"No!" Feliciano commanded. "No resting your eyes, Antonio! If you do that, you may fall asleep, and that won't be good for anyone!"

"My hands hurt," Antonio sighed.

Feliciano began to feel nauseous once more. "Everything will be okay as long as you stay awake," he tried to assure the Spaniard. "You need to trust me on that."

"Trust you?" Antonio let out a bitter laugh. "I trusted you when you said those monsters wouldn't come for me, and now I'm missing fingers. You're going to leave me with another monster, Feliciano. Why should I trust you after you leave me?"

Feliciano felt his blood run cold. "I trust Ludwig," he answered.

"But why should I trust him just because you do?" Antonio asked him. "This Ludwig guy could hate me, for all you know. He may try to kill me on the way to wherever we're going."

"Ludwig wouldn't do that," the Italian answered. "Just trust me, Toni."

He sighed. "I don't know, Feli. I'm just about done with all of this trusting business."

Feliciano looked ahead of them and saw Ludwig in the distance. "Trust me for Lovi's sake," he finally said. "Do it for Lovi."

That shut the Spaniard up, and they continued the rest of the way to Ludwig in silence.

.

Feliciano waited in the front room of the base for Ludwig to return. He was anxious to know what had been done about Antonio, and where his Lieutenant had taken him. All he could hope was that the Spaniard was safe and sound, getting the medical attention that he needed. His heart was pounding wildly in his chest as he sat on the bench by the door, waiting for the familiar blond to walk in.

He perked up a bit as the door opened and Ludwig walked in. His bronze eyes took in the familiar German as he jumped up to hug him. Feliciano wrapped his arms around Ludwig in excitement. "You did it!" he cried out excitedly.

"Keep your voice down!" Ludwig hissed at him. "Of course I did it. What kind of man do you take me for, Feliciano?" He smiled at the look of relief on the Italian's face. "He's safe now. Just know that much."

"What could I ever do to repay you?" Feliciano asked him, eyes wide and excited. "I'll do anything for you! Anything at all!" His hands grasped at Ludwig's. "I owe you everything for this!"

At that moment, Ludwig did not wish to speak of debt, for he was stressed out to his limit. He wanted to release the stress inside of him in the way he had the night before. But the question was, how could he initiate that? What could he possibly do to get Feliciano to do what he did last night? He didn't want to just come out and ask him, not wanting to seem desperate for it. He also didn't want to seem as if he expected it from him.

"Come with me, and allow me to thank you properly," Feliciano told him. He began to lead the way outside of the base. "Follow me, Ludwig." His smile led the Lieutenant to follow him out of the base and to the place where he watched the sunrise just that morning. "Here we are," he said as they arrived.

"What are we doing here?" Ludwig asked, looking to the base in the distance. He didn't know why they were so far away from the base.

"This is so no one will find us or see us," Feliciano told him. "Now, please, allow me to relieve your stress from tonight." He winked at Ludwig. "It's the least I could do for what you did for me tonight, Ludwig."

The German felt his cheeks flush a bright red, but it wasn't noticeable in the pale moonlight. "I would appreciate that," he finally said after a moment of gathering his bearings. "How would you like to start this?" He stood there awkwardly for a moment, not really knowing what to do until the young Major stepped over to him. "So you're initiating?"

"Ludwig," Feliciano said in a low voice. He put a finger to the Lieutenant's lips. "Stop talking." His bronze eyes winked at Ludwig. "I can handle this on my own." The Major then dropped to his knees before him and began to unbutton Ludwig's pants.

The Lieutenant gasped out when he felt Feliciano's fingers brush against his sensitive length. He knew this was going to make his time that night worth it. His fingers found their way into Feliciano's hair, finding it rather soft. "Feliciano," he softly sighed out.

Enjoying the sound of his name coming from Ludwig's lips, Feliciano sighed softly, working a little faster on Ludwig's pants. He wanted to please Ludwig even more, now that he had the Lieutenant's encouragement. His fingers finally finished up on Ludwig's pants and unleashed his length, which was starting to erect itself. It made him happy that he could turn Ludwig on so much just by doing something so simple.

"Are you ready?" Feliciano asked, looking up at him.

With Feliciano looking up at him like that, how could Ludwig say no? He simply nodded at Feliciano and nearly fell, growing weak in his knees when he felt Feliciano's mouth close around his length. How was it that Feliciano knew exactly what to do? What did these sorts of acts between him and Feliciano mean? Were they really just stress relief? Was that really all Ludwig wanted them to be? Would he really want anyone else to do something like this with him?

It was then that he realized that it was Feliciano only that he wanted to do things like this with. He tried to picture someone else, and felt himself becoming less interested before reminding himself that it was Feliciano doing it. His legs felt weak at the thought of Feliciano. What was going on in his head? Men weren't supposed to think of other men like that, were they? But what was so wrong about him thinking of Feliciano in that way if it was just kept between them?

Feliciano knew what he was doing. He wanted to make Ludwig feel the best that he could make him feel. There was nothing he wanted more.

After Ludwig hit his climax, he sat on the ground, panting as Feliciano cleaned himself off. His head was spinning with lust and thoughts of Feliciano. Was this really okay? Was it okay for him to think of Feliciano in lustful ways? Did Feliciano want to be thought of in those ways by him? Was that okay?

Feliciano looked over at Ludwig, sitting down next to him. "What are you thinking about, Ludwig?" he asked him. "You're being really quiet tonight. It's concerning. Did I do something wrong?"

"You did nothing wrong," Ludwig quietly answered. "If I'm honest, I think it's me who is doing things wrong."

"What do you mean?" Feliciano asked. He cocked his head to the side in confusion. "I guess I don't understand what you mean. You're not exactly making the most of sense, if I'm being honest."

"How can I make better sense?" Ludwig asked, looking over at the Italian. "Just say the word, and I'll do it."

Feliciano thought for a moment. "I want you to show me what's going on in your head. Actions speak louder than words, and some words are words that I don't understand. It's kind of how I don't understand how you could possibly be doing anything wrong when you're not doing anything at all, if you know what I'm saying." He sighed. "And now look at me. I'm rambling." He frowned, wishing there was a better way to get his point across. "But anyway, I just feel as if there could be a better way for you to explain all of this to me."

"So you think my actions would speak louder than my words?" Ludwig asked him. He shrugged. "Fine. Then I will show you what is going on in _mein_ head through my actions."

Without another word, Ludwig grabbed Feliciano by the waist and moved the Italian to his lap before kissing him passionately. He didn't know why he felt so much lust for the Italian, but he felt as if he were in love with him. He wanted to be with Feliciano at all times. That was why he had followed him to the prison cells that night. That was why he couldn't say no to helping bust Antonio out. He was wrapped around Feliciano's finger, and there was no way he could ever escape that.

The young Italian's eyes opened wide in surprise, but then closed as he slid his arms around Ludwig's shoulders and kissed him back. He had been waiting for something like this for so long, but he felt as if it would never happen, knowing Ludwig's stance on homosexuality. But now it was finally real. All Feliciano could do was pray that this wasn't a dream.

When they finally broke apart, Feliciano looked into Ludwig's blue eyes, trying to find a hint of joking in there, but all he could see was love. He was confused. When had Ludwig fallen in love with him? How had that happened? Something like this had never happened to the Italian before.

"Ludwig, are you all right?" he asked, just to make sure that his Lieutenant was feeling okay. After all, he didn't want to make the mistake of confessing his love to him if Ludwig wasn't completely sure that he loved him.

"I haven't felt this great in a long time," Ludwig answered, catching his breath.

Feliciano smiled at him. "I'm glad to hear that," he told him. "Listen, Ludwig, there's something I need to tell you."

"Allow me to speak first," Ludwig responded with.

"Very well," the Italian answered with a nod. "You go first then."

"I never once thought I was interested in men until you came along, Feliciano," Ludwig began. "You have turned my world upside down. Ever since your first day when you defied my command and I made you run, that was when I first started noticing you for who you are. And now, I just want to say one thing. I think I'm in love with you."

Feliciano felt his heart skip a beat in his chest. There it was. Ludwig had just confessed his love to him, and it was just as wonderful as he had always imagined that it would be. In fact, it was even more wonderful that he could have ever imagined. His eyes had widened and he felt his face heating up.

"You think you're in love with me?" Feliciano asked.

"Look, I know it sounds silly, but-"

Without another word, Feliciano pressed his lips to Ludwig's, shutting him up. He just wanted to kiss Ludwig's problems and cares away. He wanted to be everything to Ludwig, just like how Ludwig was everything to him. There was nothing he had wanted more than to hear those words from him.

"I love you too," Feliciano told him when they broke apart. "For as long as I've known you."

Ludwig couldn't do anything but smile. After all, how lucky could they both seem to be, to be in love with each other? But then again, how unfortunate, considering they were both men?


	10. Chapter 10

_A/N: As always, please read and review if you liked it!_

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Feliciano didn't know what to make of the previous night when he woke up the next morning. His heart felt light as air and he was lightheaded. He almost felt as if he had dreamed it all up. Did he? There was only one way to find out. He had to find Ludwig, and fast, before anyone woke up. If the previous night had really happened, then he doubted that Ludwig was sleeping either.

He quickly got up out of his bunk and dressed himself before emerging out into the corridor. Sure enough, he found Ludwig by the front door of the base. A pale blush decorated his cheeks when the Lieutenant looked up at him. "You're up early," he commented.

" _Ja_ ," Ludwig sighed, nodding. "I couldn't sleep last night." He shrugged. "You look as if you had that same problem as I did."

Feliciano chuckled to himself. "You caught me," he said. He smiled at Ludwig and then glanced out the window. "The sun will be rising soon. Follow me."

Once again, Feliciano led Ludwig to the spot where they had been the night before. He smiled at the look on Ludwig's face. It was as if Ludwig were recalling the previous night, that wonderful night of confessions. How could either of them ever forget? It was so magical between them. Who could forget an experience like that? There was no way.

Ludwig looked out toward the horizon as the sky began to change colors. The sun was rising, and it was beautiful. There was no one he'd rather experience that moment with more than Feliciano. He slowly reached out for his love's hand and held it tightly, lacing their fingers together.

The young Major looked up at Ludwig, feeling content with life. Everything seemed to be going well between them. He leaned his head on Ludwig's shoulder. His heart was pounding in his chest, but he liked the feeling of it. "Ludwig?" he softly asked.

He looked down at Feliciano with kind eyes, liking the way he looked in the flaming colors of the sunrise. "What is it, Feliciano?" he asked, trying not to stumble over his words as he spoke. Why did he always feel this way around the Major? It felt as if Feliciano made him nervous, yet Ludwig was almost never nervous. SO why was he nervous now, especially since they shared this mutual feeling? It just didn't make sense.

Feliciano struggled to find the words to say as he looked up at his Lieutenant. In the lighting, Ludwig seemed to have a glow about him. "Thank you for coming with me here this morning." He couldn't tear his eyes away from the man before him and, without thinking, he suddenly kissed him. " _Ti amo_ , Ludwig," he softly said against his lips.

Ludwig hummed his confusion before gently pulling away. "What was that you said?"

"It means I love you in Italian," Feliciano answered, looking down at his feet.

Ludwig put his fingers under Feliciano's chin and tilted his head up to look him in the eyes. " _Ich liebe dich_ , Feliciano," he gently told him. "That's I love you in German." He smiled at the joyous look on the Italian's face. He then leaned in and kissed Feliciano's forehead.

The Italian felt as if his heart would burst from pure joy. How could fate allow him to be so happy with Ludwig? Everything about that moment was so perfect. He never wanted it to end, and he hoped it never had to.

But like all moments, it would.

.

When Ludwig and Feliciano returned to the base that morning, everyone was in panic mode. The two could hardly make sense of what was going on. Everyone was rushing around, as if they were looking for someone or something.

Finally, a soldier ran up to them. "There you are!" he exclaimed. "Your names were called over the intercom not too long ago! General Roeder is pissed! He wants to see you in his office immediately!"

Feliciano's heart sunk immediately. They knew about Antonio, and they knew it was them. That had to be it! He began to internally panic, yet he kept a straight face. In that moment, he stole a quick glance at Ludwig to see that he still had his bearings collected, so he attempted to copy him as best as he could.

"Come, Major Vargas," Ludwig said in his Lieutenant voice. "We have business to take care of." He then began walking toward Roeder's office. "Major Vargas, are you coming or not?"

Feliciano quickly caught up to pace with Ludwig, terrified out of his mind. He had only heard stories of what happened to soldiers who had committed treason, but they were all terrifyingly terrible. What was going to happen to him, he wondered as he followed behind Ludwig. It took all he had within him not to scream out of fright upon entering the General's office.

"I suppose you're wondering why I called you two in here today," General Roeder stated, facing the map on his wall, his back to the two men who had entered. "Simple. We had a prisoner escape last night. Are you two aware of that?"

"I was unaware," Ludwig answered with such confidence that even Feliciano would have believed him if he hadn't seen him with his own eyes the night before. "Forgive me for my rudeness, but what does that have to do with us, General?"

Roeder then turned to them. "I believe that Major Vargas had something to do with it," he snarled, walking up to Feliciano, who stood his ground for the time being. "You see, when Major Vargas had his accident, the prisoner we had fit the description of one of the men involved in that accident."

"Impossible," Ludwig simply stated.

"Excuse me?" Roeder asked, looking over at Ludwig, taking his gaze off of the young Major for a few moments. "What did you say, Lieutenant?"

"Impossible," Ludwig repeated. "Major Vargas was on cleaning duty with me last night. We were cleaning the guns until late into the night, hence why we are so exhausted today."

"And why should I believe that?" the General demanded, eyeing Ludwig suspiciously.

"Because it is the truth," the Lieutenant stated. "The guns were in desperate need of cleaning. We stayed late into the night and cleaned the entire stock. If you do not believe me, you may check for yourself. Each gun is cleaned to your liking, sir, and I could not have done it without the help of Major Vargas."

It all clicked in Feliciano's head. That was why Ludwig didn't sleep that night. He was building their alibi. Ludwig had been smarter than he had been. Feliciano made a mental note to thank him later if Roeder bought it.

Roeder eyed both men suspiciously. "If I go in there, and I see even one gun that is not to my liking, you two are committed of treason," he said.

Ludwig looked him in the eye. "You will not find one gun that will not meet your standards," he answered. "We made sure to get all of them."

"If you had nothing to do with last night's break-out, then why did you get to my office so late?" Roeder asked them, this time directing the question to Feliciano.

Even though his heart was pounding, Feliciano knew he had to be strong. Ludwig was counting on him for this. "It was my fault, sir," he stated with confidence. "I had slept in due to my late night. Lieutenant Beilschmidt had made it his duty to come and wake me so I would not get reprimanded. Please give me any punishment you think I deserve, and I will take my Lieutenant's punishment as well, General."

Roeder almost cracked a grin. "So you are finally accepting responsibility for your own actions, I see," he mused. "And you're willing to accept that your actions also have an affect on others. It's nice to see that your eyes have somewhat been opened to the world. Drop and give me one hundred push-ups."

Feliciano dropped down and began following command as the General walked over to Ludwig.

"I see you have trained him well, Lieutenant," Roeder said, watching Feliciano as he pushed himself up and down. "You should be proud of your work." He then leaned in toward Ludwig. "And you're absolutely sure he had nothing to do with the break-out?"

Ludwig looked Roeder in the eye as he said, "He was with me last night." There was no way that Roeder would be able to detect a lie in his eyes, because it wasn't a lie. Feliciano really had been with him that night, and they had broken Antonio out together. And after their time on the hill together, he had gone back and cleaned every gun in their stock, staying up all night to do so, just so they could have a solid alibi.

Roeder examined Ludwig's face for a moment. "You're telling the truth, Lieutenant. You know that I can detect a lie in someone's eyes. You know better than to lie to me." He clapped a hand on Ludwig's shoulder. "Once the Major is finished with his punishment, you two are free to go. But just so you know, I will be inspecting the gun stock. And if they are not cleaned to my liking, you _will_ be getting called back here."

Ludwig nodded. "Understood." He looked down at Feliciano and patiently waited for him to be finished with his push-ups so they could go and eat breakfast.

.

"I can't believe you cleaned all of the guns last night," Feliciano whispered to Ludwig on their way to the mess hall for breakfast. "You're officially my hero."

Ludwig's chest swelled with pride at Feliciano's comment. "Well I had to create some sort of alibi," he stated. "Do you even know how hard it was to even do that in the limited amount of time I had?"

"Thank you," the Italian said to him, smiling widely. "Thank you for everything, Ludwig. You are seriously the best Lieutenant ever."

By that point, Ludwig felt as if his heart were going to burst from all of the compliments he was receiving from Feliciano. He almost made a grab for his chest, but decided to play it cool instead. " _Danke_ , Major Vargas," he stated as some other military personnel walked past them. "I appreciate your kind words toward me."

Feliciano leaned toward him and whispered, "And be expecting some kind actions later as well." He wiggled his eyebrows at Ludwig, who blushed and looked away. "But in all seriousness," he said, bringing his voice to normal volume, "you are a goddamn genius, I tell you. I never would have thought to do what you did."

Ludwig smiled to himself. He knew that as well. Though Feliciano was a bit of an airhead, he was _his_ airhead. "I know you wouldn't have thought to do so," he simply said as they walked into the cafeteria. "Now hush while we're around people."

The Major obediently nodded, yet he couldn't keep his smile off of his face as he stood next to Ludwig in line and then sat across from him at the table while they ate together. He just couldn't help but smile over the fact that Ludwig did so much for him in just one night, all so they could save Antonio and themselves. It really touched his heart in a way that he couldn't even begin to explain in any way, shape, or form.

As Ludwig sat across the table from Feliciano, he was still trying to wrap his head around the fact that he had actually gotten away with lying to a human lie detector. It was almost exhilarating, but also slightly terrifying. There was no telling what was in store for them in the future, but hopefully they had gotten away with it.

.

For the next week or so, every time Feliciano heard the crackle of the intercom coming on, he would squeeze his eyes shut, praying that it wasn't going to be for him and Ludwig. It never was, but he just couldn't be too careful. He was almost paranoid that they were going to get caught. Yet as the time passed, the feeling began to dissipate and he began to relax once again.

He approached Ludwig one day to voice his concerns about it. It was just after training and Ludwig was carrying the guns back. "Do you need any help, Lieutenant?" Feliciano asked, stretching out his arms to hold some guns.

Ludwig gave him a few of them, but not many, from the stack he was carrying. " _Danke_ , Feliciano," he said, making sure no one was around when he called the Italian by his first name. "How are you today?"

"I'm fine," Feliciano answered. "But I just feel strange."

"Strange? How so, if you don't mind me asking?"

"Ever since we were called to General Roeder's office, I always feel as if I need to watch my back for anything and everything," the Major admitted. "It's a strange feeling. I feel as if I'm in trouble, even when I know I'm not."

"It's guilt," Ludwig stated. "But you can't give in to it. It will destroy you if you let it." He looked over at Feliciano, stopping in his tracks. "If you let guilt win, then everything we did for Antonio will be for nothing," he quietly said, even though no one was around. "Do you really want that, Feliciano?"

The Italian looked down at his feet. "No," he said. "I want to know that I was finally a hero to someone in need."

"Then remain that hero and don't let your guilt overpower you," the Lieutenant responded. "It's the only thing you can do right now." He began walking once more, Feliciano following right behind him. "You see, I didn't stay up cleaning all of the guns for nothing."

"That's true," Feliciano agreed.

"Don't make my work go to waste," Ludwig told him.

Feliciano nodded. "I won't, Lieutenant," he said as they began nearing people once more. "I will do my best to make sure it doesn't."

"Good," the German officer said with a smile. "Now hand me those guns and get to your duties."

The Italian did as told and hurried off to clean with the other troops. It was his job that day to work with the others while Ludwig did inventory. Usually they would switch every other day.

Ludwig stood there in the gun shed and began his inventory. In all honesty, after cleaning every gun by himself, he never wanted to look at another one again. He just hoped he could finish all of this quickly and get back to Feliciano. That was all he truly wanted to do.

But fate didn't have that in the plans as his name was heard over the intercom moments later. "Lieutenant Ludwig Beilschmidt, please report to General Roeder's office. Lieutenant Beilschmidt, report to General Roeder."

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Ludwig entered the office, feeling as if he were walking into a lion's den, though he didn't understand why. He never really cared much for Roeder, almost to the point of disliking him. He didn't understand the General's problem with Feliciano, for he was always picking on the young Italian, and it didn't seem fair.

"You wanted to see me, sir?" he asked in German as he walked in.

"Yes, have a seat, Beilschmidt," the General responded, also in German. He turned to Ludwig as he sat. "You're probably wondering why I called you here, Ludwig. It's because your performance out there has gotten better than before."

"Thank you, sir," Ludwig said with a nod of acknowledgement. "I appreciate it."

"That is why we have all talked it over and want to promote you to Colonel," Roeder continued. "How do you feel about that, Beilschmidt?"

The Lieutenant could barely believe his ears. "You want me to be a Colonel?" he asked, shocked. He was struggling to hide his surprise. "I don't understand what I did to deserve promotion."

"You work hard out there, and you are one of the best soldiers we have out there at the moment," Roeder replied. "We want to promote you to Colonel."

Ludwig nodded once more. "I see." He thought it over for a moment. "I shall accept," he decided. "Thank you very much for the promotion in rank. I know that my family back home will be pleased to hear of it."

Roeder was quiet for a moment before saying, "We have decided to promote Major Vargas as well. He seems to be showing a lot of improvement. He will be called here next. Well done on your work. Make Germany proud, _Colonel_ Beilschmidt. You are dismissed."

Ludwig nodded and thanked his superior officer once more before exiting the office. He stood down the hall, waiting as they heard Feliciano's name get called over the intercom. All he wanted to do was assure Feliciano that it was a good thing that he was being called there for, especially when he saw how nervous the young now-Lieutenant looked.

He cast Feliciano a smile. "Don't worry," he softly said. "You're not in trouble."

Feliciano nodded and went into the office. When he came out a few minutes later, he was beaming. He ran to Ludwig and grinned widely, almost bouncing up and down with joy.

"How did you know that I was going to be a Lieutenant?" he asked excitedly. His grin stretched from ear to ear. "I'm so happy right now! My family will be-" His voice suddenly cut off as his face went blank. "Actually, I don't think I'm going to tell them."

"Why not?" Ludwig asked. "Getting moved up in rank in the military is something to be proud of, Lieutenant Vargas. You should tell them."

"My brother doesn't like that I'm in the military," Feliciano answered, frowning. "He doesn't see me as any kind of hero." His fingers pointed to his legs. "You seem to forget what happened last time we saw each other…"

The newly-promoted Colonel frowned. "Forgive me, Feliciano. I had forgotten. I hope you are proud of yourself at least. You earned that rank. Don't let anyone tell your otherwise. You are going to make such a great Lieutenant."

"He probably already told _Nonno_ what I did," Feliciano continued, ignoring Ludwig's words. "I'll never be forgiven by my family for being an opposing force." He looked up at Ludwig. "Am I really doing the right thing?"

"What kind of a question is that?" Ludwig asked him. "Of course you're doing the right thing. We're helping our countries. We're building better lives for the people in them. It's not like we're killing people for no reason."

The newly-appointed Lieutenant looked up at the man he loved. "I hope you're right," he said. "That way I can sleep at night knowing that I'm doing at least one thing right."

"Trust me, you're doing a lot of things right," the Colonel said to him, placing a hand on his shoulder. "If you weren't, you wouldn't have gotten promoted in rank."

Feliciano shrugged. "I guess you're right, Ludwig," he stated. "I just don't feel like that much of a hero anymore. I came into this war thinking I was going to save everyone, but so far I haven't really saved anyone at all…"

"That's a lie," Ludwig said. He leaned in close and whispered into Felciano's ear. "You saved Antonio."

The Italian's eyes widened. "I did, didn't I?" he asked. He smiled at Ludwig. "And you helped me. I guess we are heroes, aren't we?"

"We always have been, Feliciano," Ludwig told him. "It's all about how you see it. And from how I see it, you're one of the biggest heroes of them all because you will sacrifice anything for what is right."

"It's because that's what my _nonno_ taught me at a young age." Feliciano got a dreamy look in his eyes. "Anyway, we should be getting back to our duties. I'll see you at lunch?"

" _Ja_ , see you then," Ludwig told him. He smiled and waved Feliciano off.

But as he watched the Italian walk away, he couldn't help but feel bothered by the fact that the Italian felt his own family wouldn't be proud of him for getting promoted in rank. Who wouldn't be proud of someone for that? Did his family really not see him as a hero? What was wrong with them? Feliciano was a damned hero, and that was that. Who cared what his family thought?


	11. Chapter 11

_A/N: I am so sorry about the lack of updates lately! I will be updating more often from now on! I finally have Wi-Fi again!_

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 _Late July, 1942, Berlin, Germany_

Feliciano took a deep breath as he changed into his uniform. He was going on his first mission since his accident, and they were to be leaving that morning. His heart was doing flips in his chest and pounding in a way it never had before. Dare he say he was nervous? That would be the only proper term for the feeling he was experiencing. He didn't know if he would be able to handle all of the pressure.

This was also his first mission as a Lieutenant. He had a lot of men counting on him. There was no way he could fail them like last time he went on a mission. Everything had to go perfectly, or he would never live it down. It would be too much to fail them all again. If that were to happen, what good would he ever really be to anyone ever again? He had never felt more pressure on himself in his life.

Just as he finished preparing himself, Ludwig appeared behind him in the bathroom mirror. "Are you ready, Lieutenant Vargas?" he asked. "We will be leaving soon. You have to make a good example of yourself by showing up before your men, or else they will never respect you as a leader."

Feliciano glanced back at Ludwig in the mirror before turning to him and nodding. "I'm as ready as I'll ever be," he answered. He didn't want to show any hint of how nervous he was, for fear that Ludwig would pick up on it and start asking questions. "Let's get going."

"Hold on a moment," Ludwig said, putting a hand to Feliciano's chest to stop him. "You're nervous, aren't you? After all, this is your first mission since the accident." He frowned when the Italian averted his eyes instead of answering. "Try not to think about what happened last time, Feliciano. It's highly unlikely that it will ever happen again. Your brother won't be there. You won't fall. Nothing will go wrong."

"How can you be so sure?" the shorter of the two asked, looking up at the German with his bronze eyes. "Lovi wasn't supposed to be there last time, yet there he was."

The Colonel was silent for a moment. "It's true that there is no way that I can be completely sure, but the chances of all of that happening again is highly unlikely. You need to trust me on this. If you can't trust me, then who can you trust?"

The Italian thought it over for a moment. "You're right," he finally said. "I need to learn to trust again. Everything is just so difficult right now." He took a deep breath. "Okay, I'm calm. Let's go, Ludwig. I can't keep my men waiting. That would be irresponsible."

Ludwig cast Feliciano a concerned look, but he followed after his companion as he left the room. He wished that there was a way he could understand or read what was going on in the Italian's head, but he knew that was impossible. No one ever knew what was going on in his head, so how could Ludwig ever know either.

"Is something wrong, Colonel Beilschmidt?" Feliciano asked, looking over at him. "You're acting strangely. Is it that you don't trust me on this mission?" He raised an eyebrow to his love. "I can handle this."

"It's not that I don't think you can handle it, Lieutenant Vargas," he answered. "I just worry because of what happened last time."

"So you're unsure, too," the Lieutenant sighed. "How am I supposed to be sure of myself when you're not even sure?" His mouth formed into a hard line for a moment as he clenched his jaw and thought. He thought Ludwig would always believe in him, but now he wasn't so sure anymore. Then again, after what happened last time, who would believe in him?

"That's not what I meant," Ludwig groaned. "What I meant was-"

"I don't care what you meant," Feliciano answered, cutting him off. "I'm going to show you that I can do it." He then picked up his pace, walking ahead of Ludwig, only slightly disappointed when Ludwig didn't make an effort to keep up with him.

.

The Lieutenant and the Colonel sat next to each other in the back of a military truck in the caravan. Neither of them had spoken a word to each other since Feliciano had walked away from Ludwig. They didn't exactly know what to say to each other. Feliciano was worried that Ludwig was angry with him for walking away, and Ludwig was worried that he had overstepped his boundaries with Feliciano.

"I take it there is something big coming up, Lieutenant Vargas?" a soldier asked. "You and Colonel Beilschmidt aren't even saying a word to each other right now. That must mean something big is going to happen."

Feliciano's eyes widened. He had no idea that his own troops would notice that he wasn't talking to Ludwig. Was it that obvious that they spoke with each other so often and spent so much time together? What was he supposed to say? How was he supposed to respond?

"Lieutenant Vargas is working on his plans, no doubt," Ludwig stated. "That would be the only reason for his extended silence." He glanced over at the man he loved and gave him a curt nod. "He knows what's best for his men."

Feliciano couldn't tell if Ludwig was trying to spite him or not. He simply just nodded back. "I am thinking up strategies is all." The honest truth was that he was trying to think of a way to get Ludwig alone so he could ask for forgiveness for his behavior. Technically it was a strategy, just not one that he should have been thinking of at that moment in time.

"See?" the German asked the soldier. "He is a responsible Lieutenant. He was promoted for this reason. Maybe you would get promoted if you did something like this."

The soldier crossed his arms over his chest and grumbled to himself as Ludwig went back to relaxing in his seat. Ludwig always had trouble getting along with some of the soldiers, considering that he was more strict and harsh than Feliciano ever was.

"What strategies have you come up with?" a young Major asked Feliciano.

The Italian felt like a deer in headlights as his heart began to race. He had been spacing off during the briefing, depending on Ludwig to hear what the mission was about. In all honesty, Feliciano didn't even know what he was supposed to do as a Lieutenant, other than lead a group of men. What kind of strategies was he supposed to come up with anyway?

"I do not believe that is any of your business, Major Heindrickschmeier," Ludwig answered for Feliciano. His blue eyes then looked over at the young Italian, who looked as if he had just been awakened from a deep sleep. He wondered if Feliciano even paid attention to what was going on during the briefing. "Lieutenant Vargas and I planned together. We have a joint strategy, and that is all you need to know about it."

Once again, Feliciano felt indebted to Ludwig. He wondered if Ludwig really had come up with a joint strategy just in case this would happen. If Ludwig had done that, he knew that he would have to thank him later for it. After all, since Feliciano had been so rude to him earlier, he would really need to kiss up to him once more.

.

When they reached their destination, Feliciano got out of the truck and looked around. He could barely feel his legs and nearly fell. That was never a good sign. Damn those rides for being so long! He stumbled a little but regained his balance before walking over to Ludwig, grabbing his sleeve and pulling him over to a spot where no one was.

"How did you know I wouldn't have a strategy?" he asked him. His eyes narrowed, yet at the same time he was curious. It was more like a pissed off curious, though.

"I would rather not say why knew," Ludwig stated. "Just call it intuition." He sighed. This was the last conversation he wanted to be having with Feliciano. There was no way he was going to tell the Italian that he always came up with joint strategies for them because he knew that the young Lieutenant was irresponsible. "Can we please skip talking about this for now?"

"We'll talk about it later then," Feliciano stated. "So what is the strategy?"

"What we're doing here is picking up more supplies from our sources in Switzerland," the Colonel told him. "We just have to make sure that those damned Allied Forces don't interfere at all. If they do, we need to stop them."

"S-Stop them?" the Italian asked.

"With our guns," Ludwig answered with a nod. He saw the look of devastation on Feliciano's face and just wanted to hold him. "But the sooner we start the process, the sooner we can leave here. The sooner we leave here, the less of a chance we have of running into the Allies."

Feliciano nodded. "Right. Got it. Let's move out then." He walked over to his troops and gave them the commands to follow him along to the checkpoint and keep their guns at the ready. "Men, be on your guard!" he called out to his soldiers. "We never know where the enemy may be!"

Ludwig, walking next to Feliciano, cast him a discreet smile. Though the Lieutenant was an airhead a lot of the time, when it came to keeping his men safe, he was always at the top of his game. He was proud of how responsible the Italian had become since joining the military a few years back. It was amazing to see how much of a change there really was.

The Italian's eyes scanned the area. There was no such thing as being too careful in a situation such as the one they were in. The lives of his men were on him. These men were his responsibility, and he was going to make sure that they all made it back safely. That was the very least he could do for them.

He looked over at Ludwig and noticed the smile. His heart nearly skipped a beat. What was the smile for? It made him happy, to say the least, but he didn't understand what the smile was for. Either way, it relaxed him a little and made him feel slightly better. Maybe this mission really would go well. After all, most missions went without a single problem. So why wouldn't this one?

Ludwig walked up to a man with longer blond hair and bright green eyes. " _Hallo, Vash_ ," he said with a nod. "What do you have for us?"

The man, Vash, pointed over to a pile of crates. "I have these crates for you," he stated in English, his accent from a country that Feliciano couldn't identify. "Two men to each crate. They are quite heavy. But you might want to hurry. People may start getting suspicious if you lurk for too long."

" _Danke_ ," Ludwig said with a nod. He whistled to his men and gave the commands for them to take the crates. "Lieutenant Vargas, your men will be on guard while my men carry."

"Got it," Feliciano said with a nod. His eyes scanned the area. "The area seems safe now. All right, men, let's move out!" He began to lead the way back to the caravan, which was parked about half a kilometer away.

He was being extremely wary of everything around himself. There could be no slip-ups. If one man was lost, it would be his fault. Feliciano felt he couldn't handle the pressure, but he knew that he had to. Why did he need to be promoted? He was just fine with being a Major. Was he sure that being a Lieutenant was something he could do? He could barely handle being Major Vargas. How could he handle being Lieutenant Vargas?

.

Just as they finished loading the last of the crates, Feliciano saw it in the distance. He tugged on Ludwig's sleeve. "Colonel, we need to go, and we need to go now," he quickly said. "They're here."

Ludwig looked out and he saw it as well. "Shit!" he shouted. "Everyone, load onto the trucks! This is not a drill! They are coming!" He was rushing and ushering everyone into the trucks as fast as he could. "Get in! Get in!"

Feliciano's heart was pounding, but he couldn't let his fear freeze him up. He couldn't let that happen. If he froze up, he knew he was dead. His heart couldn't stop racing, and his head felt like it was spinning. Vertigo was overtaking him. There was so much going on all at once. He didn't know what to do, though he knew what he had to do.

"...gas!" Ludwig called. "You need to get in the truck! They're almost within shooting range!" He grabbed Feliciano by the arm and dragged him into the truck with him.

The Italian didn't know what to do. He felt as if his arm would fall off. He couldn't believe that he had frozen up like that. There was no way that he could ever live this down. He was going to get demoted for sure!

"Lieutenant Vargas, don't do that again!" Ludwig shouted at him in the back of the truck as it took off. "You had us all worried when you refused to move! You can't freeze up like that on the battlefield! Has your training taught you nothing?!" He couldn't believe that Feliciano had let them all down like that, and he couldn't believe that he was still yelling and making matters even worse. "You can't do that!"

"Stop yelling at me!" Feliciano suddenly shouted back, turning to Ludwig with tear-filled eyes. "I'm sorry, okay?! Just stop fucking yelling at me!" He knew he couldn't cry in front of all of these men. He would never be able to live it down.

The whole back of the truck immediately fell silent. No one had ever seen Feliciano yell at Ludwig before. Even Feliciano himself was shocked by it. He had never lost his cool with a superior officer like that before. The silence was nearly deafening. Everyone was feeling the anxiety of not knowing what would happen next.

After a few moments, Ludwig turned to Feliciano and stiffly stated, "I hope you realize the severity of your actions back there."

"I do," Feliciano choked out. "Trust me. I do." All he wanted to do at that moment was curl up and die, but he knew that he couldn't. He knew he had to face the consequences of getting scared. But he had never felt fear like that before. Was that even normal? Was it reasonable to even be that scared?

Feliciano didn't like being so scared, having always been so fearless. He didn't know what suddenly made him such a coward. There were things he didn't seem to understand. And judging from Ludwig's reaction right now, he knew that the German wouldn't help him out at all when it came to Roeder. His heart sunk as he realized he was most likely going to be demoted.

"Why is it that the bad things happen only happen on missions I'm on?" Feliciano quietly asked.

"Have you ever thought that maybe it's just you?" a soldier asked.

The Italian felt a wave of betrayal hit him when Ludwig made no effort to correct him.

.

When they returned to the base and unloaded, Feliciano tried to escape Ludwig's eye and hurry away, but Ludwig would not allow that. He wanted to know what had happened out there that caused the young Lieutenant to freeze up like that, whether the Italian knew what had caused it or not. He didn't just want to know; he needed to know.

"A word, Lieutenant Vargas," Ludwig said, walking over to him.

Feliciano sighed, turning to him. "Look, I really don't feel like-"

"This time it's my turn to not care," Ludwig said. "Come with me." He led the way down the hall, checking every now and then to see if Feliciano was following after, which he was, slowly but surely. He stopped at an office and opened the door, nodding inside. "Go in and have a seat."

The Italian did as told, stomach doing flips inside of him. He didn't want to talk to Ludwig about the incident so soon after it happened. He was almost certain he was going to fall apart the moment Ludwig shut the door of the office. It was all building up inside of him.

"I didn't mean it," Feliciano softly said the moment he heard the click of the door shutting. "I was just so nervous. You didn't believe in me, so I didn't believe in myself…"

"Is that was this all comes down to?" Ludwig asked, standing before Feliciano. "Me not believing in you? Feliciano, I always believe in you. It's you who doesn't believe in yourself. I thought you were going to do well today. You sabotaged yourself and now you may have to pay a hefty price for it."

The Lieutenant looked down at his feet. "I know," he softly said. "I was scared, okay? I was scared, and I have no idea why I was. It was a strange feeling, and I never want it to happen again." Tears pricked at the corners of his eyes once more. He didn't understand why he was getting so emotional over it. It wasn't like he cared about his rank in the military anyway.

Ludwig put a hand on his shoulder. "I know you can do anything you put your mind to. You just had one slip-up today. It was your first mission in months. I will vouch for you if you would like me to."

Feliciano looked up at him. "You would do that for me?" he asked, stunned. He blinked his bronze eyes in shock. "You really mean it?"

"Of course," the German answered with a nod. "It won't happen again, right?"

"I really hope not," Feliciano told him. "It wasn't even supposed to happen today."

Ludwig smiled. "Then I will stand up for you as long as you swear to me that it will never happen again."

"I swear it," Feliciano answered with a nod. All he could do was hope that he could keep his word on that.


	12. Chapter 12

_A/N: Review if you enjoy it!_

.

Feliciano felt his heart racing as he watched Ludwig walk into Roeder's office. He knew that Ludwig would stick up for him, but he still couldn't help but feel doom as he watched him walk in there by himself. The Italian knew he should be at Ludwig's side, but he just couldn't do it! He was too scared…

"You worthless coward," he snarled to himself. "That's all you are, and I hope one day you get shot for being so worthless." Once more, Feliciano's eyes pricked with tears. Why couldn't he just do one thing right without Ludwig's help? Why couldn't things just be that simple?

He leaned heavily against the wall and slid down it, feeling sick to his stomach. There was nothing he could do to feel better, and he knew that. All he could do was wait for Ludwig to come out of Roeder's office with the news of whether he had been demoted or not. But not knowing was nearly killing Feliciano on the inside. He _had_ to know!

Minutes passed like hours to Feliciano until Ludwig finally stepped out of the office and walked over. "Well you're not in trouble," he simply said. "Roeder sees no need to demote you for one slip-up that could've happened to anyone. All he says is to make sure it never happens again."

Feliciano nodded. " _Grazie_ , Ludwig. I really owe you one."

Ludwig waved it off. "It's nothing, Feliciano. Just remember that it's a favor I did you, though. Please don't taint my word by messing up again." He placed a hand on the Italian's shoulder. "I'm putting my full trust in you from today onward. Just remember that I believe in you. I always have, and I always will."

The Lieutenant looked up at his superior officer with tears in his eyes. "I won't let you down, Colonel Beilschmidt," he softly said. "Never in a million years will I allow myself to let you down."

"Let's hope not," the German sighed. "Now how about we go and get lunch. I heard them call it while I was in Roeder's office."

Feliciano blinked in surprise. "They called lunch?"

"Well that's a first," Ludwig commented. "You always know when it's a meal time. Were you really that worried?" He chuckled when his companion blushed. "Come on, Lieutenant Vargas, let's go and get some food." He used the hand on Feliciano's shoulder to lead him toward the cafeteria. "I know you're probably just about starving. You always are."

Feliciano smiled sheepishly at him. "You just know me so well, don't you?"

"Like the back of my hand, Lieutenant Vargas."

.

That night, Feliciano found himself wandering the halls looking for Ludwig after all of the other soldiers had gone to bed. He wondered if he would even find him anywhere. If Ludwig was awake, he would take him out to that hill where they usually went at night so no one would disturb them. Tonight was a night where he definitely didn't want to be disturbed while thanking Ludwig for his kindness.

Just as he rounded another corner, he saw a flash of blond hair and the familiar build of Ludwig in front of him. He cleared his throat loudly as the German turned toward him, surprised. Ludwig's blue eyes were fully alert for a moment before softening when he realized that it was Feliciano that he was looking at.

"Good evening, Feliciano," Ludwig greeted, looking over at him. "Is something on your mind?" He walked over to the young Italian and half-smiled at him. "You seem pensive. Would you like to talk?"

The Lieutenant nodded. "But not here," he quickly said. "Come with me."

As soon as he saw Feliciano heading toward the back door, Ludwig instantly knew where they were going. "You want to go there?" He watched Feliciano nod. "But why?"

"I want to thank you for today, but not where anyone can see us, if you get the hint," the Lieutenant responded with a wink.

That was all Ludwig needed to know. His heart began to race as he followed along after the Italian. He knew that he was going to receive pleasure, and he couldn't wait to. It was going to be a magical experience, and a loving moment between him and Feliciano. Those moments seemed so rare those days, that he tended to miss them.

Halfway to the hill, Ludwig reached out and grabbed Feliciano's hand, stroking it lightly with his thumb. He smiled gently at his lover and let him lead the way to their special place, where it seemed only the two of them existed.

Once to the hill, Feliciano turned to face Ludwig. "You are the most wonderful human being on this planet. You are aware of that, right?" he asked. He walked over to his Colonel and batted his eyes at him. "How could I ever thank you enough?"

Ludwig placed his hands on Feliciano's waist and pulled him closer. "I'm sure if we put our heads together we could think of something."

"What a fantastic idea," the Italian said with a grin before pressing his lips to Ludwig's in a feverish way. He smiled into the kiss, wrapping his arms around his superior officer's shoulders and pulling him closer.

Ludwig deepened the kiss moments later, smiling as well. He had never felt a feeling like this before without Feliciano by his side. Was it only Feliciano who made him feel this way? Either way, he loved feeling this way and never wanted it to end.

Feliciano's eyes fluttered open as they pulled apart. "Wow, Ludwig," he softly said. "I've never been kissed like that by anyone but you. And to be honest, I never want to be kissed like that by anyone else." He flashed Ludwig a drunken smile and giggled a little. "You're so good to me."

The Colonel smiled at the Lieutenant. "I only aim to please the one I adore," he answered. He winked at the Italian and pulled him in for another kiss, which the other quickly accepted.

Ludwig began to feel his pants growing tighter and tighter as they kissed. He was becoming more and more aroused by the second. He needed to do something about it. Reaching down as they kissed, he began to fiddle with his belt and the button of his pants. He needed a bit of release.

Feliciano noticed what Ludwig was doing and maneuvered his hands to help him. His quickly got the Colonel's pants undone and his length released before dropping down to his knees. He took Ludwig's length into his mouth and began licking and sucking.

Ludwig's soft moans could be heard as his knees began to feel weak. He began to lose all sense of time and space as Feliciano continued what he was doing.

Suddenly, out of nowhere, sirens could be heard coming from the base, waking the two out of their aroused states. Both of them were suddenly fully alert as Ludwig adjusted himself and re-buttoned and zipped his pants back up. As he re-fastened his belt, he looked to Feliciano.

"The base is under attack!" he quickly said. "We have to hurry back!"

As Ludwig turned to leave, Feliciano stood and grabbed his arm. "Under attack?! What do you mean?!"

"Those damn Allied Forces are here!" Ludwig turned to Feliciano. "Now is your chance to redeem yourself after earlier! You can do this!" He pressed a kiss to Feliciano's forehead. "Now come on, we need to defend our base!"

Feliciano's heart pounded in his chest as he took off after Ludwig. Was everything going to be okay?

.

When they reached the base, it was pure chaos everywhere. The sound of gunfire filled their ears as they neared it and the sounds of men shouting echoed in their heads. Feliciano almost covered his ears to try to block it out of his ears. They had entered a real warzone.

Feliciano almost froze up again, but he had to tell himself that he couldn't do it. He couldn't let Ludwig down again, not now, not ever. His jaw clenched and his eyes narrowed as he looked up at an enemy soldier who was coming near them. The enemy was unarmed, but Ludwig had trained Feliciano to carry a knife on him at all times. Now was his time to prove that Ludwig hadn't trained him for nothing.

The enemy soldier began to run at them, but Feliciano was faster. He ran right up to the soldier and whipped out his knife, slicing through the man's jugular before the man could even attack.

Seeing no other soldiers around them outside, Feliciano dropped to his knees for a moment, breathing heavily. The knife fell from his hand as his eyes looked to the corpse that laid a few feet from him.

Ludwig walked over to him and placed a hand on his shoulder. "Are you all right, Feliciano?" he asked him.

The Italian's eyes filled with tears. "Oh my fucking God," he softly said to himself. "I just fucking killed someone…"

"He was a bad man," Ludwig said. "He would have killed you if you hadn't killed him. Remember that."

"He was unarmed, Ludwig," Feliciano said, looking up at him. "And I killed him."

"You can't dwell on that. We have to go and fight, Lieutenant Vargas. Our men need us."

Feliciano reached up and gripped Ludwig's shirt in a death grip. "Ludwig, do you not understand?! _I just killed someone!_ How am I supposed to get over that so quickly?! I'm a murderer!"

"You're not a murderer, you're a hero," the German told him.

Hearing those words made Feliciano's heart shatter. Heroes didn't kill people. Heroes saved people. There was no way he could be a hero if he was impulsively going around killing unarmed men like this. What exactly was Ludwig's definition of a hero anyway? He sure didn't feel like a hero at that moment.

Ludwig helped Feliciano back to his feet. "Lieutenant Vargas, our men need us. Please contemplate your actions later. I need you to go into this without thinking and keep our men safe. Be their hero. Shoot the enemy first and ask questions later, do you understand me?"

Feliciano slowly nodded. "I can do that," he softly said. But would his empathy let him do that? There was only one way to find out.

As they walked into the base, they had to step over bodies of fallen men that were soaked in so much blood they couldn't tell what side they were even on. They picked their guns off of them and began to patrol around for enemy soldiers. And every time they found one, they would gun them down.

Though Feliciano didn't seem like one, he was a proficiently sharp shooter, the best in his class when he was training. He never missed once. His fellow men in his class would joke around, saying that he had the eyes of a hawk, which earned him the nickname of Private Feliciano "The Hawk" Vargas during training. It was no wonder he had made it to Major Vargas in no time at all.

Ludwig would cast Feliciano impressed looks every now and then when he saw him gun a man down, though he could tell that the Italian's heart was racing. On the outside, Feliciano seemed completely calm, but anyone who knew the Italian knew that he was actually freaking out. The German was one who knew him the best out of anyone there.

"Retreat!" the enemy soldiers began to call as they tried to make their way out of the base. They all began running for exits, any exit they could find. Some didn't make it out of Feliciano's line of sight and were soon joining the bodies on the floor.

And when it was all over, Feliciano was once again breathing heavily as he fell back to his knees. "Please," he softly begged Ludwig. "Don't ever make me do that again…."

.

The next morning, Feliciano watched as his men cleared out the bodies. As much as he didn't want to watch, he knew that he had to. And there were _so many_ bodies. Most of them were enemy soldiers, but some of them belonged to men who were in his squadron. He felt sick watching, but he had no choice but to. The men needed to be supervised by superior officers.

He never felt more relieved when he heard himself and Ludwig being called to General Roeder's office. Though he was terrified of the man, anything was better than watching his own men clean up the remains of the mess he had made the night before. There was no way he could keep watching as the men dragged out body after body.

Feliciano ran into Ludwig on the way to the office and looked over at him. He could tell that Ludwig hadn't slept after what had happened the previous night either. "I wonder what the General wants," he softly said, trying to avoid looking at the bloodstains all over the floor. "What do you think it is?"

"You know how quickly word gets around here," Ludwig tiredly answered. "I'm sure everyone heard that 'The Hawk' is back." He gave Feliciano a sympathetic look. "I'm sorry, but he'll probably want to put you in more combat situations."

The Italian's blood suddenly ran cold. He didn't enter the military to kill people. He didn't ever want to kill another person. He didn't want to be "The Hawk"! He wanted to be Feliciano! There was no way in hell that he ever wanted to become a killing machine for the military! He felt weak as they neared the office.

The German Colonel opened the door and gestured for Feliciano to enter with him. "After you, Lieutenant," he simply said.

Feliciano took a deep breath and walked into the office, Ludwig following after him. "You wanted to see me, sir?" he asked.

Roeder turned away from his window to face them. "I heard about your heroic acts last night," he simply said. "There were more fatalities from the two of you than anyone else in the base last night, especially Lieutenant Vargas. Tell me, Vargas, how did you receive you nickname 'The Hawk' during training?"

"I was told I had the eyes of a hawk during target practice," the Italian answered. "I guess it's true." He shrugged indifferently. "What does my nickname during training have to do with this present day?"

"Lieutenant Vargas, do you know how many lives you saved last night?" Roeder asked. "Without you, the base would've been taken over, and all of the men would have died. You took care of the men, and Colonel Beilschmidt had your back covered from what I heard. I am proud of the two of you, and you shall receive medals when the war is said and done."

Feliciano blinked in surprise. "What?"

"You two stopped a base invasion nearly by yourselves," Roeder answered. "Why wouldn't you get medals? We lost sixteen men last night. The Allied Forces lost about sixty."

The Italian's eyes widened in shock, surprise, and horror. How many of those men had he killed himself? It made his stomach twist into a knot. He didn't even know the number of men he had killed. How could he ever be a real hero now? Those men he had killed had families who would never see them again…

"Lieutenant Vargas, you and Colonel Beilschmidt make an unstoppable team," Roeder said, a smile on his face. "I am going to look into getting you two into more combat."

"Thank you, General Roeder," Ludwig said, nodding to him. "You are so kind."

"You are welcome." Roeder smiled over at Ludwig and then Feliciano. "You two will make the perfect addition of the combat teams."

.

Feliciano laid awake in bed that night, wondering what combat would be like with other people. He hoped that Ludwig would still be by his side. If Ludwig wasn't there, he felt he would have no reason to fight anymore. Ludwig was the only thing keeping him motivated. They were a team, and he needed to stick by him to remain "The Hawk".

He stared up at the bunk above him and sighed aloud. He needed Ludwig by his side for other reasons, wanting to keep him safe. Everything he needed to do was for Ludwig. Everything was Ludwig to him. There was so much love in his heart for the German that he needed to stay by his side forever, whether the German wanted to stay by his side or not.

" _Ti amo_ ," he softly muttered, tracing a heart onto his blanket. His head was in the clouds as he thought of Ludwig and what they were doing just before the disaster of the night before. If there was one thing that could make things okay again, it was Ludwig.

There was nothing in the world Feliciano wanted more than to be by Ludwig's side forever. He wanted to receive Ludwig's love until the day he died. Whether it was on the battlefield or in his dream home on the countryside.


	13. Chapter 13

_Early August, 1942, Military Caravan_

Feliciano was not excited at all about his transfer. The more he thought about it, the sicker he felt. There was only one good thing about the transfer. Ludwig would be there. That was the only positive thing that Feliciano could think of. It was the only thing keeping his heart at ease.

"Is something bothering you, Lieutenant Vargas?" Ludwig asked, gently nudging Feliciano's arm with his elbow. Personally, Ludwig was more excited to be going to the combat teams. He had been wanting a real piece of the action ever since the war had started. Now was his chance to finally prove himself to his country, and he wasn't about to let it slip away.

"It's nothing," Feliciano sighed, shaking his head. "Just nerves is all." He crossed his arms over his chest and leaned lightly against the canvas behind him. "I'm just nervous about joining the combat teams."

"Why should you be nervous?" Ludwig questioned. "You're Feliciano 'The Hawk' Vargas. This should be easy and exciting for you."

"Yeah," the Italian softly said. "Exciting." He sighed and stared down at his feet, absently tapping his heels together. "You know, even hawks fly away at times, Colonel Beilschmidt."

Ludwig blinked as he realized what Feliciano meant. "You're not going to run, are you?" he asked. "You know the consequences of running, Lieutenant Vargas. It wouldn't be worth it."

Feliciano looked around at all of the soldiers in the caravan. They were all giving him concerned looks. "I'm not planning on running," he sighed. "It was just an expression, Colonel." He leaned his head back and closed his eyes. "I'm not going to run. I'm going to sit here and fulfill the duties that will be asked of me."

The German eyed his Italian companion questioningly. "You didn't want this, did you?" he finally asked after what felt like years of awkward, hushed whispering around them..

That was when Feliciano chose to keep his silence.

.

 _Early August, 1942, Russian Border_

Feliciano was shocked to find that he and Ludwig would be sharing a bunk bed. Ludwig chose the top bunk, keeping Feliciano's legs in mind. The Italian was more than grateful to have the bottom bunk, not knowing how he would climb up to the top bunk if he had been stuck with it. Though he was grateful to Ludwig, he didn't express his gratitude, mostly because he and Ludwig hadn't spoken since the discussion on the caravan earlier.

"I'm going to do some scouting of the area in my free time," Feliciano told Ludwig, finally summoning up the courage to speak with him again. "Maybe I can find a place like that one hill or something." He shrugged indifferently, or at least tried to make himself seem indifferent, not knowing how Ludwig's feelings on him were at the moment.

"That would be nice," Ludwig answered with a nod. "Would you like me to go with you?"

Feliciano felt his face instantly heat up with desire. "Sure, if you want to," he said, looking down at the floor. He was so flustered by Ludwig's offer that he could barely think straight. "When do you think we'll have free time anyway?"

"Well we do now, don't we?" Ludwig asked. "The regimen says we don't do anything until tomorrow. I mean, we probably have about a half hour left of daylight." He finished folding his jacket and placed it on the top bunk. "How about we get going?"

The Italian was eager to be alone with Ludwig, so he nodded and began to walk toward the door with him. At that moment, he wanted nothing more than to just be with Ludwig in a passionate embrace until the end of time. His mind began to wander as he thought of things he and Ludwig could do once they were alone.

Ludwig led the way out of the base, happy that no one was questioning where they were going or what they were going to be doing. That made it a lot easier to get away from everyone. As long as no one asked what they were up to, he was going to be fine with anything that Feliciano suggested.

The two found a small path that led into the woods before they stopped, sure that no one was going to see them if they walked by. Feliciano leaned against a tree and smiled at Ludwig, grabbing his hands. Ludwig smiled and leaned against the tree as well, facing Feliciano. They smiled at each other before their lips softly pressed together.

Feliciano's arms looped around Ludwig's shoulders. He opened his mouth as a small moan escaped his lips. His desire for Ludwig was growing. There was no way he could contain himself much longer. He needed more and more of Ludwig, or else he was going to go crazy.

The German's arms circled his lover's waist as he pulled him closer. One hand went down, caressing Feliciano's backside before lifting the Italian's leg to wrap around his hips. He moaned softly against his lover's lips, tangling his free hand in Feliciano's hair. "Feliciano," he whispered against the Italian's lips.

"I want you," Feliciano whispered back. "I need more of you." He pressed his body closer to Ludwig's in an attempt to arouse him even more. "Please, give me more, Colonel Beilschmidt. More than I've ever had before."

Ludwig broke off the kiss, confused. "More?" he asked. "What do you mean?"

Feliciano stood on his tip-toes to bring his lips to Ludwig's ear and whisper, "Sex."

The German's eyes widened. He had never gotten such a bold request from someone, especially Feliciano. But at just the mention of sex, his body felt like it went up in flames. Though he had never thought of having sex with Feliciano before, he wasn't opposed to the idea. But here? Now? Didn't that seem like a bit much at the moment?

"I don't think that's a wise idea right now," Ludwig panted to him. "Perhaps tomorrow would be better."

Feliciano couldn't help but feel slightly disappointed. "Why not, Ludwig? Please?" He wanted sex with Ludwig, but he didn't want to have to beg for it.

"We are not prepared for sex today," Ludwig answered. "Perhaps tomorrow. I'll gather things to prepare us."

"Prepare?" Feliciano asked him. "What do you mean by that?"

"We need a sort of lubricant," the German replied, "or it will be painful for you. And I would not want to cause you pain while we're having sex for the first time." He sighed. "I really wish to have sex with you today, but it just doesn't work."

Feliciano pouted a little but accepted it. "If you're sure," he sighed, frowning. "May I continue kissing you at least?"

To answer him, Ludwig pressed his lips to his lover's, eager to please the Italian. He smiled at Feliciano when he pulled away. "We can kiss as much as you want." And so they continued that until the sun went down.

.

Ludwig turned to Feliciano once they were back to their bunks. He could still see Feliciano's heated face as they kissed, even though the Italian looked back to normal at that point. The German just thought that something must be wrong with him or something. Why was he seeing Feliciano in such a way? Did he really want the Italian that badly? Was this a message from his body, telling him to take Feliciano back to the woods and have sex with him?

Feliciano looked up at Ludwig, confused. "Why are you looking at me like that?" he softly asked. "I don't understand." He looked around to see if anyone was watching before leaning in and whispering, voice barely audible, "You're the one who didn't want to have sex."

The German's eyes widened. So it was that obvious to Feliciano as well. He knew he had to do something about it. He leaned in and whispered to Feliciano, "Let's go back there later tonight. I'll find something we can use."

The Lieutenant's eyes widened, but he nodded to Ludwig. "Of course," he said, trying to sound official. "I will follow those orders, sir."

That only made Feliciano more desireable to Ludwig. He almost groaned to himself, nearly unable to wait until the night came along. After all, it would be the first time their bodies became one, and he couldn't wait for the magic of that to happen.

.

Ludwig woke Feliciano in the middle of the night, hiding a jar of cold cream in his pocket. He made sure his love stayed silent while they got prepared to go outside. Since it was going to be their first time having sex, he wanted it to be perfect. Absolutely nothing could go wrong. He had to make sure of that.

Feliciano scrubbed at his eyes with his sleeve as they walked to the path together. He yawned a little, hoping that Ludwig would just pounce on him and make him fully alert. All he needed was a nice wake-up call that he hoped Ludwig would give him.

The German pushed Ludwig against the tree, slightly rough, and kissed him deeply. It was just the wake-up call that Feliciano had been hoping for. Their bodies pressed together tightly, both gasping out for more as they removed their jackets to relieve themselves of some of the heat they were feeling. Soon, they were in nothing but their boxers, Ludwig holding the jar of cold cream and coating his fingers in it.

"Are you ready for this, Feliciano?" Ludwig asked him, panting for air. He was more than ready to finally do this, to become one with his love.

Feliciano took a deep breath and nodded, feeling Ludwig's strong hands venture down into the back of his underwear. He wrapped his arms around the German and whispered, "I love you," into his ear before hissing as one of Ludwig's fingers poked inside of him.

Ludwig's eyes widened immediately. "Am I hurting you, Feliciano?" he quickly asked in shock. The last thing he wanted to do was hurt Feliciano while making love to him! That would truly be terrible. "Please say you're okay!"

Feliciano chuckled to himself. "I'm fine, Ludwig," he softly moaned. "It was just a little cold from the cold cream is all." He kissed his lover deeply. "That's all."

Relieved, Ludwig gently poked another finger into Feliciano. "If it hurts, we can stop."

"I don't want to stop," the Italian lustfully whispered into Ludwig's ear. "I want all of you tonight, and that's what you're going to give me, right?" He reached down into Ludwig's underwear and began to stroke his member.

" _Mein Gott_ ," Ludwig moaned out. "You're getting it, that's for sure."

"Good," Feliciano moaned. He arched his back and moaned once more. "I need more of you, Ludwig. And I need it now."

Ludwig nodded, understanding what his lover meant. He then proceeded to give Feliciano exactly what he was asking for late into the night.

.

The next morning, Feliciano felt a bit sore as he got out of his bunk, but to him it was worth it. He had finally done it. After all of those years, he had finally made love with the man he had had his heart set on since day one. It was like a dream come true for him. He almost wanted to sing, but that would make it too obvious that something happened between them.

In the mess hall, someone was playing a song on the radio, and Ludwig rolled his eyes, hearing which song it was. It was that damned song that Feliciano had been singing around the base so long ago. He really hoped that Feliciano wouldn't hear it, but at the same time he secretly wanted to. He liked seeing his lover so happy.

Feliciano sat down across from Ludwig and grinned. "Do you hear what song is playing?" His grin widened as he burst out into song.

" _Maybe you'll ask me to come back again,_

 _And maybe I'll say maybe!_ "

Ludwig even cracked a smile. "How do you even know that song?"

"My _nonno_ loved that music group when I was growing up, so I heard their songs a lot." Feliciano smiled and bit into his toast. "It makes me think of him when I hear this music. I remember when Lovi learned this song on the guitar! We had so much fun dancing and singing to it with _Nonna_ when she was alive!" His smile faded. "A lot will have changed when I go home after this war."

"What do you mean by that?" Ludwig asked him. "Is it because everyone will treat you different for being a hero?"

Feliciano shook his head. "My grandmother died about a month after I came to Berlin for training. She was what held out family together and made us all proud of who we were. Now that she's gone, I don't know what life at home will be like when I got back. I'm almost scared to find out."

"Then why not come home with me?" Ludwig asked.

The Italian looked up at him. "Do what?" He was completely shocked. Did his lover really just offer for them to return from the war and live together? It were almost as if he couldn't believe his ears. Ludwig really wanted them to stick together! What an offer!

"I said, you can always come home with me if you'd like," he said. "We've grown close enough, I'd say."

"I wouldn't want to be without you," Feliciano softly admitted so no one else could hear. "But what will I do about _Nonno_ and Lovi? They would be crushed if I didn't return to them!"

"We could always visit them," Ludwig suggested. "I've heard Italy is nice during certain times of the year."

"Oh, it's wonderful!" Feliciano enthused. His head was spinning. Ludwig really wanted to be with him! Inside his chest, his heart was soaring and he could barely contain his joy. He felt like singing and dancing. "I think you would really like it, Colonel Beilschmidt!"

"Then maybe I will go with you sometime," Ludwig said, remembering where they were and trying to sound professional. "It sounds wonderful."

"Oh, just you wait and see for yourself!" Feliciano enthused. And just like that, he couldn't wait for the war to be over.

.

The rest of the day, Feliciano's head was up in the clouds with thoughts of Ludwig. He even forgot to pay attention during training just because he was too preoccupied, yet when he was handed a gun, he shot the targets with excellent precision.

Ludwig was highly impressed with Feliciano's performance, knowing the other was spacey. He cheered along with the rest of the men when "The Hawk" came out. It always impressed him to see the other side of Feliciano, even if the Italian didn't like that side of himself. "The Hawk" was an extremely talented marksman that Ludwig was glad loved him and no one else.

After target practice, Feliciano was swarmed by his fellow men, surprised to see that so many of them were impressed with him. To him, it was really nothing at all, but he figured it was a big deal to them. He accepted their congratulations and walked over to Ludwig. "Pretty impressive, huh?" he asked.

"You'd do even better if your head wasn't in the clouds," Ludwig commented.

The Italian turned to him and stared up at his blue eyes. "Well who put my head there in the first place?" he quietly demanded so no one else could hear.

Ludwig chuckled to himself. "You make a valid point," he agreed. With a nod, he looked down at Feliciano for a moment, into his bronze eyes. "You are quite talented, Lieutenant Vargas. I'll give you that."

"Thank you, Colonel Beilschmidt," Feliciano answered, saluting his superior officer. "It makes me glad to hear you say such kind words like that to me."

The German almost smiled, but decided not to. Not while there were soldiers still around. He couldn't let them see him flirt with Feliciano, for fear that they would catch on to his relationship with the young Lieutenant. That would be bad for both of them if they did.

"Why do you look so serious all of a sudden?" Feliciano asked, cocking his head to the side in confusion. "I don't understand. It's always like this with you. One second, we'll be having and enjoyable conversation, and the next you're too serious to let it be enjoyable anymore."

Ludwig hoped that one day Feliciano would understand.


	14. Chapter 14

_A/N: Michelangelo is Seborga._

.

 _Late September, 1942, Russian Border_

Feliciano didn't like how cold it was starting to get. He was used to nice weather, not this biting wind that came from Siberia. If he wasn't careful, he would get sick, and that wouldn't be good at all. Ludwig would probably get angry with him for being careless.

But that wasn't the only thing that was troubling the young Italian. Things were quiet there. Too quiet. He knew he should be expecting an attack any day, but with every day that passed with no attacks, he was starting to let his guard down, something a soldier should never do. Feliciano was starting to worry. What if there was another attack like the one at his last base? Would he have to slaughter even more men? Just the thought of that terrified him. What was he supposed to do? The men he killed had families just like he did.

"Is something bothering you, Lieutenant Vargas?" Ludwig asked, pulling on his gloves as he walked over. He was all bundled up in his uniform for the cold, leaving Feliciano to wonder how warm he would be if he followed Ludwig's instruction on bundling up as well.

"Nothing really," Feliciano admitted with a sigh as he pulled on his gloves to make them tighter around his hands. "You see, I have a lot going on in my head. There is just so much all jumbled up in there." He thumped the side of his head with his hand a couple times. "Don't mind me. I'm just thinking a lot."

"Well don't think too hard," Ludwig laughed, "you might hurt yourself."

"Very funny," his lover grumbled at him, crossing his arms over his chest to get warm, but making it also look like a pout.

"What are you thinking about?" Ludwig asked, walking up behind him. "Perhaps I could help ease your mind."

Feliciano sighed. "It's been quiet here lately," he answered, "too quiet. Don't you think so? It's like the Allies are just waiting for us to get nice and comfortable before they attack. Well it's not working for me. I'm constantly on edge!" He uncrossed his arms and threw his hands in the air. "It's just not fair, Ludwig. I can barely even sleep at night anymore because I'm just waiting for that surprise attack."

Ludwig hummed his understanding and then sighed. "Feliciano, sleep is important. You can't be losing sleep over trivial matters such as this, because we don't even know if they _will_ attack or not."

Just as Ludwig finished his sentence, there was a gunshot and his arm was suddenly stained red. Feliciano was instantly alert as he picked up a nearby gun and faced the direction that the gunshot came from. He couldn't detect any form of movement anywhere, but that just made him even more nervous.

"Get down and stay down," he hissed to Ludwig, stepping in front of him to protect him. "Hopefully it will all be over soon." Another gunshot was fired from nearby, but Feliciano detected where it came from and rained bullets on the area, hearing a couple men fall to the ground, presumably dead. His heart was beating at the speed of light, but he knew he needed to remain calm for Ludwig's sake.

Feliciano slowed his breath as he examined his surroundings. He could sense enemies nearby yet nowhere at the same time. It was unnerving, almost as if he were waiting for them to surround him. Where were all of the damned troops? Why were he and Ludwig the only ones out in the open like this? What was going on? Were the other troops afraid to come out and fight? Never in his life had Feliciano felt more alone and afraid.

He would attempt to call out to his other troops, but at this rate, no one would hear him. If they hadn't heard the gunshots, how would they ever hear a human voice? His heart beat faster and faster until it was nearly jumping out of his chest. He wasn't scared anymore. He was terrified for his life.

There was a snap of a twig behind him and a gunshot. A sharp pain tore through Feliciano's abdomen. _This is the end_ , he thought to himself. _This is how I go. A hero to only Ludwig on a deserted battlefield._

He fell to his knees as he heard his other troops coming. Feliciano placed a hand over the wound to try to stop the bleeding, but it hurt too bad. Nothing was making sense anymore as his vision was starting to go black. What else was there to do but hold on the best he could by that point?

Here he was, bleeding out on the battlefield while Ludwig laid on the ground next to him. At least he would die next to Ludwig. That was what he cared about. His eyes searched for his lover, but Ludwig was no longer on the ground. He had lost his love in the sea of men. And as his eyes drifted shut, he couldn't help but feel sad.

.

Feliciano's eyes slowly fluttered open in an infirmary once more. How long had he been asleep? What day was it? What time was it? What was going on? Wasn't he supposed to have died? Last he remembered, he was bleeding out on the battlefield. Was this what Heaven looked like? Certainly it wouldn't look like an infirmary!

Ludwig walked in and stared at Feliciano for a moment before sitting down next to him. "That was a really stupid thing you did, Feliciano," he simply said. "Both of us could've died. You almost did. Why didn't you go and get help? You didn't have to take them all on by yourself! What would you have expected me to do if you would have…" His voice trailed off for a moment as he regained his composure, tears in his eyes. "You have no idea how happy I am that you are awake…."

"What's going on?" Feliciano asked, confused. "I remember getting shot, but I don't remember anything after that."

"You nearly bled out, Feliciano," he said, sitting next to his lover in the chair by his bed. "The doctor said you might not even wake up. But I didn't want to believe that. You're one of the best men we have. I couldn't just let you die. That wouldn't be fair." A single tear trickled down Ludiwg's cheek. "I couldn't lose you. Not like that."

Feliciano smiled weakly at him. "I'm right here, Ludwig," he softly said. "I'm not going anywhere. It'll take a lot more than that to kill someone like me, that's for damn sure." He laughed faintly, but it hurt his stomach to do so. "How long have I been asleep?"

"You've been out for a few days now," the German answered. "No one was sure if you were going to make it or not. I'm glad you pulled through, though. I need my Lieutenant Vargas by my side. Things would never be the same without you."

"Never," Feliciano agreed, reaching a hand out to him.

Since they were the only two in the infirmary, Ludwig held Feliciano's hand with both of his, smiling at his lover. No more words needed to be said between the two for the time being. Everything else that needed to be said was being told through the looks they were giving each other. The two lovers needed each other in their lives.

"Is your arm still hurting?" Feliciano asked after awhile of gazing into Ludwig's perfect, blue eyes.

"It feels better now," Ludwig answered with a small smile. "The bullet only grazed it, that's all." He rolled up his sleeve to show Feliciano the white bandage on his forearm. "See? I'm perfectly fine. It was you that I was worried about. That bullet got you good. And when I saw what it had done to you, I went and rained hell down on all of those Allies."

"You did?" Feliciano asked. "Why?"

"Because no one does something like that to the one I love," Ludwig softly said. "Feliciano, I thought I had lost you. I couldn't see or think straight. I thought you were dead. It was the worst feeling in the world, and I wouldn't ever want to experience it again, having already experienced it twice so far."

"Twice?" Feliciano asked him, confused. "When was the first time, if you don't mind me asking."

"You mean to tell me you don't remember the little fall you took when you broke both of your legs?" Ludwig asked him. "How your brother just let you fall two stories onto your legs?"

Feliciano suddenly remembered and frowned. "Oh yeah," he sighed. How could he have forgotten the day he found out that he truly was a bad guy and not a hero? "Let's not talk about that day," he simply said. "Let's celebrate wellness for both of us."

"And how would you suggest that?" the German asked, raising an eyebrow to him.

Feliciano reached over and grabbed his lover's tie, pulling him down to his level before wrapping his arms around his shoulders and kissing him passionately. "I love you," he whispered against Ludwig's lips. "I always have, and I always will. _Ti amo_ , Ludwig."

" _Ich liebe dich_ ," he simply said before deepening the kiss. "Forever."

The Italian almost hummed with delight and smiled into the kiss. He had never been so in love with someone before, and now was he chance to experience it for himself; for better or worse, in sickness and in health. His heart raced as Ludwig's tongue lapped against his. Everything about that moment was perfect. And he didn't want anything to ever change.

.

"Feeling better, Lieutenant?" General Mueller, his newest General to follow, asked, walking into the infirmary a day or two later. "I see that you woke up and joined us back here on earth. Welcome back. What you did was a very brave deed for all of us. You held off the enemy so we had time to surround them. That took guts, Vargas. I'm promoting you to Colonel."

"You're what?" Feliciano asked in disbelief. "What do you mean?" He was really getting promoted again, and so soon?

"What can I say, you deserve it," General Mueller stated. "Vargas, we have never seen anything like you in our military. You're like a completely different person when it comes to battle. Tell me, what is your secret to that?"

"I'm more concentrated in combat," he answered. "I don't let the enemy get to me. They're people, just like me. Why should I let the fact that they have a weapon intimidate me if I have one as well?"

"I like the way you think, Colonel Vargas!" General Mueller enthused. "You are a fantastic soldier, and I applaud you! I wish for a speedy recovery for you, so that we can have you back out on the field. We need more men like you."

"Well, it was Colonel Beilschmidt who trained me," Feliciano sheepishly replied. "He taught me everything I know about combat. Perhaps you should have him train some more troops?"

"How about I have both of you do it instead? It will get more troops prepared," the General stated. "You see, Colonel Beilschmidt can only teach so many men at a time. It's the same with you. If I have both of you teaching at the same time, our army will be unstoppable in no time!"

Feliciano gulped, unsure of how to feel about that. "Okay, I'll do it," he told him. He really didn't want to, but there was no way he could deny a superior officer a request like that, especially right after getting promoted. Yet something was gnawing at him. How was he supposed to train these men if he didn't agree with what they fought for?

.

 _Late December, 1942, Russian Border_

Feliciano had just about had enough of the military and teaching the men these exercises to make them calm in every situation. It was bothering him a lot. Why couldn't they see that they were the bad guys? They weren't heroes! And with every group of men he taught, he wanted to yell at them, but then they would probably question his reasoning. It was too complicated to explain, so he always kept his mouth shut, wishing that someone would understand him when he said they were the bad guys.

"Colonel Vargas," a young Italian soldier asked him one day after training, "how do we know who is right and who is wrong in this war?"

"What do you mean?" Feliciano asked, turning to him. The young soldier had hair that was an even brighter auburn than his own and bright green eyes. "What makes you think these things all of a sudden?"

"I get that we're supposed to be the good guys," the soldier explained, "but lately I feel like we're not. For example, what happens to the people we take prisoner? Where do they go? No one has ever explained that to me before. They did nothing wrong other than exist in the wrong place at the wrong time."

Feliciano felt as if he were looking into a mirror and talking to a younger version of himself. "I honestly have no idea what happens to them," he answered. "But I do know that we can all be heroes in our own way."

"How?" the young soldier asked, pained. He seemed really torn up about the whole situation of no longer being a "good guy". It tugged at his superior officer's heart.

"We can try to save the ones we love," Feliciano answered. "That's all that we can do. Fight for your family. Fight for everyone you love. You can never go wrong when it's love that you're fighting for. Remember that."

"But what if I have no one to love?" he asked. "I'm still pretty young. I was only drafted here about a month ago when I turned eighteen. I don't understand the military, and I still don't get why I'm here. I want to go home."

The older Italian gave him a pitying look. "Try not to focus too much on the negative, kid," he decided to say. "If you do, things will only get worse from there, trust me on that. Find something or someone worth fighting for, and have that be your motivation."

"But how do I know if it's what's right?"

Feliciano smiled. "Your heart will tell you."

The young soldier smiled at him. "Thanks, Colonel! I appreciate it!"

"No problem, Private, er…."

"Vargas," he answered. "Private Michelangelo Vargas." He beamed proudly. "I guess our names have pride attached to them, huh?"

"I guess they do," Feliciano said with a bright smile.

.

For the rest of the evening, Feliciano couldn't get Michelangelo Vargas out of his head. Could they possibly be related somewhere down the line? What was the purpose of their conversation? Was it a sort of fate-decided thing? Was Michelangelo supposed to represent a younger Feliciano? If so, they why did they both exist? All of the questions in Feliciano's head were maddening.

"What's going on?" Ludwig asked him after they had made love that night. "You seemed preoccupied with something the whole time."

"I could've sworn I met myself from the past today," Feliciano thought aloud to Ludwig, leaning against him. "It was so strange. I never thought someone would share the same views as me on pretty much everything."

"And where did you meet this person?" Ludwig asked him, raising an eyebrow and putting an arm around him.

"He's one of my troops," Feliciano answered. "His last name is even Vargas! Can you believe that?" He whistled low. "It's insane, Ludwig!"

Ludwig hummed noncommittally. "So what are you thinking about this guy?" he asked, jealousy evident in his voice.

"I'm wondering if he's a long-lost relative of mine or something," Feliciano said. He sensed slight jealousy, so he turned to Ludwig and kissed him. "Don't worry, I don't think of him in the same way that I think of you." He cupped Ludwig's face in his hands. "I swear, you get so defensive over nothing sometimes."

"I do?" Ludwig asked him, huffing out. "Well if I do it's because of the way you talk about people to me."

"But you should hear the way I talk about you to them," Feliciano answered in a dreamy voice. "I don't talk about anyone else the way I talk about you, my love."

"You expect me to believe that?" the German asked him. "Right."

"Why are you getting so defensive right now?" Feliciano asked, moving away from his lover. "I don't understand why you're acting this way."

"Because you were thinking about someone else while we were making love," Ludwig grumbled. "That's supposed to be a time for us, Feliciano, not us and whoever else you have on your mind. Don't you get that?" He stormed off toward the base.

"Ludwig, please!" Feliciano softly called to him. "Come back! Let's talk about this!"

But the German didn't even turn to glance behind.


	15. Chapter 15

Things were tense between Ludwig and Feliciano for the next few days. Every time the Italian tried to talk to him, Ludwig would avoid conversation by going off to do something else. It frustrated Feliciano to the point of almost tearing his hair out. Why was his lover avoiding him? Was it because of Michelangelo? Really? Was Ludwig really _that_ jealous? This was just ridiculous.

"Colonel Beilschmidt!" Feliciano called to him as he was walking away one time. He ran after Ludwig. "What is your problem with me? I don't understand!"

Ludwig whirled around to face the other Colonel. "Do _not_ bring this up right here and now," he hissed at him. "Have you lost your damned mind?!"

Feliciano stood his ground. "Maybe I have," he simply said. "What are you going to do about it? You are no longer my superior officer, you know. I can talk to you about whatever I please whenever I please."

The other Colonel narrowed his eyes. "You've got some nerve, Colonel Vargas," he stated. "Let's go speak elsewhere." He turned on his heel and led Feliciano to an abandoned office. "Now, what is it you want with me?"

"Why are you avoiding me?" Feliciano asked. "What did I do wrong? Please just tell me so I can apologize and fix it."

"The fact that you don't see where you were in the wrong just baffles me," the German commented. "How could you _not_ see where you were in the wrong? It's blatantly obvious!"

"Please," the Italian said, trying to keep his cool, "just tell me, Ludwig." He clenched his jaw. "I won't understand if you won't tell me."

Ludwig held his silence for a good minute before huffing, "Fine, I'll tell you." He took a deep breath. "It's because you were thinking of someone else during the last time we were intimate together."

The young Italian could barely believe his ears. Ludwig was actually _jealous_? That was just insane and unheard of! "Don't tell me you're jealous," Feliciano probed, a curious look on his face.

"You thought about him during _sex_! Of course I'm jealous!" the German fumed. "How would you feel if I did something like that to you?!"

Feliciano thought about that for a moment. "Well I guess I wouldn't like that very much."

Ludwig crossed his arms over his chest. "I didn't think so."

"Look, I'm sorry," the young Colonel apologized. "I didn't mean to hurt your feelings, Ludwig. That's the last thing I'd ever want to do. You should know that by now. I would never do something to deliberately hurt your feelings." He fell silent for a moment before continuing. "I really am sorry, Ludwig."

He stood there with his arms crossed for awhile before wrapping them around Feliciano in a hug. "I'm sorry, too," he said.

Feliciano melted into Ludwig's embrace. " _Ti amo_."

" _Ich liebe dich_ ," he replied, kissing his lover's forehead. "Forever."

.

 _Three Weeks Later_

Training was going well, and Feliciano was finally getting used to being a leader. It still freaked him out to be in charge of so many men, but only a little. He was mostly worried about if his men would be prepared for an attack or not. It worried him to think about how Michelangelo would respond to an attack, since he still winced every time a gun went off. That was enough to make anyone worry for him.

"Private Vargas," Feliciano said, taking him aside, "let's talk for a moment." He led Michelangelo out of earshot of the other soldiers. "Are you prepared for an attack?"

Michelangelo's eyes went wide. "Please don't say something like that," he softly answered. "Just the thought of actual combat _right this second_ freaks me out, Colonel." He was quiet for a moment. "Why do you bring this up?"

"There's no telling when an attack will be," the older Italian explained. "It's my job to make sure that you're ready for any attack that may come our way. For God's sake, Private Vargas, this is war. You have to be on your toes at all times." He placed a comforting hand on Michelangelo's shoulder. "For all I know, they could attack during our conversation."

The younger Italian tensed up. "Please don't say that, Colonel Vargas."

Feliciano shrugged. "But it's the truth, whether you want to hear it or not. And let me tell you, they won't go easy on you at all. They'll gun you to shreds without a second thought. That's why I'm training you, to make sure you know what to do in an attack. If anything were to happen to you, or any of my other men, that would mean I failed this military, and I don't want that."

Michelangelo gulped. "I don't think anyone would want that, sir," he stated. "Especially me, because that means I'd be dead or something." The younger Italian shivered, terrified. "But if we talk about getting attacked, we might _actually_ get attacked, Colonel!"

"Would you be ready?" Feliciano asked him. He sighed as Michelangelo shook his head. "Come on, Vargas. What will prepare you?"

He held his head in his hands. "I have no idea; I'm terrified! Didn't you ever feel this way before?!"

"Of course I did," the Colonel stated matter-of-factly. "But I worked my way through it, just as you should."

Michelangelo was quiet for awhile. "What if I can't?" he asked. "What then?"

"Then you die," Feliciano casually stated. He gave the young Private a pitying look before saying, "That's why we're training you."

.

That night, an alarm sounded, waking Feliciano from his restless slumber. It could only mean one thing. The base was under siege! The first place Feliciano's mind went was to Michelangelo. He had to get to him, and fast!

Stumbling out of bed, Feliciano quickly got dressed. He didn't care how professional he looked; all that was on his mind was getting to Michelangelo before it was too late. His feet carried him as quickly as they could down the corridors to where Michelangelo should've been, but he wasn't there. He began to panic a little as he grabbed a random soldier.

"Where's Vargas?!" Feliciano demanded. He shook the soldier. "Answer me! Where is Private Vargas?! He's not combat-ready!"

"He went down the corridor toward the gun lock-up!" the panicked soldier answered.

"Fuck!" Feliciano shouted, letting go of the soldier. He took off running in the direction of Michelangelo. "Vargas!" he cried out. "Private Vargas, where are you?!" His eyes searched for the redhead, but he just couldn't find him. He pushed through the sea of soldiers to find Michelangelo. "Private Vargas!"

"Sir!" he heard Michelangelo call to him. "Colonel Vargas!" Moments later, the younger Italian pushed through the surging crowd. His eyes were wide with terror. "What do I do?!" He reached his superior officer, looking as if he were about to faint. "I-I can't do this, Colonel! I can't!"

"You're going to have to," Feliciano calmly told him, slightly raising his voice above the noise of the other troops. "I know you can do it, Michelangelo! I have faith in you!"

The young Private looked up at him, green eyes shining with pride. "You really think I can?" he asked.

"Of course I do," Feliciano answered. "I trained you well, and I know you can do this. Prove me right, Private Vargas. Show me that I was right about you."

Michelangelo cocked the gun in his hands. "Then let's do this, Colonel Vargas!" His eyes held fire in them. "We will make them pay! They will regret messing with us!"

Feliciano smiled with pride. "Let's get 'em!" He led Michelangelo out the door and into the war zone. "Now, stay by me!" His eyes scanned the battlefield to see Michelangelo running out without him. "Private Vargas!" he cried out.

One single gunshot seemed to stop time as Michelangelo fell to the ground, a crimson spot growing on his chest. Feliciano ran to him as fast as his legs could carry him, but it was too late. The young Private had already taken his last breath. His superior officer's blood ran cold. How could the world be so unfair? He couldn't accept this. He wouldn't.

Feliciano didn't even have time to be upset as he picked up Michelangelo's gun and began shooting at the enemy soldiers. He wanted them to pay for killing a young man with such a bright inside him burned with a passion to kill the enemy the way they killed Michelangelo. He wanted to make them pay! Nothing was going to bring the young Private back, so he had to make them _all_ pay. It was the only way to avenge his fallen man.

When Ludwig came upon the scene, he saw his lover fighting with a passion he had only seen one other time; when he had been shot. The gears in his head began turning as he laid eyes upon Michelangelo's unmoving body. This was bad. Michelangelo was dead, and Feliciano was shooting away, leaving himself wide open. Didn't he realize how dangerous that was? Ludwig had to act now, and fast!

He ran over to Feliciano. "Colonel Vargas, you're leaving yourself wide open! Get down!" Ludwig barked at him. "It's dangerous for you to be open like that! Do you want to be shot again?! Get down!"

Feliciano looked to Ludwig and then fell to his knees, tears in his eyes. "I was in charge of him!" he cried out, pointing to Michelangelo's body. "He was my responsibility! And now he's dead! He's dead, Ludwig!"

Ludwig had no idea what to say or do. He couldn't do anything to help Feliciano. There were too many people around. All he could do was sit with him until the attack was over. After all, Feliciano was no longer in any condition to fight.

.

"Twenty-seven casualties," General Mueller stated the next morning to everyone ranked Colonel and above. "That's our losses from last night."

Feliciano bit his lip. That was a pretty high number. He knew this wasn't going to be a pleasant meeting. It didn't matter that they had obliterated the Allied Forces the night before, they still had casualties. And casualties could never be accepted, no matter how many enemy soldiers went down with them. If anyone died, according to some Generals, it was still a loss.

General Mueller looked over at Feliciano. "Many of them were newer soldiers, who hadn't completed training yet. They probably fought the best that they could, but it just wasn't enough."

The Italian Colonel looked down. He couldn't look his General in the eye, not after Michelangelo died. That was one death he couldn't forgive himself for. It was his fault, and he knew it. He was honestly surprised that General Mueller wasn't yelling at him and only him. He was the one who deserved it most for letting Michelangelo die. So why wasn't General Mueller yelling?

"Though we had this many casualties, I want you to understand that it's not your fault," the General continued. "It could have been anyone." He put his hands behind his back. "So do not blame yourselves for these casualties. None of them were your fault. Death is a part of life, men. You need to understand that."

Ludwig looked down into his lap. Two of the casualties had been his men. But he didn't understand why Feliciano looked so down. His only casualty was Michelangelo. Something seemed off, but he wouldn't dare pry. Not at a time like this. This was not the time to instigate a fight.

General Mueller placed a hand on Ludwig's and Feliciano's shoulders. "You should all take a page from the notes of these two men. Between the two of them, there were three casualties. The rest of the casualties were your men." He looked down at Ludwig and Feliciano. "Well done on your training, men."

Feliciano felt a knot forming in his stomach. Was Michelangelo just another statistic to them? That wasn't fair at all! Michelangelo was a good man, dammit! And he should be remembered as such! That wasn't fair at all!

Ludwig didn't know how to react. Though the praise was nice, did he really deserve it? These were dead men they were talking about! Men who were never coming back! It bothered him that they were talking about them. Didn't General Mueller care for his fallen soldiers at all?

As General Mueller continued to praise Ludwig and Feliciano, the two stayed silent, ashamed of the praise. After all, this kind of praise wasn't worth it. This kind of praise was painful.

.

Feliciano seemed in a daze after the meeting, deeply affected by General Mueller's words. He didn't know what to say or do. It were as if he lost all will to function properly. Maybe he had. How had he managed to sit through all of that so calmly? How did he not lose his fucking mind? Everything was falling apart before his eyes, and there was nothing he could do to stop it.

Ludwig walked over to him. "Let's go talk somewhere," he softly said, placing a hand on his lover's shoulder. "Come on. You need it."

"What good will it do?" Feliciano sighed. "Talking won't bring our men back, now will it?" He crossed his arms over his chest. "I'm a bad leader, aren't I?" He continued, leaving no room for Ludwig to answer. "I let Michelangelo die, Ludwig. How could I possibly live with myself after that? Someone died because of _my_ poor leadership skills, Ludwig!"

The German grabbed his lover by the shoulders and roughly shook him. "Get ahold of yourself, Feliciano! It's not your fault, and you know it!" He then saw that Feliciano was crying and held him close. "Please, Feliciano, don't blame yourself. You can't live with that kind of guilt. It will tear you apart and eat you alive."

Feliciano clung to Ludwig with everything he had. "It's so hard!" he sobbed. "It's just so hard!"

At that moment, neither of the men cared who was watching them. All they cared about at that moment was each other and making each other comfortable. That was all that currently mattered.

.

That night, Ludwig and Feliciano went to their secret wooded area. They snuggled close together as Feliciano cried. Ludwig couldn't figure out why his lover was crying so much, but he was determined to find out.

He kissed Feliciano's forehead. "Feliciano?" he calmly asked. "What was it about him that has you crying this much?"

The Italian sniffled. "He reminded me of myself. That could've been me, Ludwig! When I first joined the military, that could've been me!" He buried his face in his hands. "I saw myself in Michelangelo. I wanted to see him climb the ranks like I did, but he was scared. He was scared to the very end…" Feliciano went quiet as he sniffled. "It's just not fair."

"But none of that is your fault," Ludwig stated. "You can't help the fact that he was scared." He snuggled Feliciano closer. "It's not your fault."

"I wish I could believe you," Feliciano sighed. "But he was scared because I didn't train him well enough."

"All of your other men survived, didn't they?" his lover challenged. "Isn't that something to be proud of?"

"I don't want to talk about this anymore," Feliciano simply stated, turning away from him. He clung tightly to Ludwig's arm that was around him as tears streamed down his cheeks. "It hurts too much."

"And it will always hurt," Ludwig reminded. "Until you get over it and accept that it's a thing that just happened that had nothing to do with you."

Feliciano angrily turned to Ludwig. "You are not in charge of how I feel. In fact, you don't know what I feel. You seem heartless over this whole affair."

"As the General said today, 'Death is a part of life'," Ludwig said with a shrug.

"I can't believe you," Feliciano scoffed, getting up. "You just stay right there. I'm going back to the base." And with that, he stormed off without looking back, no matter how many times Ludwig called after him.


	16. Chapter 16

_A/N: To all of my readers, yes, I am literal human trash. I cannot seem to update on time without taking a few months, and for that, I am sorry. I am trying my best to become human recycling, but it will take some time. Please bear with me while I work on it._

.

 _Mid-March, 1943, Russian Border_

Feliciano eventually forgave Ludwig and they went back to the way they were before Michelangelo came into the picture. Yet something still seemed off to the young Italian. He couldn't quite grasp what it was, but it bothered him. In fact, many things bothered him, like the fact that the men who died in battle were just statistics to the military. Or maybe the fact that once you died in the military, that was it. Your name never lived on, and people forgot you even existed after a month. Feliciano made it a point to never forget his fallen men, especially Michelangelo. His men would never be forgotten.

Ludwig, on the other hand, was just like all of the other superior officers and had completely forgotten about Michelangelo Vargas and the sacrifice he had made for his country. In fact, just the day after the memorial service for the fallen men, Ludwig went back to training his men as if nothing had happened. It was as if nothing could faze the German man. Nothing, that is, except Feliciano.

"Colonel Vargas, a word?" Ludwig asked, finding Feliciano in a crowded hallway. He nodded toward an unused office and led the way into it, neither of them attracting any attention from anyone. He quickly closed the door after them and turned to the redhead. "What seems to be troubling you, Feliciano?"

"How were you able to tell?" the Italian asked in shock. He bit his lip before answering. "There have been a lot of things bothering me lately." His head swam with the many questions he pondered late in the night, but the most prominent one came forward first before he could stop it. "If I were to die in battle, would anyone remember me?"

Ludwig looked confused. "What kind of a question is that?" he asked. "You are a high-ranking officer, Feliciano. Of course you would be remembered. Why would you ask something like that? Are you really that worried about it?"

Feliciano stared down at his feet. "I honestly have been," he answered. "I'm scared that I will be forgotten like the rest of our soldiers who have fallen in battle."

"I see what you're implying, but no, that will never happen to you, I swear."

"How can you be so sure?" Feliciano asked, looking up at Ludwig with teary eyes. "How can you be absolutely sure that I won't be forgotten a month after I die?"

Ludwig embraced Feliciano and cradled the Italian's head to his chest. "Because I would never let them forget you." He kissed the top of his lover's head. "I'll never allow anyone to forget the great Colonel Feliciano Vargas."

.

 _December, 1943, Russian Border_

Feliciano sighed loudly as he sat down to eat his dinner with Ludwig. "When is this damn war going to end?" he groaned. "I feel as if I've been fighting in it for a century." He looked over at his lover. "Can it be over yet?"

"The war will end when it ends, Colonel Vargas," the blond sighed back. It was true that he had also grown tired of fighting in the war. The only thing keeping him going was that he was keeping his country safe. That, and the fact that Feliciano was fighting alongside him. "Whether we like it or not, we're stuck here for now."

"I was afraid you were going to say that." The Italian frowned as he looked at the snow falling outside the window of the cafeteria. "It's so cold and miserable here." He shivered a little before turning his attention to his food tray. "I've never been somewhere as miserable as here in my entire life. I just don't know what to do anymore. Everything seems to get more miserable with each snowfall. It's like the snow is sucking the life out of this place." Feliciano sighed. "I'm just ready to go back home to Italy."

Ludwig furrowed his brow a bit as a certain thought came to his mind. He quickly looked around to make sure no one was listening before leaning in toward the Italian and softly saying, "You know, we've never talked about what's going to happen to us after the war."

"What do you mean?" Feliciano asked, not quite catching on. "I don't fully understand."

" _Us_ ," the German emphasized, gesturing between them. "I'm from Germany, and you're from Italy. What are we going to do?" He took a breath. "I don't want this to be a relationship that only lasts for the war."

The Italian reached under the table and patted his lover's leg. "I don't want it to only last for the war either," he softly admitted. "I do know that I'm dying to get back to Italy, though. I miss my _nonno_ and Lovino…"

Ludwig was silent for a moment. "I have no one to return to in Germany," he told Feliciano. "My grandfather passed away when I had first joined the military, and my brother left for Austria before the war because my grandfather was ashamed of him." He sighed. "What am I going to do?"

Feliciano smiled softly at him. "You're going to come back to Italy with me," he informed his lover. "And you will never be alone again." He squeezed Ludwig's leg. "I promise."

"What about your family?" the blond asked. "What would they think of me coming back with you?" He bit his lip a little. "Would I even be able to fit in? I don't know any Italian customs or…"

The Italian put a finger to the German's lips. "Shh. They'll love you," he quietly interjected. "Do you want to know why?" He didn't even give Ludwig time to answer before whispering, "Because I love you."

Ludwig felt his cheeks flaring up with blush as he smiled to himself. "Then I shall return to Italy with you if you still want that when the war is over," he decided.

"I would love that," Feliciano answered with a smile. "And I will always want that, Ludwig. You are a part of my heart. Forever."

"And the same goes to you," the German answered with a warm smile.

The redhead bumped his knee against his lover's, smiling. "I like that," he mused. "Now let's get to eating before meal time is over."

.

Feliciano wandered around the base in his free time later that day, looking for Ludwig. For the life of himself, he couldn't find him at all. Where could he have gone? He had checked just about everywhere when an arm reached out of an empty office and dragged him in. Taken aback, he let out a gasp of fright before realizing that it was Ludwig who had dragged him in there. He sighed in relief when Ludwig closed and locked the door behind them.

"Did you know I've been looking everywhere for you?" he asked the German, mouth quickly forming into a smile. "I have turned this whole base upside down looking for you, and here you find me first. Colonel Beilschmidt, what impressive sneak skills you have."

Ludwig smiled as well. "You forgot to check one place." He pointed to the floor. "Here." His arms wrapped around Feliciano as he pulled him close. "Now, tell me something. Why would you be looking for me? What could you possibly want to find me for?"

"Well, you see, I have many reasons," Feliciano began. "One, I just like knowing where you are. For personal reasons, you know?" He shrugged indifferently and nodded his head. "Second, I may or may not want to spend some time with you."

"What kind of time?" the German asked, pulling him closer. He gazed into the Italian's bronze-colored eyes. "What did you have planned for the two of us to do together?" His eyebrow raised as he looked closely at the Italian's ever-present smile. "Care to share?"

The Italian's eyes held a mischievous twinkle in them. "How about instead of telling you, I just show you?"

Ludwig shrugged his agreement and stepped back a little, his arms never leaving Feliciano's sides. "I guess you can show me if you'd like."

Feliciano looped his arms around Ludwig's shoulders at lightning speed and pulled him down to his level, grinning. He then pressed his lips against the German's, giggling against them. It was almost like a game to him, seeing how long they could go without showing affection for the other. Honestly, he was terrible at the game, but he couldn't help that he was such an affectionate person.

Ludwig rested his hands on Feliciano's waist as he kissed him back. He closed his eyes and let Feliciano take him from the base to a fantasy land. And in that land, no one would ever judge them for their preferences.

Once he was satisfied, the Italian pulled away, a dreamy smile on his face. " _Ti amo_ ," he half-hummed. He felt as if he were in a daze. It was true that every kiss he shared with Ludwig was magical, but that one had seemed even more magical than the rest. Maybe it was because they hadn't shared a kiss in such a long time. They didn't have much alone time to spend with each other anymore.

"I miss you," Ludwig sighed.

"But you see me every day," Feliciano laughed. "How could you possibly miss me?" He cupped Ludwig's cheek in his hand and smiled at him. "We train troops together, remember? You sometimes yell at me because I get in the way."

The German rolled his eyes, struggling to keep his smile from reaching his lips. "I know that I see you every day. I just miss seeing you like this. I miss those times we spent in the woods. I miss the times when we were alone. I miss being able to hold and kiss you. I miss _you_."

The redhead looked up at his lover with wide, bronze eyes. "Whenever you miss me in that way, always remember that I'm missing you too. Also remember that I'm not far away. After all, I'm in your heart, right?"

Ludwig sighed at Feliciano's sappy choice of words, yet he smiled and nodded. " _Ja_ ," he agreed.

"Then keep remembering the little things like that," Feliciano encouraged. "It makes it a little more bearable. Another thing to remember is that when the war is over, we can be together whenever we want! Doesn't that sound wonderful, Ludwig?" He got a lost look in his eyes as he looked up at the ceiling. "Just imagine it!"

If the German was being honest with himself, he had never had much of an imagination. He was never a creative child when he was younger, but he was smart. Yet once he met Feliciano, it were as if his imagination were finally awakened. He had begun daydreaming about a happy life with the Italian that would only happen once the war was over. Oh, how he couldn't wait.

"I always imagine it," Ludwig answered. "And it looks pretty wonderful to me."

Feliciano grabbed his lover's hands and squeezed them tightly. "It really does, doesn't it?" he dreamily asked. "We have so much to look forward to when this stupid war is finally over, Ludwig! It'll be wonderful!"

" _Ja_ , it will," the German agreed. He couldn't take his eyes off of Feliciano, but maybe that was because he didn't want to. All he wanted in that moment was to remain with his lover like that until the end of time, and if there was any way to do just that, he wished he could find it.

.

That night, Feliciano laid in bed, staring up at Ludwig's bunk. He was so close, but yet so far. It felt as if Ludwig were in another universe as far as he was concerned. Though he knew that sneaking around after lights out was pretty much prohibited to everyone but Generals, all he wanted was to sneak into an office and share an intimate moment with Ludwig. It had been months since the last time they had done that, and the Italian could barely stand it anymore. He wondered how his lover felt about all of it.

As he gazed at the German's bunk, Feliciano began to feel restless. More than anything, he wanted to at least snuggle with Ludwig in his bunk, but that wasn't allowed either. There was nothing the poor Italian could do but lay in his bunk and stare up at his lover's, wishing they could be in the same bunk.

He felt as if his ears were deceiving him when he heard Ludwig sigh. Surely he couldn't be awake, could he? It was the middle of the night. What would Ludwig be doing awake? He was an "early to bed, early to rise" kind of man. It confused him to think that his lover would be awake so late in the night.

Feliciano yawned back a response in case if Ludwig really was awake. All he had to do is wait and see if Ludwig had a response to it. Oh, how he hoped Ludwig was awake! That would be wonderful! Then he could at least kiss him again! The chorus of snores around the room told him that everyone else was in a deep sleep.

Ludwig's weight shifted a little in his bunk, his arm hanging down from his bunk moments later. The Italian reached up and grabbed his hand, squeezing it lightly. Almost instantly, the German squeezed back, signaling that he was awake as well. That made Feliciano's heart flutter as he stood up and made himself level with Ludwig.

Feliciano put his hand on the back of Ludwig's neck and pressed a kiss to his lips, hoping that his lover would accept. Oh, how he wished he could do so much more with him! All he wanted was just one wonderful sexual experience Ludwig, one that would last him a while. Then maybe he wouldn't be so horny every time he went to bed. And maybe he could sleep.

"Why aren't you asleep?" Ludwig whispered to him, a look of concern on his face. "Is something wrong?"

"I can't take it anymore, Ludwig," the Italian whispered to him, desperation in his voice. "I haven't had sex in so long. It's starting to mess with me." He cradled his head in his hands as he continued. "Not to make it seem like I'm a sex addict or something, but we haven't had sex in five months, Ludwig. I am having a hard time focusing on things and even sleeping. Every night, I just lay in my bunk and daydream about the next time we will do it. It's terrible. Even if we just touched each other, that would be fine with me, but we can't even do that." Feliciano sighed. "I'm sorry that I'm bringing this up in the middle of the night like this, but it's really bothering me."

Ludwig groaned. "But neither of us know of a place where that can actually happen, Feliciano," he whispered back. "So for now it has to be like this."

"It's bullshit," the Italian huffed. "Our needs need to be met." He stuck his lower lip out in a pout, causing Ludwig to smile. "What are you smiling for? It's not funny."

"There's never a boring moment with you, is there, Feliciano?" he asked, smile still present on his face. He reached out and gently caressed his lover's cheek. "That's one of my favorite things about you, you know. I could be around you every day of my life, but each day is different. It's never the same thing. Every day is a new adventure." Ludwig chuckled to himself. "Honestly, I think that's one reason why I fell in love with you."

The Italian smiled to himself, feeling the flush in his cheeks. His lover always knew what to say to make him happy. "Ludwig Beilschmidt," he breathed, smiling. Before he knew it, his lips were once again pressed to his lover's.

"Feliciano Vargas," the other Colonel breathed when they broke off the kiss. "You are my light when my days get dark. When I feel like everything is hopeless, I take one look at you, and I remember where my hope lies. Every time I see you, I remember that forever really does exist. Colonel Feliciano Vargas, you truly are my forever."

The Italian blinked wide eyes at his German lover. "Forever," he whispered to himself. A smile spread across his lips. "Yes, Ludwig," he softly said. "You are my forever as well. I plan to cherish you for as long as I live, and even after that." Feliciano pecked the German's lips and smiled warmly. "And that's the Honest-to-God truth."

"Is it?" Ludwig asked, smiling back at him. He reached out and grabbed the Italian's hand, caressing the back of it with his thumb. "Your hands are so soft," he mused. "How do you keep them this way in such harsh weather?"

Feliciano chuckled to himself. "It's a Vargas family secret," he answered with a wink. "My _nonna_ taught me how to do it. It's really nice and handy. Lovi doesn't really do it, but he's just stubborn anyway." When he realized he was rambling, he quickly closed his mouth tightly. "Sorry about that," he whispered. "Sometimes I can just go on and on."

"But that's my favorite part of when you talk," Ludwig softly replied. "When you ramble, it brightens up my day because there are times when I can't think of anything to talk about. So it's good to know that you always have things to talk about, otherwise we would be bored a lot."

That caused Feliciano's smile to grow wider. "I'm glad to be able to supply conversation for you," he whispered, lovingly running his fingers through Ludwig's hair. "I can't wait until this war is over, my dear. We won't have to hide anymore. We'll be free to love each other in the comfort of our own home." He sighed out quietly. "It will be wonderful."

"It really will," Ludwig quietly agreed. "Oh, how I can't wait for that day." He smiled to himself, wishing that the day would hurry up and arrive. Who knew how long the stupid war was going to last? But now there was a light at the end of the tunnel for him, and that light was his future with Feliciano. That was enough for him to hold on to so he could bear the rest of the war. Just knowing he was going to be with Feliciano was enough to keep him going.

"The feeling is mutual," the Italian admitted. "My dearest Colonel Beilschmidt, how I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with you after this is over. It will be the most incredible thing either of us will ever experience in our lives."

"That it will," Ludwig answered with a smile. "And the fact that it's you who I get to spend forever with makes it all the more incredible."

"Likewise," Feliciano breathed. His heart was soaring in his chest as he gazed at the German officer before him. Never in his life had he been so in love, and neither did he desire to feel this way about anyone else. " _Ti amo_ , Ludwig, my forever."

" _Ich liebe dich_ , Feliciano," he answered. "How I can't wait to spend the rest of forever with you."

.

 _The End_


	17. Epilogue

_A/N: Y'all, I have absolutely no excuse for not finishing this story a year ago. Sure, things have been quite busy, but that's no excuse for not updating in my case. I've recently taken on the responsibility of raising my sister's children, and the younger one has taken an interest in writing. She actually watched me type until she passed out from exhaustion. It was adorable! But anyway, here is the epilogue to the (possibly) final story of the InkVerse! It was a three-year journey to write that entire series, and I'm so glad that I was able to complete it! Now I just need to focus on the other series I made, haha! There are many more stories to come and I plan to finish each and every one of them! Thank you all for reading and reviewing! It reminded me just how important this project really is to me! I love you all!_

.

 _1945, A Small Italian Village_

Feliciano looked all around him, marvelling at the sites he thought he would never see again. There was the bakery where he and his brother went to buy bread for their grandfather. Down the street was the park they would run around in on sunny days. Three streets over was the school he had attended. And walking right beside him was the man he had fallen in love with over the past few years. He still couldn't believe that any of it was real.

He took in every last detail that he could, seeing as how the small village barely changed during his absence of the past few years. His family had no idea that he was on his way home, and he hoped to surprise them. Yet as he began to think about it, he wondered if they even remained in this town after all of those years.

In his head, Feliciano could hear his _nonno_ 's voice telling him that they would all be waiting there for him when he came home. It reassured him, reminding him that, unlike Ludwig, he still had a family and a home to return to.

Smiling cheerfully up at Ludwig, he said, "It's not too much further down this road. _Nonno_ and Lovi are going to be so excited to see us! There might even be a huge celebration! Everything is going to be great, Ludwig, you'll see!" He began to hum happily as he unknowingly picked up his pace. "I think you'll like it here!"

"Yeah?" Ludwig asked, observing the town for himself. It did have a nice aura about it. This place was unlike anywhere he had been in the last ten years. Everyone seemed happy and relaxed, especially now that the war had ended. If he had to make a quick judgement, he would have to see he liked the village. "It seems like a nice enough place."

Feliciano beamed up at him. "It really is!" he wholeheartedly agreed. "I have lived here since I was a baby! There has never been another town that I loved more!" Seeing as he had been humming before, the young Italian man burst out into bright and cheerful song as they strolled along together, waving to and greeting anyone who passed by them.

As Ludwig watched Feliciano's pleasant exchanges with the people around them, he felt a sinking feeling in his chest. It were as if his heart that always felt so light around the other man suddenly turned to lead and sunk down into his stomach. He felt as if his mind was trying to counteract his happy feelings with what people would say to him if they knew that he was once a German soldier.

 _We don't want someone like you here._

"There it is!" Feliciano cried out, pointing to an old, almost run-down looking shop. " _Nonno_ and Lovi are probably just inside the door, tending to their customers!" He grabbed onto Ludwig's sleeve, pulling him along. "Come on, Ludwig! It's right this way!"

The German man could only let himself be dragged along by his lover, but his feeling of doom only strengthened as they made their way toward the shop. He was about to meet Feliciano's family, his grandfather and his brother.

His mind suddenly flashed to the Spaniard who lay half-dead in the prison cell, the man he had helped escape. Would the man Feliciano so warmly called "Antonio" be in there as well? Was Antonio even still alive? If Antonio had died on his way home, would Ludwig be blamed for it? Suddenly, Ludwig's mind became a prison of overwhelming thoughts. Did he even deserve to go to the Vargas home after all that he had done during that war? Had Lovino even forgiven Feliciano for what had happened?

Little did Ludwig know that Feliciano was being plagued by similar thoughts as well. As Feliciano got closer and closer to the shop, the tiny voice in his head grew louder and louder. " _You aren't welcome here anymore, not after what you did!_ "

The young Italian man suddenly froze in place, nearly at the threshold of the shop. His voice was small and timid as he said, "Maybe this isn't the best idea." He looked up at Ludwig with tearful, bronze eyes. "What if Lovi still hates me for what happened?" His gaze then sorrowfully turned to the door of the shop. "I don't know what will happen if we go inside. _Nonno_ and Lovi might not want me there."

"You will never know if you never go," Ludwig stated, working through his own personal anxieties about the visit to help his lover muster the courage to go inside. "I am here beside you, Feliciano. Let me be your strength."

Feliciano took a deep breath and then nodded to himself. "You are right, Ludwig," he said, his smile returning to his face. "If I can't face them now, then I never will." After one more deep breath, he opened the door to the shop and stepped in, Ludwig right behind him.

There was no one at the counter, but the shop still seemed welcoming. The peaceful strums of a guitar could be heard coming from the living quarters as well as a melodic voice belting out a tune to go with it.

" _I've lost all ambition for worldly acclaim._

 _I just want to be the one you love,_ " the voice sang.

As Feliciano listened closely to the music he was hearing, he realized that the person singing was none other than his own brother. Before he could think, he ran through the shop and into the living quarters in the back, throwing himself at Lovino and wrapping his arms tightly around his brother as if he would disappear if he even slightly loosened his hold.

Lovino let out a yelp of surprise, dropping the guitar to the floor, but when he realized who had him in a vice grip, his brain stopped functioning. All he could say was, "Feli. You're home."

"I'm home, _fratello_!" Feliciano sobbed, not even bothering to hold back his emotions as he clung to Lovino. "I'm home!" His body became limp from crying, but he could feel Lovino supporting him. "I'm home," he repeated, voice growing weaker and weaker with sobs. "I'm home, Lovi."

Turning to face his brother, Lovino hugged him back, unaware of anything else at that moment. "Yes, Feli. You're home. Welcome home." Every bitter feeling that he had felt for his younger brother vanished upon seeing him alive and well. Nothing else mattered at that moment.

"What in the world is going…" Roma Vargas's voice trailed off as he entered the room and saw his youngest grandson for the first time in years. It were as if he were looking at a ghost. "Feli?" he weakly asked. "Is it really you?"

Feliciano let go of Lovino and stumbled over to Roma before losing all leg strength and tumbling into his grandfather's arms. "I'm home, _Nonno_ ," he softly said, clinging tightly to the man who had raised him. "It's really me. I'm home."

Roma held Feliciano tightly, gesturing for Lovino to come over and join their hug, to which Lovino reluctantly agreed. "My boys," he sobbed. "Both of my boys are home. I have waited for this day for so long! My boys are back!" He clung tightly to Feliciano and Lovino, nearly suffocating them in his desperate grip. "My heart is so full!"

It was only after they heard a light gasp from behind Roma that the Vargas family remembered where they were and what had separated them for so many years. They all pulled away as they realized there were now two more people in the room.

The youngest Vargas suddenly locked eyes with Antonio. "Toni?" he softly asked. He could barely contain his joy as he let go of Roma and Lovino to immediately embrace the slightly dazed Spaniard. "You're alive! I knew it! I knew you made it alive!"

There was suddenly a firm hand on Feliciano's shoulder that yanked him backwards and away from the man he had been hugging. "Get off of him!" Lovino angrily shouted, startling his little brother. "Don't act all chummy with Antonio when you barely even know him!" He sulked a bit, his jealousy obvious.

Antonio laughed heartily. "Are you jealous, Lovi?" he teased.

"Shut the hell up! Who would be jealous over you?!" Lovino barked back at him.

The Spaniard ruffled Lovino's hair fondly. "That's my Lovi for you," he claimed with a smile. His eyes then rested on the only unnoticed person in the room and he stiffened slightly due to past trauma. "Lieutenant Beilschmidt?" he weakly asked, horrid memories that he had worked so hard to bury resurfacing in his brain.

"I am glad that you are well, Antonio," Ludwig slowly said, thinking hard to choose the correct words. "Feliciano and I worried for you since we last saw each other. I prayed that you would live through it, and now I see that there is a god. I'm glad to see you alive."

Antonio stood there for a moment, gathering his thoughts. "Thank you, Lieutenant Beilschmidt," he said after a moment, bowing his head in gratitude. "If it wasn't for you, I would have died behind those bars. You two saved my life."

Feliciano turned to look at Ludwig with fond eyes. "Ludwig is amazing," he breathed. "He saved me as well. There is no one I trust more."

Lovino tensed up, looking at the blond in the doorway. "You," he snarled. "Who are you? Are you the man who tortured Antonio? I'll never forgive you!"

The eldest man in the room clapped a hand down on his escalated grandson's shoulder. "Calm down, Lovi," he said, a broad smile on his face. "Did you not hear the exchange between him and Toni? This man is the one who saved our Toni." He then looked to Ludwig. "May I have you name?"

"My name is Colonel Ludwig Beilschmidt," Ludwig answered, his blue eyes never wavering from the older man. "It is true that I committed treason and aided in the escape of Antonio Fernandez Carriedo. And it is also true that I did so upon Colonel Vargas's request."

Feliciano bashfully smiled, walking over to Ludwig and attempting to shrink behind him. "I just didn't want _fratello_ to be sad without Antonio," he sheepishly explained, face bright red.

"Idiot!" Lovino scoffed. "As if I would be sad without this jerk around." He shot a look over to Antonio, trying to hide their interlocked hands behind his back so no one else would notice. "He just lays around and plays the guitar all the time. Lazy jerk!"

"I can tell that my _fratello_ is fond of you," the younger brother stated, beaming at the Spaniard. "If he wasn't, he wouldn't be acting like this."

Though the atmosphere was devoid of tension, something just didn't sit right with Ludwig. He could feel Roma's eyes on him, sizing him up. Was he trying to see if he was good enough for Feliciano? Then again, did Roma know about Feliciano or the relationship the two of them shared? His mental state was crumbling the longer they all stood there, laughing together and joking. It was nerve-wracking and made him feel like he really didn't belong in the company of such pleasant people.

"I will go and make dinner," Roma announced after awhile. "This is such a happy occasion that I will make Feliciano's favorite."

It were almost as if there were legit stars in the young Italian's eyes as he exclaimed, " _Nonno_ , that sounds wonderful!" His smile was almost too big for his face. " _Grazie!_ "

The older man just smiled. "Anything for my precious grandson. Welcome home, Feli." And with that, he headed up the stairs to the living quarters.

Lovino was tending to customers in the shop as Antonio napped on the couch. The Italian man kept coming in and out to check on his sleeping lover with a frequency that was almost comical to his younger brother. "It would just be a pain if that idiot fell off the couch and hurt himself," he defensively said, searching for any excuse that he could.

After one of the many times that Lovino left after checking on the sleeping man, Feliciano turned to Ludwig, who was sitting at his feet as he himself sat on an armchair. The Italian ran his fingers through the slicked-back hair of his lover. He hummed happily as he lovingly petted his love.

"What do you think?" Feliciano gently asked, voice nearly melding with the previous hums coming from his lips. "Do you enjoy being here?"

"So much so to the point that I feel as if I don't belong here," Ludwig quietly admitted. "Everyone is so happy and carefree, yet I feel the dread of terrible things that could happen gnawing at my brain. I would love to stay here with you for as long as you would like me here, but do I really belong?"

Feliciano placed a kiss on the top of his lover's head. "Ludwig, I need you to understand exactly what I'm trying to say. Please listen well, even though I am willing to repeat myself as many times as needed to make myself clear. Are you listening?" Only after Ludwig nodded to confirm that he was listening did he continue. "I want you to stay by my side until the end of my days, Ludwig Beilschmidt. You will always belong wherever I am."

Ludwig's eyes widened at his lover's words. Did Feliciano really mean that? Was he really allowed to live that happy of a life until the end of his days? He was allowed the purest of all happiness even after fighting in a war like that? His heart almost couldn't take it. Words could not express how happy he was to hear what Feliciano had said.

Considering that he was at a loss for words, Ludwig turned his head up and pulled Feliciano down into a kiss. " _Ich liebe dich,_ " he muttered against his lover's lips. "I'll stay as long as you'll have me."

Feliciano then gently tumbled off of the armchair and into Ludwig's lap. "Then you're stuck with me forever," he breathlessly said when they came up for air. "I hope you don't mind that."

"Not even for a moment," Ludwig assured. "Forever sounds like a miracle if I get to spend it with you." He kissed Feliciano's forehead. "Yeah, I guess that should be long enough."

.

 _Venice, Italy, 1985_

"Come on, Ludwig!" Feliciano called from across one of the many bridges that loomed over the canals the enveloped the city. "We can't keep them waiting any longer!"

Ludwig sighed as he looked down off of the bridge and into the canal below him. "They wouldn't be waiting like this if you hadn't overslept, you know," he sighed. Though his irritation with his lover was always short-lived, there were days where he was more irritated with Feliciano than not. This would be one of those days, starting from when he overslept to him lecturing him about being late. Yet his irritation never changed the amount of love that he held in his heart for the other man.

Though he was most definitely older, Feliciano's carefree and borderline childlike personality still remained. He stayed as fit as he could so he could still do everything he had always enjoyed. Due to that, he easily skipped back to where Ludwig stood on the bridge. "But look at me now!" he laughed. "I'm wide awake!"

The German man couldn't hide his smile, no matter how hard he tried. Even if he had wanted his irritation to last, there was no way it could have with the way Feliciano was smiling at him. Every time Ludwig saw that smile, even after over forty years, he felt like the luckiest man alive, especially when that smile was directed at him.

"I can see that now," Ludwig laughed. "But you couldn't have said the same a half hour ago."

"We're old now, Ludwig," Feliciano defended. "We can afford to be late to things and relax. Time isn't real for us anymore."

Ludwig chuckled to himself. "Is that why we are in such a rush to meet up with your brother and Antonio right now? If time isn't real and we can afford to be late to things, then why are we rushing to the cafe?"

"Time only exists when it comes to my _fratello_ ," the Italian man corrected. "The reason it only exists with Lovi is that I don't enjoy getting punched for keeping him waiting."

"Then maybe you should try being more punctual," his lover stated as they stepped off of the other side of the bridge together. "If you worked hard at that, then your brother wouldn't yell at you nearly as much as he does."

Feliciano muttered to himself in Italian, mocking Ludwig and praying to every known deity that he would not overhear. "But that's not the way to live an exciting life," he finally told him. "A life not lived to the fullest isn't the kind of life to be desired."

"So you enjoy Lovino using you for a punching bag when you're late?" he asked. "Is that how you truly see your fullest life?" He raised an eyebrow in mock question after seeing the expression his lover was making. "Is that what you find fun?"

"You're too perceptive," Feliciano grumbled, crossing his arms over his chest in a sulk.

"No, I just know you better than anyone else does," Ludwig stated as if it were common knowledge. "After all of these years we spent together, I am a Feliciano Vargas expert."

A smile played on Feliciano's lips when he heard his lover's words. His heart swelled in his chest as he turned to face him, stopping them both in their tracks. "An expert, you say?" he teasingly asked. "If you are such an expert, then tell me exactly what I am thinking right now."

The German man gazed at him for a couple moments before saying, "You're thinking about the past forty years we have spent together. Your mind can't even begin to wrap around the fact that someone cares about you and loves you as much as I do. Even at this moment, you're wondering how I know the exact thoughts going through your head as you think them. But the reality is because I'm thinking them at the same time. You're now wondering how that could be, but the cold, hard truth is that I think you're a man born of sunshine who only makes my life brighter and better with each passing day. Did I miss anything?"

Bronze eyes gazed back at him with so much intensity that the blond felt he was being nearly assaulted. "You didn't miss a single thing," Feliciano softly stated. "In fact, you got everything so perfectly that it's almost like we have the same mind." He grabbed Ludwig's arm and pulled him into an alleyway before wrapping his arms around him and kissing him passionately. "I love you, Ludwig. So much. You are so amazing," he told him between breathless kisses.

Helpless against the onslaught of kisses, Ludwig quickly gave in and pressed Feliciano against one of the building walls as the kisses became more and more passionate. He loved losing himself in Feliciano. It was the most magical feeling in the world for him. Whenever it happened, he lost all sense of time and self.

Ludwig's mind suddenly snapped back to the situation at hand. "Feliciano, what about Lovino and Antonio? Shouldn't we get going to them? You remember that they're waiting for us right now, right?"

To silence his lover, Feliciano pressed his lips once more to Ludwig's, getting caught up in their moment together. He wasn't going to let his brother interfere with such a magical feeling. An infectious smile played on his lips as he winked at Ludwig.

Only one sentence escaped his lips before he pulled Ludwig back into another passionate kiss. "Let them wait."

 _The End_


End file.
